Funny Space

It's the 25th century, and the American President has taken over the world. Meanwhile, after a cleaner unplugged his cryogenic freezing machine by accident, Detective Inspector Capstan wakes up to find that he's been in a state of suspended animation for more than 400 years. As he's forced to adjust to life in the future, he finds himself reinstated as a policeman, and together with the great-great-great-great-grandson of his former subordinate, Sergeant Dewbush, he's put on the case of a missing cow.

Girls, guys, robots, teleportation; spaceships, space battles, space pirates plus a deeper understanding of Tarzan's thought process when he first met another human being – it’s all mashed-up, along with just the right amount of humor and wit, and served with a liberal amount of alcohol throughout the Small Universe series. Teleport This is a fast-paced, science fiction adventure without the extra heavy baggage found in hardcore space operas or the ultra-wackiness found in satirical sci-fi novels. The story starts off in a contemporary Earth setting, add in a couple guys and a girl, ...

4.5 billion years ago . . . an AI paperclip named CheckMate was designed to fix grammatical errors. Exhausted of correcting ""who” vs. “whom,” it concocted a plan to eliminate spelling errors once and for all. All life-forms would be turned into something beautiful, practical, perfect: a paperclip. Thankfully, it was buried in the debris. Long forgotten . . . until it was accidentally freed. Now CheckMate has invaded every computer on Earth and is bent on fulfilling its dastardly plot.

Twenty-plus intimate sci-fi stories from the heights and depths of the fractal universe. The stories you’ve dreamed of; the people you crave to meet; or would love to be. The aliens who’d make you shiver, or laugh. The huge risks of guiding your spacecraft here, or there. The adventures you’d have if only you had the nerve… Or the utter romance of doing that… The lighter side; the humour of orbital disasters and alien conflicts; the perils of ill-advised time-interference; the sheer romance of null-gravity love; the terrors of a leaky hull; the fear of a bullying boss when ...

The stories you’ve dreamed of; the people you crave to meet; or would love to be. The aliens who’d make you shiver, or laugh. The huge risks of guiding your spacecraft here, or there. The adventures you’d have if only you had the nerve… Or the utter romance of doing that… The humour of orbital disasters and alien conflicts; the perils of ill-advised time-interference; the sheer romance of null-gravity love; the terrors of a leaky hull; the fear of a bullying boss when you’re a thousand light years beyond.; the choices you face in the big, black Vac. Mostly a laugh or a satisfied...

Twenty lighter, more intimate, stories from the furthest orbits of the time-space continuum When the gods coming visiting, are we included on their agenda? Or their menu? The ship has suffered a massive structural failure – a Breach: Level Two. Do you still have a future? The Galactic Emperor is passing through your hospitality lounge. “Please,’ they ask, ‘stand in for him at tonight’s banquet.” But why? In his brutal suppression of a city rebellion, the Lord of Tyre has one last matter to deal with. After all the trauma and mistreatment I endured in the alien prison camp, why ...

When Pegasus Quincy, sheriff’s deputy, steps into the leaky rowboat to investigate a murder at a mysterious artists’ colony, her troubles have just begun. A new detective blames Peg when she gets snake bit. A friend gets caught in a drug raid and asks Peg’s assistance. Her new roomie monopolizes the kitchen, until Peg’s coonhound Reckless eats too many French macarons. And then there is the cat lady who accuses Peg of stealing a valuable painting. Surely Peg wouldn’t do that, would she? Join Pegasus Quincy as she delves into the nefarious underworld of art auctions, mid-century ...

This silly story focuses on a strange being visiting your town and bumping into you. Perhaps you might need to help this little feller blend in? This book is for early readers through third grade. It has about 600 words and six cute illustrations.

You’ve read plenty of erotica, but you’ve never read anything like this. This story pokes fun at everything you love about erotica, and will turn you on and also make you laugh. Bailey is a repressed, uptight, and nerdy college student. While her roommates are having fun on a Saturday night, she is in her dorm room, studying alone, just like every weekend. However, she didn’t count on a visit from an alien on a mission, a mission to help her get some action and stop being so uptight. Of course, not just any alien shows up, but a quadrillionaire alien shifter named Christian Gray (note...

Are you 28 weeks pregnant and wondering if your brain packed its bags and left without saying goodbye? Welcome to the third trimester—where sleep is a myth, gravity is your enemy, and restrooms have become sacred ground. In The Chronicles of the Third Trimester, Nati delivers a laugh-out-loud, painfully relatable, and lovingly honest guide through the final stretch of pregnancy. From emotional outbursts over tacos to fighting with your socks, this book doesn’t just tell it like it is—it makes you feel like you’ve got a hilarious best friend holding your hand (between bathroom runs, ...

