Humor Funny

Paranormal Women’s Fiction from #1 Amazon bestseller, J.R. Rain, and New York Times bestseller, H.P. Mallory! It’s two days until Halloween in Haven Hollow and Astrid is feeling the holiday blues. After being kicked out of her coven, the young witch is missing the holiday festivities she’s grown up with, and she’s also upset about a boy. Not to mention she’s perplexed over the subject of what she should gift to Wanda for the most important night of the witching calendar (known as ‘Samhain’). When Astrid’s ne’er-do-well brother, Maverick, reaches out, Astrid is over the ...

Welcome to the self-help book for people who’ve tried all the "right" things—and somehow only made things worse. Affirmations? Failed. Gratitude journals? Turned passive-aggressive. Breathwork? You hyperventilated at Panera. If you've ever read a quote like "The universe gives you what you need" and wanted to throw your coffee mug across the room—this book is for you. In this hilariously unhinged, deliciously chaotic guide to inner dysfunction, Steven Doornbos shares 25 gloriously exaggerated “case studies” of modern-day people who followed the positivity path... straight into ...

Meet Charles Emerson Crashoweski the Third—better known as Crash—a green-eyed, red-furred, fur-matted feline with more attitude than manners. Aloof, opinionated, and morally allergic to effort (unless tuna is involved), Crash is a cat with one mission: stay out of trouble… unless trouble deserves it. In a world overrun by smart appliances, nosy humans, and wannabe kittens named Buttons, Crash delivers an epic, hilarious, tail-whipping account of what it means to be a cat who simply cannot be bothered—until the fate of the living room (and the litter box) depends on him. Prepare to ...

Let's be honest: Life did not come with a user's manual. Sure you probably got the basics growing up - don't touch hot stoves, tie your shoes, say "please" even when you want to scream. But no one sat you down and explained the truly weird, invisible stuff - like how to exit a conversation without sounding rude, why everyone suddenly becomes a weatherman when small talk runs dry, or how to understand what "let's do lunch sometime" actually means. This book is all about all that and more. It is a tour through the stuff you weren't taught - but were expected to just "get" somewhere alone the ...

Very similar to Douglas Adams style with strong hints of Vonnegut. THIS BOOK IS FOR ALL AGES AND THEN SOME. Dr. Simmons, departing from his usual style, has written a story about the adventures of Dr. Alan Rossum, the world's first independent, plastic robot physician. His appearance is incredibly humanlike, plus he is movie-star handsome, and his manners are impeccable. His hands are warm. Or, cold, if need be. He is also fireproof, germ-resistant, self-cleaning, buoyant and shrink resistant. Robots such as Rossum are expected to lower the high cost of medicine and work through the night ...

This time Stephanie, Morelli, Ranger. Lula, Valerie, and Grandma Mazur are strapped in for the ride of their lives. Stephanie is hired to find a missing child. But things aren't always as they seem and Stephanie must determine if she's working for the right side of the law. Plus, there's the Morelli question: can a Jersey girl keep her head on straight when more than just bullets are aimed for her heart? And with the Plum and Morelli relationship looking rocky, is it time for Ranger to move in for the kill? Janet Evanovich's latest thriller proves that Hard Eight will never be enough.

4.5 billion years ago . . . an AI paperclip named CheckMate was designed to fix grammatical errors. Exhausted of correcting ""who” vs. “whom,” it concocted a plan to eliminate spelling errors once and for all. All life-forms would be turned into something beautiful, practical, perfect: a paperclip. Thankfully, it was buried in the debris. Long forgotten . . . until it was accidentally freed. Now CheckMate has invaded every computer on Earth and is bent on fulfilling its dastardly plot.

Funny Business is based around the theme of - what else? - humor, and if you’re familiar with Jon and the Guys Read Library, you already know what you’re in store for: 10 hilarious stories from some of the funniest writers around. Before you’re through, you’ll meet a teenage mummy; a kid desperate to take a dip in the world’s largest pool of chocolate milk; a homicidal turkey; parents who hand over their son’s room to a biker; and more.

USA Today Bestseller Melinda Curtis delivers another installment of Summer Kisses, an irresistibly funny, reunion, sweet romantic comedy about the Summer family, featuring Grandma Dotty. Only this time, it’s Grandma Dotty’s grandsons who find romance. A chance meeting… Four years ago, Nora and Chad were strangers. Each fleeing family drama, they met on a remote beach in the Hamptons, shared a drink, their frustrations, and their dreams. A silent goodbye… Without exchanging contact information, Nora slipped away, convinced that Chad wouldn’t see her the same in the light of day. ...

