Humor Funny

In honor of Presidents’ Day, A.J. and Andrea from Ella Mentry will compete against their Dirk School rivals in the ultimate Presidents’ Day Challenge! The winning school will get bragging rights, a free trip to an amusement park, and a top-secret prize. The only problem is that A.J. doesn’t know anything about US presidents, unless it involves their use of toilets! Will A.J. and Andrea be able to work together as a team and bring home the win?

Paranormal Women’s Fiction from #1 Amazon bestseller, J.R. Rain, and New York Times bestseller, H.P. Mallory! It’s December 21 and the first night of the celebration of Yule! Much to Lorcan’s feigned irritation, Wanda is in the midst of throwing a Yule celebratory party at one of his numerous residences within Haven Hollow. But, yuletide exaltation is hardly on his mind. The only thing Lorcan can think about, other than the long and smooth line of Wanda’s delicate neck, is his Yule gift still awaiting her. But, as with most things involving the vampire and the Blood Witch, not ...

A collection of poems—101 to be exact—of the musings of poopings, to which you'll react, with snickering and giggling, while you are hopefully, taking a crap. And each poem here, is presented of course, with an illustration, that'll have you smiling from ear to ear.

You wont stop laughing with "World's Funniest Jokes". An incredible collection of mainly dirty jokes, puns and humor targeted mainly at adults. Guaranteed to make you laugh out loud, you will love sharing these jokes with your buddies. Customers with Kindle Unlimited and Amazon Prime can read this book for FREE. And, if for some reason, you are not 100% satisfied, you get your money back!

30 seconds. It’s the highlight of my pathetic days. The 30 seconds when I ring her up at the cash register. For some reason, the way she holds out her coupons stirs something inside me. With a big body like this, women only like me for my money. But she’d never like me - she thinks I’m poor. -Lloyd I need money. I need a job. I most definitely DON’T need to romantically entangle myself with that big cashier at the grocery store, even if he is just my type: Lumberjack hefty. When he gets me a job though, part of me wonders if I’ll be able to keep my hands off of him, even though ...

Dogs Are Human Too, LOL! is not just another dog book. It’s the book your dog would buy for you if they had a credit card and opposable thumbs. In a world full of dry training manuals, scientific textbooks, and recycled advice columns, this book stands out by doing something few others dare: It gives dogs a voice. It tells their real stories. It reminds you that your dog isn't “just a pet”—they're a full-fledged, fur-covered person with a sense of humor, a heart full of loyalty, and a mischievous twinkle in their eye. Told through unforgettable stories, hilarious canine confessions,...

Want to get back at your kids for making you put up with the most nauseating encounters, while still enjoying some quality time with them? Here’s a unique way of accommodating your child’s preference for the distasteful things in life, without getting yourself dirty. Prepare to be revolted, stumped, and totally tickled with this insane family challenge!

I’m sleeping with my dad’s billionaire best friend. I headed to Mystic, Connecticut, a month ago to help a family friend, not seduce him. Mateo Steele. He’s a grump—damaged and broody. He is also a Grade A silver fox—former SEAL, with a fantastic body and beautiful blue-grey eyes. Being a 28-year-old virgin is a rarity, but I am ready to be broken open by this hot stud of a man. The problem is that he is off-limits. I started working at the beautiful Inn he built right on the water. While checking in guests, I’m checking him out. Mateo starts to let his guard down and saves me ...

Lottie’s just been dumped, or at least she thinks she has. With a university reunion looming she has nothing to show for the past ten years except a part-time job in her friend’s plant shop and a jar of pickled gherkins. To console herself Lottie seeks solace in her favourite corner of the internet, a mysterious level-up life guru who preaches words of wisdom from the comfort of stunning exotic locations, and it’s definitely cheaper than spending money on tarot readings. With her big dick energy ex off travelling the world in search of the perfect veneers, Lottie finds herself ...

Please do NOT buy this book (or any in this series) expecting it to be anything like the Bilbury series. Just Another Bloody Year describes a year in Vernon Coleman's bizarre and tempestuous life. Comes with many health warnings. Unsuitable for the overly sensitive and the politically correct.This book contains no fats, saturated or otherwise. It is not a toy and is unsuitable for children under three years if age. It may contain nuts. May have been written in a building where salt, mustard, ketchup and other condiments are used. Passages written when the author was under stress, upset or ...

