Humor Funny

All I wanted was a piece of cake. After the last two years, I earned a piece of chocolate torte, damn it. But I owe a friend a favor. And he’s withholding my chocolate until I find a missing key. Easy peasy. How hard can it be? Well, it would have been easy if that key didn’t open a huge can of worms. And by worms, I mean mur-der. Now, I might be married off to the highest bidder. Tatiana is missing. And a giant, sparkly drag queen will strangle me with a feather boa if I don't find his wife. You thought your last Thursday was bad. My name is Wysdom Ward. These are my case files. The ...

You’ve read plenty of erotica, but you’ve never read anything like this. This story pokes fun at everything you love about erotica, and will turn you on and also make you laugh. Bailey is a repressed, uptight, and nerdy college student. While her roommates are having fun on a Saturday night, she is in her dorm room, studying alone, just like every weekend. However, she didn’t count on a visit from an alien on a mission, a mission to help her get some action and stop being so uptight. Of course, not just any alien shows up, but a quadrillionaire alien shifter named Christian Gray (note...

Funny quotes are great; they allow us to take a quick break, relax, and take life a bit easier. And who doesn’t need those in today’s hectic life? Whether you are looking for an innovative way to cheer yourself up and deal with the daily stresses, stay focused and motivated, or simply trying to find a fantastic gift for a friend or a loved one, 500 Funny Quotes for Women could be a perfect choice!

After being together for 10 years, Sylvie and Dan have all the trimmings of a happy life and marriage; they have a comfortable home, fulfilling jobs, and beautiful twin girls and communicate so seamlessly, they finish each other's sentences. However, a trip to the doctor projects they will live another 68 years together, and panic sets in. They never expected "until death do us part" to mean seven decades. In the name of marriage survival, they quickly concoct a plan to keep their relationship fresh and exciting.

Did you know that a measles outbreak led to the assigning of phone numbers? How about the fact that pirates are the reason we don’t use the metric system in the United States? Or that there’s actually a reason why stepping on a Lego hurts so damn much? Now I Know: The Soviets Invaded Wisconsin?! is the ultimate challenge for even the biggest trivia buff. Based on the very popular newsletter, you are guaranteed to learn something new despite how much you already think you know.

Alright, you know how the saying goes: "Sharing is caring," right? Well, get ready because this story is a banger! It dives deep into the vault of my childhood memories, and trust me, it's a doozy. We all have those formative experiences that shape who we are, but mine... well, let's just say my mother took a slightly different approach to parenting. Instead of the stereotypical, overflowing-with-affection kind of motherly love, I drew the short straw and got myself a narcissist. Think back to those moments of pure, unadulterated childhood pride. Remember that time you brought home a ...

A collection of poems—101 to be exact—of the musings of poopings, to which you'll react, with snickering and giggling, while you are hopefully, taking a crap. And each poem here, is presented of course, with an illustration, that'll have you smiling from ear to ear.

"Why do conservatives hate comedy? Why is there no right-wing Jon Stewart?" These sorts of questions launch a million tweets, a thousand op-eds, and more than a few scholarly analyses. That's Not Funny argues that it is both an intellectual and politically strategic mistake to assume that comedy has a liberal bias. Matt Sienkiewicz and Nick Marx take listeners—particularly self-described liberals—on a tour of contemporary conservative comedy and the "right-wing comedy complex."

I wanted a surprise party, not a zombie apocalypse. For my 42nd birthday, I think I’m getting a surprise party. But my best friend didn’t invite me to her office for a party. She wants me to find a missing corpse. Dr. Faith Jackson, the Regional Medical Examiner, lost a body on her watch. If I can’t find the missing corpse, Faith could lose her job. And a murder suspect will get off scot-free. The Reluctant Corpse is anything but the start of the zombie apocalypse. And the odds are good - I might end up in a dumpster before it’s all said and done. Must be Thursday. The Reluctant ...

Aspiring potion-witch Isabella Proctor dreams of a normal life away from magic. But when she stumbles upon her mentor's lifeless body, her world turns upside down, and a simple life seems far from reach. Suddenly entangled in a murder investigation, Isabella finds herself the prime suspect in the eyes of the newly-arrived Detective Palmer. Juggling a failing apothecary, a grandmother who sees people that aren't there, and a police department inexperienced in solving murders, Isabella must use her wits and magic to clear her name. With danger lurking around every corner and her freedom on ...

