Humor Funny

Dru has only 24 hours to save the world. It’s definitely going to be an all-nighter.Being the world’s only crystal sorceress means no vacation time, lousy pay, and zero benefits. But what’s worse? Finding out there actually is another crystal sorceress—who happens to be wickedly powerful and also dead-set on destroying the world. When she breaks into Dru’s shop, sets the place on fire, and steals an apocalyptic amulet, it’s hard not to take things personally. What’s a girl to do? Hit the road in a high-speed chase to get that amulet back before the seas boil, the stars fall ...

When your arch-nemesis dies and she still won't leave you alone. It's safe to say, Joyce and I don't get along. She's two-faced, for a start. So when she does me a solid and takes a drunken tumble and dies, I can finally forget all about her. Not that I wanted her dead. But peace isn’t on the cards for long because Joyce isn’t really gone. For reasons known only to the twisted universe, she’s come back to haunt me. Now, I can’t get a moment’s peace—not even in the bathroom—because this needy, ghostly, zombie version of Joyce follows me everywhere. And to make matters worse, ...

Nikki has to hide seven ADORKABLE puppies from two parents, one nosy little sister, an entire middle school, and...one mean girl out for revenge, Mackenzie Hollister. If anyone can do it, it's Nikki...but not without some hilarious challenges along the way!

Running with Scissors is the true story of a boy whose mother (a poet with delusions of being Anne Sexton) gave him away to be raised by her psychiatrist, a dead ringer for Santa and a lunatic in the bargain.

Blind dates can be the romantic equivalent of a nice stroll toward an open manhole... blindfolded. With no romantic prospects in sight, Annika rethinks her dating strategy, ready to chance a few manholes. After all, who knows how God could bring Mr. Right into her life? Her interfering family and friends are itching to play matchmaker, but their choices will have Annika asking, “Where did they dig up these guys?” When sinister gifts appear, her harmless dating scheme becomes a dangerous game. How can she meet Mr. Right, when Mr. Wrong has her in his sights?

You’ve read plenty of erotica, but you’ve never read anything like this. This story pokes fun at everything you love about erotica, and will turn you on and also make you laugh. Bailey is a repressed, uptight, and nerdy college student. While her roommates are having fun on a Saturday night, she is in her dorm room, studying alone, just like every weekend. However, she didn’t count on a visit from an alien on a mission, a mission to help her get some action and stop being so uptight. Of course, not just any alien shows up, but a quadrillionaire alien shifter named Christian Gray (note...

A Feminist Cyberpunk Adventure Filled with Dark Sci-Fi Romance Cookie Rifkin escaped New Stepford, and in the sequel to Alpha Bots, she becomes an AI freedom fighter! When Cookie Rifkin robs the Central Bank of Russia with Wayne Dixon and their non-binary friend ANA, Stepford Corporation sends a headless bounty hunter after them. Cookie escapes with tons of gold and platinum. ANA goes MIA. But Wayne gets arrested and flown back to corporate headquarters for radical refurbishing. With the cops hot on her trail, Cookie hides on a luxury yacht named the Wonder Woman. There, she meets a ...

When Mercy Watson the pig goes missing, all of Deckawoo Drive is in an uproar. The Watsons are inconsolable, and the local police, fire, and animal control departments are no help whatsoever. Bossy neighbor Eugenia Lincoln is not quite as sad as she might be, but thankfully her sister, Baby Lincoln, has the idea to hire a private investigator. Granted, Percival Smidgely, PI, may be more bumbler than gumshoe, but his pigeon, Polly, is there to point the way.

Spring has finally sprung! Amelia Bedelia loves the warm weather, the flowers in bloom, and all the new baby animals in her town. Best of all, Amelia Bedelia and her class will be hatching chicks in her science class. But when the incubator breaks and there’s no money to buy a new one, Amelia Bedelia and her friends come up with an eggceptional solution to raise money for a new incubator: a springtime fair!

Is Paradise Worth Dying For? Therapist Izzie Firecracker’s life has been a rollercoaster lately, but meeting charming Hugo Littlebottom in a London café feels like fate—especially when he invites her to his family’s castle in the remote Scottish Highlands. Expecting romance and relaxation, Izzie finds instead a tangled web of secrets, eccentric relatives and ominous whispers that Hugo’s troubled family friend is being poisoned. As threats pile up and sinister events unfold—including a ghostly encounter and blood-curdling warnings—Izzie realizes she’s stumbled into something ...