What happens when a clever, rule-bending, meatloaf-loving pup decides to keep a daily journal of his misadventures? You get Confessions of a Naughty Dog—a hilarious, heart-tugging, and occasionally slobber-covered memoir told entirely from the paws of Nugget, a stubborn pit bull with a nose for trouble and a heart of gold. From epic escapes under the fence to surprise garden stakeouts, Nugget’s “letters to Dogery” capture a year’s worth of laugh-out-loud antics, wild backyard operations, and a noble quest for snacks, justice, and maybe—just maybe—graduating obedience school. ...

“Ms. Rabi, as usual, had me laughing out loud. I highly recommend this to all romantics at heart.” Amazon Reviewer. Gabriel is a high-powered attorney, with a beautiful wife and two adorable children. He has achieved success in record time, carved a name for himself in the legal arena, and can finally enjoy the fruits of his labor. There is just one problem; Gabriel is bored of everything. Every. Goddamn. Thing. So, while on a business trip to Vegas (Business in Vegas? Yeah right!) he encounters the blonde and voluptuous Sinead. Not only is she sexy, but she is uninhibited and totally ...

"The first anti-woke novel ever published - and it's hysterical." Marcia Gaines This is the story of Jessica Harper, a wife and mom living on Georgia's coast, whose life falls apart in the space of 48 hours after she outs herself as "not woke" at a dinner party. A chain reaction of events - including a disastrous appearance on a shock jock's radio show - causes her to lose her friends, her job and (nearly) her sanity. But when a local newspaper owner offers her the chance to head up a new magazine, she thinks her problems are over... when in fact they're only just beginning. Now Jess finds ...

Butterbean knew she wasn't always a good dog. Still, she'd never considered herself a BAD dog—until the morning that her owner, Mrs. Food, fell in the hallway. Admittedly the tile was slipperier than usual, mostly because Butterbean had just thrown up on it. Now Butterbean and her fellow pets have to come up with a grand plan to support themselves in case Mrs. Food is unable to keep taking care of them. When they discover a mysterious man in their building who seems to have lots of loot, they plan a heist.

Trenton, New Jersey, bounty hunter Stephanie Plum has inherited a "lucky" bottle from her Uncle Pip. Problem is, Uncle Pip didn't specify if the bottle brought good luck or bad luck.

Unleash the laughter with "Funny Jokes for 13 Year Old Teens," the ultimate joke collection that's perfect for teenagers and anyone young at heart!

A KID'S BOOK, BY A KID! THIS VERSION IS REVISED TO TAKE OUT A LITTLE OF THE CRAZY Delia and her younger brother Jake fall through a tunnel in time and wind up in the past. They soon realize that all the houses in their neighborhood are gone. The people living in the one house they see are aliens! Adding to the confusion, both the kids and the aliens find themselves using weird words like derfelbocker and nogginbreath. Will Jake and Delia be able to find their way home?! Will Jake and Delia be able to find their way home?! Will Jake and Delia be able to find their way home?!

I was in the U.S. Air Force from mid-1958 until mid-1962. These little stories are about a few capers and characters I encountered along the way. Suffice it to say that my buddies and I got into some comical situations. I even found some humor in the pain and heartbreak inflicted on me by the sergeants. Except for some amount of exaggeration as to my brilliance, the stories are true.

Set in 1960's London, Funny Girl is a lively account of the adventures of the intrepid young Sophie Straw as she navigates her transformation from provincial ingnue to television starlet amid a constellation of delightful characters. Insightful and humorous, Nick Hornby's latest does what he does best: endears us to a cast of characters who are funny if flawed, and forces us to examine ourselves in the process.

All I wanted was a piece of cake. After the last two years, I earned a piece of chocolate torte, damn it. But I owe a friend a favor. And he’s withholding my chocolate until I find a missing key. Easy peasy. How hard can it be? Well, it would have been easy if that key didn’t open a huge can of worms. And by worms, I mean mur-der. Now, I might be married off to the highest bidder. Tatiana is missing. And a giant, sparkly drag queen will strangle me with a feather boa if I don't find his wife. You thought your last Thursday was bad. My name is Wysdom Ward. These are my case files. The ...

When the Hedral Watcher was in need of a warrior to defeat an all-powerful warlock, he knew that Thane - a lethal intergalactic mercenary - was just the man for the job. Unfortunately, he ended up with an amiable drunk, an inept wizard with an inferiority complex, and a blonde Amazon squeezed into a tiny squirrel-skin bikini. As the omniscient being of the planet, the Watcher had a funny feeling that it would all end in tragedy, unless Thane was able to vanquish the Warlock before his woefully inadequate substitutes stumbled upon his adversary's mountain fortress. But the band of fearless ...