Funny Southern

Do you want to join the ranks of the Intergalactic Diplomatic Corp. but don't know what to do? This book is for you. Learn all the tips and tricks for dealing with aliens across the universe. Start your new career now in the intergalactic diplomatic corp.

Cassie and Elvis have Magnolia Bay's boardwalk purring like a kitten with fresh cream. With her bookstore thriving and friends by her side, Cassie's newest pride and joy are a pair of fall boots that don't just make folks green with envy—they're brimming with a magic only she knows about. Will they be enough to help her solve the latest murder in Magnolia Bay? The holiday weekend takes a dark turn when a local mom is found murdered. With secrets buried deeper than treasure and an investigation ally spilling them recklessly, danger's now tailing Cassie and her crew like a shadow on a hot ...

"Maggie Aldrich will have you laughing till your side hurts all while keeping you on the edge of your seat in this action-packed, page turning small town cozy mystery!" - CarolAnn Williams - Booksprout Upon moving back to small town America, the last thing newbie reporter Jackie Robinson expects to discover is a dead body. And not just any dead body. Local football legend and popular native son Barry Bartmore - the "King" of Saddle Creek. Much to the chagrin of Officer Tony Torres, her first unrequited crush, Jackie puts on her reporter's hat and takes the case. She’s determined to write ...

A sunny murder mystery set in a Southern California beach town. Chelsea and Ella are two coffee shop workers just trying to prosper in a coastal community. Unfortunately, bodies start to drop on their bit of beach. The two start to pick apart the local secrets in their newfound and sometimes hilarious approach to sleuthing. But their findings are so serious that the police worry for their safety. Can our baristas find the killer without getting burned? Expanded from the previously published Beach Reaper (Episodes 1-20) on Kindle Vella.

Southern matriarch Lillian Summer Fairview is settling right nice into prison, until Big Martha, the toughest broad on the cellblock, comes asking for a favor. Her niece has fallen for a guy she met online, and Martha’s convinced Mr. Too-Good-To-Be-True is up to no good. All Lil’s friends have to do is investigate the guy and report back. Will these amateur sleuths be able to track down the elusive Romeo in the scam-filled world of online dating without alerting the local police to their shenanigans, or will they find themselves in trouble right up to their granny panties?

PLEASE NOTE- SNAPSHOTS IS NOT A PHOTO BOOK! Matthew Lightfoot attempted to write a book while travelling the world, using thirty years of travel snapshots to jog his memory. His present day adventures take us on a campervan journey across New Zealand, to being castaway on a Fijian Island, then from the mysterious nation of Paraguay, across the high Andes by bus to South America's Pacific coast. Along the way, a series of long forgotten images lead us on a photographic exploration of the author's past adventures around the world. Lightfoot attracts incidents and his tales embark on a fast-...

This is a two-volume ebook edition of Doreen and Ken Tonks’ amusing, down-to-earth books about their life in southern Spain. Please see individual titles for descriptions and reviews.

Dubious diamond devotees and a dead loan shark. With the dad she thought dead suspected of murder, can she keep him from doing hard time? Elizabeth Trout thinks she must have rocks in her head. After receiving a crazy call that the father she never knew is cooling his heels in the local jail, the newlywed graphic designer posts bail and invites him home. But the family reunion loses its luster when she learns her old man is under suspicion for murder after he was found near a corpse. With the sheriff zeroing in on her dad and no other suspects on ice, Elizabeth starts her own investigation ...

Amy Kate Anderson is Southern trouble in high heels. A Fire— A Murder— What’s happened to her quiet little town of Pine Lake? Book shop owner, Amy Kate Anderson, thought she was having the worse day ever … until they wheeled a body out of the coffee shop next door and her friend, Matt Murphy, co-owner of the Beans and Leaves, became the number one suspect for the DA. Can Amy Kate find a way to help her friend and keep her dreams for her bookshop from going up in smoke? Or will the handsome Lieutenant Gabe Cooper have his way and leave Amy Kate fishing for clues among the ashes? In ...