'A must for cat lovers.' Woman's Realm 'Alice's Diary is written by a six year old mixed tabby. The small events and great adventures of the year are told with relish. Light and amusing.' The Lady 'Compulsive reading for cat lovers.'- Smallholder 'I loved this unusual book.' - Lincolnshire Echo 'Alice's Diary has already won a big following.' - Belfast Newsletter 'Will delight and amuse.' - Evening Echo 'For pure charm and humour read this diary.' Bella "Gently thought provoking and hilariously funny.' Basildon Echo 'Delightful.' Doncaster Star 'Will entertain and amuse and might help you ...

Captain Willard Phule has whipped his troops into shape, turning Phule's Company from the laughingstock of the Legion into...a crack team of casino security guards. Now his company is deployed to help an underdeveloped planet. And what better way to utilize their major area of expertise - goofing off - than to turn the planet into the biggest intergalactic playground ever?

PTA meetings: the ultimate battleground for passive-aggressive arguments, unnecessary debates about gluten-free bake sales, and power-hungry parents who think they should run the school district. But what if you could take it to the next level? What if you could become legendary? This book is your ultimate (and completely unapproved) guide to turning PTA meetings into unforgettable spectacles. Whether you're looking to derail discussions with absurd questions, fake deep concern over irrelevant issues, or just make everyone deeply uncomfortable, this masterclass in disruption has you covered...

A Little Book of Funny Poems is a lighthearted collection of forty-one poems written for modern life. From tablet trouble to texting, online dating to airport security, abusive coaching to bratty kids, work life to leisure activities, this book has a funny and thoughtful piece for everyone.

Laugh along with the antics of Sir Rodney. It's good for your health. Sir Rodney is An Old World charmer A world-class bumbler A farcical snob A lovable eccentric Sir Rodney, the hero of our little book, and his overly admiring narrator show us that pretentiousness and silliness are more than likely close cousins and that both have lived long and healthy lives.

This marriage will be a convenient business arrangement and nothing more. No strings attached, and above all—no broken hearts. Growing up in a broken home taught me to watch out for myself, and that the only love out there is what I create. That's why I stick to taking care of my baby sister and the hodgepodge of wildlife I volunteer to rehabilitate. Add in a stray puppy I found under the car with the help of Wil, a grumpy single dad move-in to Button Blossom, and everything’s good. He's cute. (The puppy, not Wil…well, okay. Wil's broody, which also makes him a teensy bit hot.) Except...

A wedding and a murder...Star football player and NFL hopeful, Michael “Bumper” Hackett is getting married. Word’s going around that it’s a shotgun wedding, and there just might be some truth to it, seeing that the bride-to-be is showing a baby bump. But before the ceremony can even get started, the poor groom collapses from what appears to be an asthma attack. Unfortunately, things aren’t always what they seem. Romaine knew it was a bad idea to have a wedding at the funeral home, but newly elected justice of the peace and sole proprietor of the Ball Funeral Home & Crematorium, ...

When Tiffany and Ian go to Uncle Joe’s family reunion party, they don’t expect to run into a killer… A Cupcakes-and-Crime Caper But that’s exactly what happens when Uncle Joe’s ex-wife Beryl is found dead! Trapped inside Beryl’s creepy old house by an avalanche, Tiffany and Ian must work quickly to uncover who among the other houseguests is the killer. As Beryl’s unsavory past starts coming to light, Tiffany realizes that quite a few people staying in the house have secrets of their own, and good reason to want Beryl dead. From disgruntled family members to secret lovers, to ...

She’s all business. He’s all charm. It's just one little kiss. What's the harm? Dr. Katherine Drake has zero patience for fantasy. Her world is built on logic, hard work, and a schedule that doesn’t include fairy tales. So how does she end up at a comic convention, surrounded by caped crusaders, space wizards, and—oh no—grown men in pony costumes? Alexander Weber may be Hollywood royalty, but he’s tired of red carpets, fake smiles, and love that only lasts until the tabloids move on. When he crosses paths with a woman who isn’t impressed by his fame, he’s instantly intrigued...

The Young, the Rich, and the Scandalous… When Josh moved in next door, the only thing hotter than our chemistry was the gossip. The whispers started before we even finished our first flirty conversation by the pool. ✔ Wealthy widow? Check. ✔ Hot, younger neighbor? Check. ✔ Scandal? Oh, absolutely. Palm Beach loves a juicy story, and this one writes itself. They think I’m a gold digger, but I’d trade every dime of my late husband’s fortune for just one more night with him. Still, that didn’t stop the rumors back then, and it sure won’t stop them now—especially when Josh ...