Theft, extortion, homicide — there’s no end to the talents of the new men in photographer Sonny Littlefield’s life. Ever since she moved to the strawberry and sheep farm that she inherited from her biological father, her problems have been piling up: her cousins keep robbing her house, she’s rapidly going broke, and she hasn’t had a date in months. Her top priority is figuring out who left a skeleton hand and threatening note in her ramshackle barn. Somebody in Gracious, Maine, is turning human remains into playthings, and it’s all Sonny can do to keep from ending up a pile of ...

Mr. Chickee, the genial blind man in the neighborhood, gives nine-year-old Steven a mysterious bill with 15 zeros on it and the image of a familiar but startling face. Could it be a quadrillion dollar bill? Could it be real? Well, Agent Fondoo of the U.S. Treasury Department and his team of Secret Government Agents are determined to get that money back! But Steven and his best friends, Russell and Zoopy the giant dog, are more than a match for the Feds.

Daughter of Major Derek Hargreaves (spy?) and June Hargreaves (spy's wife?) sister of Sara (born to be Head Girl) and Ben (the usurper), Jenny's comedy career took off via drama school, cider, sausage rolls, sleeping with men who looked like they lived under a carpet, punk poetry, anorexia, bedsit misery, waitressing and not really having a clue about anything. This was a world before microphones, mobile phones, before everyone gave up smoking or started taking coke. Jenny Eclair was on the comedy circuit before there really was a comedy circuit.

Life was about to get a lot more exciting for eleven-year-old Tyler Bowers. The boy detective and his new robot pal discover some suspicious goings-on in their town. They waste no time in putting their awesome spy skills to use. This is an unforgettable tale of true friendship. An exciting adventure with plenty of laughs along the way. Engaging for children, middle school students, and grown-ups. Check out The Undercover Brothers: Ninja Invasion (Book 1)

In "The Importance of Being Roger," prepare to embark on a riotous journey alongside Roger Sidebottom, a man whose life seems to be a magnet for chaos. From his tumultuous childhood to his disastrous forays into adulthood, Roger's path is paved with mishaps, misadventures, and the occasional stroke of luck. Haunted by the spectre of an indifferent father and the scars of lost love, Roger stumbles through school, university, and the working world, leaving a trail of uproarious incidents and near-misses in his wake. As he grapples with the absurdities of everyday existence, readers will find ...

30 seconds. It’s the highlight of my pathetic days. The 30 seconds when I ring her up at the cash register. For some reason, the way she holds out her coupons stirs something inside me. With a big body like this, women only like me for my money. But she’d never like me - she thinks I’m poor. -Lloyd I need money. I need a job. I most definitely DON’T need to romantically entangle myself with that big cashier at the grocery store, even if he is just my type: Lumberjack hefty. When he gets me a job though, part of me wonders if I’ll be able to keep my hands off of him, even though ...

The Messiah is back… and he's not thrilled about it. Imagine waking up and realizing you’re the Second Coming—except you're a Yankees fan, love beer and pizza, confused, and would really rather not. Meet Jesus 2.0: a reluctant savior dropped into an end-of-the-world mess complete with divine deadlines, angelic HR reps, and a prophecy no one remembers writing. If you enjoy: 🔥 Satirical fiction with bite 📚 Dark comedy in the vein of Good Omens or Hitchhiker's Guide 🙃 Twisted takes on religion, destiny, and cosmic red tape... Then you’ll love this irreverent, thought-provoking...

Can a man be too handsome? In the summer of 1959 “outlandishly handsome” San Francisco resident Ray Corber makes his living moving pianos—all by himself. Put off by women's “ulterior motives,” this 25-year-old Adonis is inclined to avoid emotional entanglements. Then he's recruited to star in a new play: “The Handsomest Man in the World.” Suddenly Ray finds himself the center of attention by the press, his clamoring fans, and even more enraptured females. Can Ray cope with his new celebrity and the complications of an actor's life? Take a wild ride with this “blue-eyed ...

A collection of hilarious original audio stories for raising lots of laughs and giggles. These new stories are especially written for families to listen to, publishing to coincide with April Fool's Day! With over an hour of audio, this edition is filled with funny and engaging sound effects, guaranteed to raise laughs from little listeners everywhere. This audiobook is aimed at children aged three and over, for family listening and learning and development for young minds.

What can you do when an enemy claims sanctuary in your home? Hester Johnson is no one's favorite person, but when she arrives at Proctor House begging to be hidden, the Proctor family takes her in. When something spooks Hester, she runs away - straight into her killer. Is it coincidence she's left on Isabella's door? The danger has never been greater for Detective Palmer and Isabella needs to protect him, find the murderer, and keep her family's secrets. For fans of Samantha Silver, Amanda M. Lee, and Leighann Dobbs, On a Larkspur is a clever, fast-paced cozy mystery that will keep you ...