Historical Humor

"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains." So begins Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, an expanded edition of the beloved Jane Austen novel featuring all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie mayhem.

1719. Great Britain is at war with Spain. When his mother dies, fourteen year old Dan Leake finds himself alone on the mean streets of Bristol. Faced with starvation or the workhouse, he stows away on a British man-o-war, hoping to find his father who had been pressed into the Royal Navy years before. Falsely accused of theft, Dan is shunned by his shipmates and bullied by the sadistic bosun, as he endures the brutal life aboard an eighteenth century warship. He finally discovers the real thief, and his courage, at the bloody Battle of Cape St. Vincent. At his moment of triumph, he realises...

After a long and eventful life, Allan Karlsson ends up in a nursing home, believing it to be his last stop. The only problem is that he's still in good health, and in one day, he turns 100. A big celebration is in the works, but Allan really isn't interested (and he'd like a bit more control over his vodka consumption). So he decides to escape. He climbs out the window in his slippers and embarks on a hilarious and entirely unexpected journey, involving, among other surprises, a suitcase stuffed with cash.

Senator Jim MacVeagh is proud to serve his country - and his president, Mark Hollenbach, who has a near-spotless reputation as the vibrant, charismatic leader of MacVeagh’s party and the nation. When Hollenbach begins taking MacVeagh into his confidence, the young senator knows his star is on the rise. But then Hollenbach starts summoning MacVeagh in the middle of the night to Camp David. There, the president sits in the dark and rants about his enemies, unfurling insane theories about all the people he says are conspiring against him.

Johannes Cabal, a brilliant scientist and notorious snob, is single-mindedly obsessed in heart and soul with raising the dead. Well, perhaps not soul.... He hastily sold his years ago in order to learn the laws of necromancy. But now, tormented by a dark secret, he travels to the fiery pits of Hell to retrieve it. Satan, who is incredibly bored these days, proposes a little wager: Johannes has one year to persuade 100 people to sign over their souls, or he will be damned forever.

The story opens with our newly married protagonists, Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam Darcy, defending their village from an army of flesh-eating unmentionables. But the honeymoon has barely begun when poor Mr. Darcy is nipped by a rampaging dreadful. Elizabeth knows the proper course of action is to promptly behead her husband (and then burn the corpse, just to be safe). But when she learns of a miracle antidote under development in London, she realizes there may be one last chance to save her true love.

Love got her into this mess—never loving again would get her out. Corinna Victoria Roberts had never been lucky—not in her choice of husband, or her lot in life after the man she’d eloped with had promptly abandoned her, taking her gold and jewels with him. When her husband’s thieving, lawless relatives show up at her door announcing his death and demanding that her late father’s fine dining empire be signed over to them, her life is in danger. She flees to take a position no one expects of her—as a Harvey Girl waitress in New Mexico. Tanner Sterling has hunted his last bounty. ...

In a game of secrets and spies, love ignites between bitter enemies. Lord Buckworth, a renowned libertine, is infamous for his daring exploits and insatiable appetite for risk. But when he rigs a card game to win the services of Frederick Thorndyke, a man with whom he shares a painful past, his devious plans may cost him more than he bargained for. Thorn despises his reckless brother-in-law, who gambles the family fortune away to the brink of financial ruin. Now, sold into service by one of the gambler’s lost wagers, Thorn finds himself in the power of the very man he once loved and lost....

When first published in 1759, Candide became an instant best seller and is now regarded as one of the key texts of the Enlightenment. Voltaire’s preoccupations with evil and with various kinds of human folly and intolerance found a perfect vehicle in this philosophical tale. A master storyteller, he combined often wildly entertaining action with profoundly serious sense, parodying the traditional chivalric and oriental tales with which his public was more familiar.

In July 1890, Vincent van Gogh went into a cornfield and shot himself. Or did he? Why would an artist at the height of his creative powers attempt to take his life... and then walk a mile to a doctor's house for help? Who was the crooked little "color man" Vincent had claimed was stalking him across France? And why had the painter recently become deathly afraid of a certain shade of blue? These are just a few of the questions confronting Vincent's friends who vow to discover the truth of van Gogh's untimely death.