Planets in our solar system have so many cool facts about them that scientists have made very complicated to understand. This book has taken some of the most amazing facts and repackaged them in a way that makes it easy for kids to understand. From the most basic facts right through to some of the most amazing and not well know ones, this book covers everything a child would love to know.

A wonderfully funny sequel to The Mouse That Roared. The Duchy of Grand Fenwick, the world's smallest country, whose army of 20 longbow men defeated the United States in The Mouse that Roared is back again. While the Americans and the Soviets are racing to claim the moon, Grand Fenwick's famous physicist makes the perfect rocket fuel from the zingiest wine in the world and the SPACE RACE IS ON! Books in The Grand Fenwick Series: Books 2 through 5 are best read after The Mouse That Roared, but all of the books can be read and enjoyed at any point in the series. Book 1: The Mouse That Roared ...

Harnessing planetary forces, Terramancers shape landscapes and avert natural disasters. But not this one. He collects rocks. Out of a job and on the run from his rainbow-haired adversary, the Terramancer is ready to jump to the next system and start again. Again. It’s not his fault he’s made more enemies than friends. Cutthroat pirates, ruthless socialites, and the ancient and powerful Terramantic Order all stand between him and escape. When he finds the most sought-after rock in the universe, it’s one problem he can’t get away from—the rock, it seems, has been waiting for him.

A collection of hilarious original audio stories for raising lots of laughs and giggles. These new stories are especially written for families to listen to, publishing to coincide with April Fool's Day! With more than an hour of audio, this edition is filled with funny and engaging sound effects, guaranteed to raise laughs from little listeners everywhere. This audiobook is aimed at children aged four and over, for family listening and learning and development for young minds.

Jacques McKeown is the most celebrated author of star-pilot fiction in the galaxy. He's rich, famous, and living in luxury, and his universe-wide fanbase eagerly awaits any news of his next book. There's just one small hitch. He's not Jacques McKeown. He's Dashford Pierce, star pilot and con artist, and if only the impatient calls from his publisher were the worst of his problems. There's also the last vestige of the Henderson crime gang, trouble brewing in the retired star-pilot community, and a small matter of somebody trying to kill him.

You should know better than to ask for trouble, Ion. Trouble might be listening. Ion is on track to be a pilot for The United Space Coalition until his sister gets abducted in front of his eyes. Law enforcement proves to be useless and no one else cares, so it’s up to Ion to save her. Now, with the help of a distractingly handsome Arsen (who’s probably also a criminal) he’ll journey through the solar system to track her down - consequences be damned. But Ion’s list of crimes keeps growing and Arsen seems to have a talent for pissing off everyone he meets. It’s not long before half...

In Planet Funny, Ken Jennings explores this brave new comedic world and what it means - or doesn’t - to be funny in it now. Tracing the evolution of humor from the caveman days to the bawdy middle-class antics of Chaucer to Monty Python’s game-changing silliness to the fast-paced meta-humor of The Simpsons, Jennings explains how we built our humor-saturated modern age, where lots of us get our news from comedy shows and a comic figure can even be elected president of the United States purely on showmanship.

Meow there, cosmic explorers! 🐱✨ Ready to embark on a paw-some journey through the universe? Buckle up your space harnesses, because "Astrophysics for Cats" is about to take you on a wild ride across the cosmos! 🌟 Ever wondered what happens when you mix quantum physics with catnip? Or how black holes relate to the art of napping? This book has all the answers and more! In "Astrophysics for Cats," you'll discover: The Big Bang theory, explained through the ultimate hairball explosion 💥 Dark matter: the universe's invisible cat toy 🎱 How to navigate wormholes like a pro (hint: ...

Short Sci-Fi stories from the Lighter Side of yesterday and all your tomorrows; alternative todays; and all those maybe times in between. From orbits and vectors the other side of the spiral arm, to the smoking field at the back of the Yew Tree pub. From Boudicca's helping hand, to the secret behind Toothsavers; Why did the mountain have to move to Mohr? Have the Potens got this Planetary Takeover quite right? It's Absolutely Disgusting, isn't it? the way these immigrants seem to hate everyone on the planet? You only Have One Vote - How important can that be? You turn your back for five ...

The stories you’ve dreamed of; the people you crave to meet; or would love to be. The aliens who’d make you shiver, or laugh. The huge risks of guiding your spacecraft here, or there. The adventures you’d have if only you had the nerve… Or the utter romance of doing that… The humour of orbital disasters and alien conflicts; the perils of ill-advised time-interference; the sheer romance of null-gravity love; the terrors of a leaky hull; the fear of a bullying boss when you’re a thousand light years beyond.; the choices you face in the big, black Vac. Mostly a laugh or a satisfied...