Humor Funny

Blind dates can be the romantic equivalent of a nice stroll toward an open manhole... blindfolded. With no romantic prospects in sight, Annika rethinks her dating strategy, ready to chance a few manholes. After all, who knows how God could bring Mr. Right into her life? Her interfering family and friends are itching to play matchmaker, but their choices will have Annika asking, “Where did they dig up these guys?” When sinister gifts appear, her harmless dating scheme becomes a dangerous game. How can she meet Mr. Right, when Mr. Wrong has her in his sights?

Two teens, one cemetery, and an app from hell. Tommy and Billy are just a couple of average high school punks who are about to download a very unaverage app... An app that just might raise the dead. Click BUY NOW or READ FOR FREE!

You’ve read plenty of erotica, but you’ve never read anything like this. This story pokes fun at everything you love about erotica, and will turn you on and also make you laugh. Bailey is a repressed, uptight, and nerdy college student. While her roommates are having fun on a Saturday night, she is in her dorm room, studying alone, just like every weekend. However, she didn’t count on a visit from an alien on a mission, a mission to help her get some action and stop being so uptight. Of course, not just any alien shows up, but a quadrillionaire alien shifter named Christian Gray (note...

The stories in this work include parodies of long-standing genres and original tales of irreverent occurrence. Each story involves humor that neither conforms to political correctness or social standards of good taste. These stories are not for the weak-hearted. These stories are for adults and include profanity, violence, sex, degenerate behavior, and spectacular drama and action. You may even find a moral or two thrown in somewhere amongst them. If you do, it was completely accidental. Found in this esteemed collection are these gems: Lust For Luscious Sherlock Jerkweed and the Case of ...

Texas Tall Tales and Just Flat Out Lies. Now everybody knows that Texas is a big place and Texans are proud of that fact. Everything in Texas is big, at least that’s the way a Texan thinks of it. So by their very nature they are prone to exaggerate, just a little bit. Well, maybe a lot! So for your entertainment you’re going to read a few of those Texas Tall Tales. Now to be truthful you never really know if they’re true or not, but you’ll have to decide that for yourself.

As far back as he can remember James Corden has only ever wanted to be in one place: in front of you, doing something to make you laugh, cry, shout, or giggle uncontrollably. At the age of 4, he grandstanded throughout his baby sister’s christening, standing on a chair in front of the whole congregation, pulling faces and cracking everyone up. Despite himself, the vicar was impressed. And from then on he couldn’t get enough of the spotlight, even when it always seemed to avoid him. Throughout his teens, he and his Dad trudged up and down towards London....

When the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn't for them anymore, it's inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up. It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take good and evil, for example. For them, it's an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.

Can a man be too handsome? In the summer of 1959 “outlandishly handsome” San Francisco resident Ray Corber makes his living moving pianos—all by himself. Put off by women's “ulterior motives,” this 25-year-old Adonis is inclined to avoid emotional entanglements. Then he's recruited to star in a new play: “The Handsomest Man in the World.” Suddenly Ray finds himself the center of attention by the press, his clamoring fans, and even more enraptured females. Can Ray cope with his new celebrity and the complications of an actor's life? Take a wild ride with this “blue-eyed ...

30 Days to Stop Being a Jealous Boyfriend is a unique mindfulness workbook that will help you overcome jealousy and cultivate a more fulfilling relationship with your partner. This 30-day program offers a transformative approach to addressing jealousy and insecurity, with daily exercises that blend mindfulness techniques, cognitive behavioral therapy, and self-reflection. You'll learn how to identify and challenge negative thought patterns, communicate more effectively with your partner, and develop a greater sense of self-awareness and self-worth. This book is part of a series of ...

IT'S THE SCOOP OF A LIFETIME, AND MIGHT JUST SAVE HIS CAREER ... IF THEY DON'T KILL HIM FIRST Portsmouth. England. The 1990s. Meet Llew Sabler, a ferociously ambitious newspaper reporter who'll stop at nothing to reach the top. 'You're meant to write the news, not be the news,' blasts his long-suffering editor, after Llew's latest madcap stunt sparks public outrage. There is only one thing Llew lusts after more than success: his fellow reporter and close friend, the bewitchingly violent Thirza Kirkby. When his oldest pal - serial virgin Emdel Black - steals Thirza's heart, lovesick Llew ...

