Humor Funny

Paranormal Women’s Fiction from bestsellers HP Mallory and JR Rain! Living in Misty Hollow hasn’t been perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but it’s been a nice break from always being on the run. But owing to the nightmares that keep plaguing my daughter, Luna, I know we can’t stay here much longer. And adding in the fact that another two vampires have just moved to town? Yeah, that’s an added reason we can’t stick around. Even though I might be a bruja, I’m still a witch. And the rule that witches and vampires hate one another still stands. Of course, I can’t seem to...

Clive Hapgood is feeling stuck. The private school he teaches at is consuming his life, no thanks to wretched headteacher Julian Crouch. The gentle country life Clive envisaged has stifled him and left his marriage on the brink. What he needs is a holiday - something to remind him and Helen what life used to be like. But when things don't go to plan, and an incident at school begins to weigh heavy on his head, Clive's life starts to unravel in front of him. Has he got it in him to turn things around, whatever the cost? After all, it's his own time he's wasting....

I just broke my biggest rule. Never fall in love with a patient Emerson Stone is the best forward in professional hockey. His speed and agility are legendary. His smile can melt the iciest hearts. He’s sweet both on and off the ice. And his career is in my hands. My new position with the Houston Snowhawks is a dream come true. But doing my job means keeping Emerson off the ice. Can I keep my job, my sanity, and my heart unbroken? Buckle in for book two in my new steamy sports series! Down To Puck is a fast-paced hockey romance featuring a no-nonsense team doctor and the injured hockey ...

"I have seen people swarm around you like bees on a honeycomb", says martin to his old friend Jimmy, "what is it that you give them, which makes them like you so much? There certainly must be something interesting they are getting from you, can I get a piece of that too? Please tell me something funny, it could be anything, a story, a joke, a riddle, a phrase, just anything," pleads martin with now reluctant Jimmy, "all right then", replies the latter, just remember that I am no Comedian, hold your ears wide open, and be ready to laugh at anything I do or say, deal or no deal?" "yeah you ...

Almost one year ago, Alice TodHunter Moon left her PathFinder village to become Apprentice to ExtraOrdinary Wizard Septimus Heap. Now, in faraway lands, the Castle is in peril. The brilliant blue stone is crumbling to dust, and both the witch Marisa and the wicked Red Queen have their eyes on the throne. But as Tod sets off on a hazardous journey to find a new Keystone, her life may be in the greatest danger of all. Can she save the Castle while evading the fate that befell her mother?

A Culinary Journey Through History The Celebrity Cookbook explores the truly important question: What on earth did famous people eat? Part cookbook, part comedy, part historical expedition gone slightly off course, this book is your guide to the favourite meals and drinks of emperors, rock stars, poets, pirates, and philosophers—some of whom really should have seen a nutritionist. The Celebrity Cookbook is a no-nonsense, laugh-out-loud collection of the actual (and occasionally ridiculous) favourite meals and drinks of the world’s most famous people—alive, dead, or somewhere in ...

The new Haven Hollow novel is here! Paranormal Women’s Fiction from #1 Amazon bestseller, J.R. Rain, and New York Times bestseller, H.P. Mallory! Hi there! My name is Fifi and I’m a succubus... but I’m hopeless with men and relationships. Yes, a succubus is a type of sex demon, but the first thing you should know about me is that even though I was created to suck the life force from men, I’m actually a nice person. In fact, I can’t stand being a succubus because it goes against every moral fiber of my being. Truth be told, I’m a romantic at heart—all I really want is a loving ...

What can you do when an enemy claims sanctuary in your home? Hester Johnson is no one's favorite person, but when she arrives at Proctor House begging to be hidden, the Proctor family takes her in. When something spooks Hester, she runs away - straight into her killer. Is it coincidence she's left on Isabella's door? The danger has never been greater for Detective Palmer and Isabella needs to protect him, find the murderer, and keep her family's secrets. For fans of Samantha Silver, Amanda M. Lee, and Leighann Dobbs, On a Larkspur is a clever, fast-paced cozy mystery that will keep you ...

Nestled between fast track Ft. Lauderdale and nouveau riche Boca Raton, the once sleepy beach town of Palmetto is plagued by progress. The latest news has Ocean Vista condo board president Stella Sajak and other residents in an uproar. Developers plan to raze the property and put up a glitzy resort. But when Stella says she’ll go to City Hall and fight this to the death, no one thinks to take her statement literally. And when Kate Kennedy begins to investigate the murder, she discovers that this little corner of the sunshine state is cursed with corruption, unsavory characters, and a very...

Paranormal Women’s Fiction from bestsellers JR Rain and HP Mallory! All I wanted to do was go camping. Just to prove to myself that I could erect a tent and spend one night in the middle of BFE with only a few mosquito bites as souvenirs. What I really wasn’t planning on was getting attacked by the biggest… wolf I’ve ever seen—not to mention the fact that wolves have no business being in Louisiana. Fast forward to the wolf attack, and I’m now waking up to the second chapter of my middle-aged life as a vampire. Yep, you heard me right. Last I remembered, I was a forty-two-year-...