Hermann Kermit Warm is going to die. The enigmatic and powerful man known only as the Commodore has ordered it, and his henchmen, Eli and Charlie Sisters, will make sure of it. Though Eli doesn't share his brother's appetite for whiskey and killing, he's never known anything else. But their prey isn't an easy mark, and on the road from Oregon City to Warm's gold-mining claim outside Sacramento, Eli begins to question what he does for a living - and whom he does it for. With The Sisters Brothers, Patrick deWitt pays homage to the classic Western....

This trilogy about World War II, largely based on his own experiences as an army officer, is the crowning achievement of Evelyn Waugh's career. Its central character is Guy Crouchback, head of an ancient but decayed Catholic family, who at first discovers new purpose in the challenge to defend Christian values against Nazi barbarism, but then gradually finds the complexities and cruelties of war too much for him.

A long time ago in the future, the secret of time travel became known to all. Unsurprisingly, the world nearly ended. There will always be idiots who want to change history. Enter the Time Police. An all-powerful, international organisation tasked with keeping the timeline straight. At all costs. Their success is legendary. The Time Wars are over. But now they must fight to save a very different future - their own. This is the story of Jane, Luke and Matthew - the worst recruits in Time Police history. Or, very possibly, three young people who might change everything.

On April 10, 1912, the Titanic departed England, ultimately bound for America. It famously struck an iceberg along the way, and as the mighty ship went down, it took 1,500 people with it, most of them good-hearted, innocent people. But what of the jerks, losers, weirdos, and malcontents? They were also People of the Titanic. In this comical, fanciful— and completely hypothetical — depiction of life on the Titanic, Shawn Carlow (Jimmy Kimmel Live!, Late Night with Jimmy Fallon) brings to the surface 30 stories of doomed souls who sailed upon that ship of dreams. Revel in the never-before...

Few writers have attempted to explore the natural history of a particular animal by adopting the animal's own sensibility. But Verlyn Klinkenborg, with his deeply empathetic relation to the world around him, has done just that, and done it brilliantly, in Timothy; or Notes of an Abject Reptile.

Never Expected He Would Be the One... but I Had Fantasized. Guess that's the same as wishing! My first time! It’s really going to happen. I want this so bad, but I know it’s too BIG. “It’ll be tight, sweetheart. But we’ll make it fit!” A hot erotic short read. Older Man, Young Woman, Taboo situation, M/F intimacy.

In the fifth adventure in the How to Train Your Dragon series, someone has stolen the Fire-Stone. Now the volcano on Volcano Island has become active and the tremors are hatching the eggs of the Exterminator dragons! Can Hiccup return the Fire-Stone to the Volcano, stop the Volcano from erupting, and save the Tribes from being wiped out by the terrible sword-claws of the Exterminators?

Another Melt Your Eyeballs It’s So Hot Bundle! Be the First to Read Lakelyn Wilder’s Newest Stories! 5 Story Bundle Includes & Bonus: Satisfy Me Deeply First Threesome With My BFF & His Best Friend Going Deep My First Time Plus Two More Wicked Hot Taboo Stories and a Bonus Story: Cherry Popping the Brat!

In this terrifying and hilarious prequel, we witness the genesis of the zombie plague in early 19th-century England. We watch Elizabeth Bennet evolve from a nave young teenager into a savage slayer of the undead. We laugh as she begins her first clumsy training with nunchucks and katana swords and cry when her first blush with romance goes tragically awry.

Walter Starbuck, a career humanist and eventual low-level aide in the Nixon White House, is implicated in Watergate and jailed, after which he (like Howard Campbell in Mother Night) works on his memoirs. Starbuck is innocent (his office was used as a base for the Watergate shenanigans of which he had no knowledge), and yet he is not innocent (he has collaborated with power unquestioningly and served societal order all his life). He represents another Vonnegut Everyman caught amongst forces he neither understands nor can defend.