The Boomer Crew's biggest gamble yet! The lads go to Monaco to make their fortune in the casinos; what’s the worst that could happen? Well, Blakey’s car might get trashed, Finley might lose all his money, Geoff and Daisy might break up and Johnny might not make it back to Blighty. Will their wildest gamble yet pay off – or leave them broke and broken? Double Up or Quit is the third laugh-out-loud installment in Peter Seddon’s cozy crime series, packed with his signature wit and the misadventures of the Boomer Crew – Britain’s unlikeliest criminals. Perfect for fans of The ...

Sophie Sweet is a game programmer who adores three things: writing code; Doritos Surprise, the one thing she can cook; and her ride-or-die BFF Jodie Edwards. And only those three. To Sophie, people are a lousy bunch of jackasses who lie and leave when you need them most, so why bother? That goes double for "love," a ridiculous fairy tale sold to women to keep them subjugated and cooking things besides Doritos Surprise, which is madness. Sophie and Jodie have a tradition of getting their fortunes read at the carnival, but this year there's a new surprise in town-Tiffani the Psychic. The ...

Check your sensibilities at the door and enter a world of side-splitting humor from the master of raunchy jokes! If you enjoyed the first volume of Jokes against Humanity, wait till you read Vol 2! This is real, no-holds-barred, adult humor at its finest! The jokes are not for everyone, especially if you offend easily, but I do hope the rest of you can check your sensibilities long enough to enjoy the wit and humor of these jokes and LOL with me!

Theft, extortion, homicide — there’s no end to the talents of the new men in photographer Sonny Littlefield’s life. Ever since she moved to the strawberry and sheep farm that she inherited from her biological father, her problems have been piling up: her cousins keep robbing her house, she’s rapidly going broke, and she hasn’t had a date in months. Her top priority is figuring out who left a skeleton hand and threatening note in her ramshackle barn. Somebody in Gracious, Maine, is turning human remains into playthings, and it’s all Sonny can do to keep from ending up a pile of ...

PG-Rated Version (The original, unedited version is also available.) "Go Out and Play and Don't Come Home until it's Dark." Growing up in the 70's wasn't easy. No internet or smartphones, video games or HDTV -- nothing but time to kill and the endless potential of a summer day. Only parental threats and a newly-developed sense of right and wrong could steer Johnny Virgil and his two younger brothers away from trouble...or directly into it. Join Johnny on this hilarious and irreverent romp through his childhood as he recounts the stories that made him what he is today - an unimportant cog in...

Perfect the art of Schadenfreude from your own armchair as you wonder who left the lid of the idiot box open. Laugh at the dumb and dumber from the comfort of your own toilet seat. Wonder at the stupidity of man with hilarious anecdotes spanning time and history and culture.

Dru has only 24 hours to save the world. It’s definitely going to be an all-nighter.Being the world’s only crystal sorceress means no vacation time, lousy pay, and zero benefits. But what’s worse? Finding out there actually is another crystal sorceress—who happens to be wickedly powerful and also dead-set on destroying the world. When she breaks into Dru’s shop, sets the place on fire, and steals an apocalyptic amulet, it’s hard not to take things personally. What’s a girl to do? Hit the road in a high-speed chase to get that amulet back before the seas boil, the stars fall ...

The Godhunter Saga heads into a new realm! Married life has proven to be complicated for Vervain Lavine. Maybe it's the pressure of being the last dragon-sidhe in existence, the hope of an entire race of faeries. Or maybe it's the fact that her husband lives in the Faerie Realm where he rules the Kingdom of Fire. Or then again, it could be because he married her after abducting her and stealing her memories of her four other lovers. That's a tough one. He did do a lot to make it up to her though, and she's forgiven Arach but that doesn't mean that the Godhunter is ready to hang up her ...

Connie has had bad luck with coworkers ever since her lemonade stand partners pushed her out at the age of six. In her debut collection of humor essays, Connie provides entertainment with hysterical stories about awkward workplace situations, ridiculous coworkers, and enough happy hour cocktails to make you question her life choices. From low paying high school gigs to “real world” marketing jobs in Chicago, Connie presents stories about life both in and out of the office that will have you laughing out loud in the break room.

Jokes Against Humanity 3 is the third volume in the Jokes Against Humanity series of hilariously funny joke books by M. Harry Ballsych. Leave your sensibilities at the door and enjoy raunchy witty humor by a master joke writer!