Izzy, her boyfriend, and her holiday-crashing neighbor, Etta, are off to the driest, flattest, and most infertile inhabited continent on earth - where even the cutest of creatures might try to kill you. But that’s only the beginning of their problems. A Taste Society courier goes missing. And 26 hours after Izzy lands in Australia, a crocodile is found dead. With a human corpse inside. Not quite the start to her relaxing holiday she’d been hoping for.

This is the second of Edward Vernon's books about a young GP. (Edward Vernon is a pen name of a well known British doctor/author.) Set in the 1970s, in a small town in the English midlands, the book describes the medical misadventures of a young, harassed GP who is learning on the job. There's the embarrassed vicar with the guilty secret, the private patient who pays him to keep her ill, a beautiful young patient who insists on being examined in the bath, a six year old marble swallower and an a difficult encounter with a patient who can't speak a word of English. A huge hit in the UK and ...

As one of the most popular influencers on social media, Mia Bell has lived her life online for years. With her celebrity dog and gorgeous fiancé, she is planning the ultimate virtual wedding - expensive, elaborate, and entirely paid for by sponsors. But off-camera, her world is far from picture perfect. After being jilted by her fiancé and faking her nuptials to please her sponsors, Mia finally has had enough. She heaves her phone off a cliff, ready to live - and maybe find love - offline for a change.

In a quiet neighborhood where pizza deliveries are as normal as forgotten homework, twelve-year-old Max Murdock discovers something no kid ever expects—a mysterious, glowing pizza box that follows him home. But this is no ordinary takeout. Inside the box lies a swirling portal to a vast and wildly unpredictable universe made entirely of living toppings, sauce-powered machines, and crust-based civilizations. Joined by his hilarious best friend Logan, a fearless classmate named GraceMarie, and the cryptic clues left by a banished flavor genius, Max is recruited into Za & Beyond—an ancient...

Do you want to join the ranks of the Intergalactic Diplomatic Corp. but don't know what to do? This book is for you. Learn all the tips and tricks for dealing with aliens across the universe. Start your new career now in the intergalactic diplomatic corp.

This book is not about life and death struggles. This book is the polar opposite. It is about the absolute, over-the-top insanity that I have witnessed during my time in the ER. This book is the untold, unseen, and unshared rants and raves of an ER nurse who has been slowly driven mad by his patients. I want you, the listener to step into my scrubs, see this bizarre world through my eyes, and understand that once you stop laughing in the ER, it's time to quit.

Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend - that's right, just one - at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like a mix of salted pork and Icelandic bog). The problem is, Greg isn't ordinary... he's actually a fantastical Dwarf! He discovers the truth the day his dad brings home a gross new tea - one that awakens bizarre abilities in Greg. Then a murderous Bro-Troll kidnaps his dad and Greg is whisked away to the Underground, where Dwarves have lived for centuries right beneath Chicago.

This marriage will be a convenient business arrangement and nothing more. No strings attached, and above all—no broken hearts. Growing up in a broken home taught me to watch out for myself, and that the only love out there is what I create. That's why I stick to taking care of my baby sister and the hodgepodge of wildlife I volunteer to rehabilitate. Add in a stray puppy I found under the car with the help of Wil, a grumpy single dad move-in to Button Blossom, and everything’s good. He's cute. (The puppy, not Wil…well, okay. Wil's broody, which also makes him a teensy bit hot.) Except...

For fans of Nora Ephron’s I Feel Bad About My Neck, meet Ivanka—a woman on a mission to figure out where the last twenty years disappeared to. She did find the twenty pounds her friend lost the other day—on her thighs! But as for the missing two decades? That’s a real mystery. Were they spent savoring endless plates of pasta in Tuscany, sipping wine in the Chianti, or just lost in the whirlwind of everyday life? Whatever the case, Ivanka’s journey is less about lamenting the passage of time and more about laughing at the absurdity of it all. This book is for you if your pants now ...

A Regency Time Travel Romance from New York Times bestselling author Kasey Michaels. All American book editor Cassandra Kelley wanted to do was escape the tour group slowly making it’s way through the Tower of London by slipping down a convenient hallway. Once the group moved on, she could find a bus and return to the London Book Fair. It wasn’t as if she was doing anything too terribly wrong. She certainly didn’t expect to feel herself drawn to the winding staircase she encountered, but she couldn’t resist a slight detour. Once she reached the small room at the base of the stairs a...