Fame and fortune should be good enough for him. I swore never to return to Texas, but my boss insisted I go scout out the next big music talent. I’d argue, but then someone might find out I grew up in a place that was the definition of unsophisticated. Boo. So when I find myself in a backwood, honky-tonk bar, all I want to do is get out of there before someone recognizes me. Of course, my ex-fiancé had to saunter through the door, and right as he took the stage, he totally saw me tip out of my chair. I will never live that down. All I have to do is convince Tyson to take the offer he’d...

Marriage doesn’t have to mean surrender. In Happy Wife, Happy Life: How to Keep Your Wife Happy Without Giving Up Your Manhood, readers are taken on a sharp, witty, and brutally honest journey through the unspoken compromises of modern relationships. From silent standoffs in Pottery Barn to the calendar politics of sex, dinner parties, and in-laws, this unapologetic survival guide for married men exposes how too many husbands are losing their voices—and their socks—in the name of peace. This isn’t another cheerfully neutered relationship manual or feel-good therapy session dressed ...

Gloriana XII--The Original Wolf of Wall Street. In this hilarious sequel to The Mouse That Roared, Grand Fenwick is at it again, this time upsetting the world's economy. The tiny country's secret weapon this time is its Grand Pinot chewing gum. When sales boom during an anti-smoking campaign, Grand Fenwick's investment is suddenly worth millions. In an attempt to rid Grand Fenwick of its crippling budget surplus, Duchess Gloriana XII decides the stock market is the perfect place to lose it all. Instead, she makes millions more and ends up wreaking havoc on the world economy. Never has "the ...

Cheer yourself and others up with the Lawyer Humor Handbook. Excellent resource for ice breaking when you are giving a speech, need a fun gift—especially for a lawyer, or want to lighten up any gathering or celebration. This Handbook compiles the whole gamut of lawyer jokes, stories, puns, court transcripts with lawyer faux pas, and other lawyer witticisms. In this Handbook you’ll find: • 210 Humorous lawyer stories • 62 Courtroom transcripts with lawyer gaffes • 83 Question and answer lawyer jokes • 19 Law school amusements • 38 Punchy puns and word-play bits • 2 Legal ...

PG-Rated Version (The original, unedited version is also available.) "Go Out and Play and Don't Come Home until it's Dark." Growing up in the 70's wasn't easy. No internet or smartphones, video games or HDTV -- nothing but time to kill and the endless potential of a summer day. Only parental threats and a newly-developed sense of right and wrong could steer Johnny Virgil and his two younger brothers away from trouble...or directly into it. Join Johnny on this hilarious and irreverent romp through his childhood as he recounts the stories that made him what he is today - an unimportant cog in...

Meet Ford Foghorn, a ten-year-old with a stinky secret: whenever he farts, he turns into a hideous monster! Get ready to laugh your pants off with Ford Foghorn, a ten-year-old boy with an extraordinary secret: whenever he farts, he transforms into a hideous monster! The Foghorn family is cursed with this bizarre affliction, and they’ve been on the run from the relentless Monster Chasers ever since. Life on the run is all Ford has ever known, thanks to the relentless Monster Chasers. But when his family lands in Mount Methane, things finally start looking up. Ford makes new friends who ...

Years of being a stripper have left me jaded, seeing men as nothing more than walking ATMs with two brain cells - one for their wallet and one for their zipper. That is, until Uri walks into my life. But this heavyweight boxing champion, with a heavy wallet to match his heavy body, is judging me as harshly as I judge men. Note: This is a stand-alone, steamy, fake dating billionaire romance, with character overlap from Short King, Secret Billionaire, and Love Crime. Heavyweight Billionaire was previously published as Stripper Billionaire but it is much changed and much expanded.

It’s another murder in the little town of Roble. But not to worry, Romaine and Auntie Zanne are on it! It’s the 100th Boule of the Distinguished Ladies’ Society of Voodoo Herbalists. They’ve gotten together to eat, drink, be merry and vote for the next Lesser Mambo, a lifetime appointment second only to the Most High (bet you’ll never guess who holds that position). But the second in command spot keeps becoming vacant—that’s because the women who fill it keep dying off. This time though, it looks like murder. During an alcohol-infused dinner and a tall glass full of absinth, a...

DO YOU ABSOLUTELY LOVE CATS?? -- Did you know they played a huge role in British history? Like to know more...? This funny, informative book has tons of fun stories and fascinating trivia that cat lovers can't get enough of... It tells you EVERYTHING you might like to know about how cats shaped British history and culture... DID YOU KNOW? -- Winston Churchill sneaked his cats smoked salmon under the table at state dinners? -- Margaret Thatcher bought her cat sardines in Moscow – during the Cold War? -- The Queen loved to draw cats as a child, but her allergies make her avoid them now? -- ...

A collection of poems—101 to be exact—of the musings of poopings, to which you'll react, with snickering and giggling, while you are hopefully, taking a crap. And each poem here, is presented of course, with an illustration, that'll have you smiling from ear to ear.