The Sweet Potato Queens like men. They like them so much that they have devoted an absolutely inordinate amount of time to the pursuit of men, marriage, and great sex. And then, when that doesn't work out, they've devoted an inordinate amount of time to divorce, gittin another one and having great sex with him instead. The Sweet Potato Queens' Field Guide to Men is the Queens manifesto on all matters of the heart, featuring tales from Queens around the world, plus the continuing adventures of the women you've come to know and love (and envy just a little bit).

Hot men, sweet tea, juicy gossip, and good friends. That’s what you’ll find in Willowdale, North Carolina. This box set includes the first three Willowdale short stories that preclude No Foolin’, the first novel in the Willowdale series. Stories include: “A Fine How-De-Do,” “A Little Hanky-Panky,” and “A Perfect Setup.” “A Fine How-De-Do” Short story #1. 17,000 words. It’s been a bad month for Tonya Garcia. After her beloved nonna died, her boyfriend's only sympathy involved big plans for spending her inheritance. Now that he’s out of the picture, Tonya needs a new...

From Publishers Weekly In his third installment (after A Short History of a Small Place and Off for the Sweet Hereafter of hilarious adventures narrated by young Louis Benfield of Neely, N.C., Pearson again spins a rollicking yarn with somber undertones and reveals himself to be a shrewd social commentator. Essentially the chronicle of the pursuit of a stolen Chevrolet that ends with the murder of a black man, the kernel of the story is embroidered on, digressed from, told and retold with deepening significance each time. Everything that goes on in the real worldincluding the sordid and the...

Eastbourne or Bust A not-at-all-serious account of one man, one bike, and the long, painful road to the coast. Ever thought cycling the South Downs Way would be a charming, leisurely jaunt through scenic countryside? Yeah, so did I. Idiot. What actually happened was a four-day, mud-splattered odyssey of mechanical failures, chalky cliffside death slides, possessed bike saddles, and a surprising number of historical detours involving Romans, smugglers, haunted windmills and at least one overly dramatic Victorian tunnel. Armed with questionable fitness, a half-functioning bicycle, and the ...

A small-town bachelor. A big-city therapist. A second chance at love in the most unexpected place. John “Tater” Davidson is Dent County’s favorite loudmouth. Known for fixing cars, quoting scripture between swear words, and making people laugh until they cry, he hides a bruised heart behind every joke. After being cheated on and divorced not even 90 days after getting hitched, Tater's done with love—and no one blames him. So when a mental health clinic opens just outside town, and the woman leading it turns out to be his ex-girlfriend from years ago—the one who left without saying...

At a dinner for Swami Schwartz, the founder of the Palmetto Beach Yoga Institute, the food is fabulous and the dancing is delightful. That is, until Swami two-steps all over Kate Kennedy’s new shoes and then keels over dead after someone spikes his double espresso with cyanide. Who could have poisoned the yogi? Now Kate has to team up with her best friend Marlene to sort through suspects, including a shady business partner and a pretty yoga student—who may have shared more than a lotus position with Swami. - - - - - - - - - - - - - DEATH OF THE SWAMI SCHWARTZ by Noreen Wald A Henery ...

Can this swoon-worthy hero turn Dani's dreams into reality? Sure, Wade Spencer is easy on the eyes, has that Southern charm, and comes from a good family, but Dani has been burned by the like before and she’s not fool enough to try it again. But her little girl sees a potential daddy. Seeing how Wade showers her daughter with all the love the girl’s father has denied her, Dani can’t help but warm up to the idea of giving love another try. Wade has a lot going on—a mother with a life-threatening illness to look after, four younger siblings to keep in line, and a farm to run. That ...

They’ve dedicated their lives to saving others, but can they save themselves? Seventeen years ago, they met while doing emergency response work following Hurricane Rita. Maybe it was adrenaline that brought them together, maybe it was love, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t meant to be. They lived in different parts of the world. They agreed to share one night, then went their separate ways. Dr. Clara Bownton has spent her entire medical career saving people’s lives and she’s always had a soft spot for Texas. But the years of traveling to disaster sites and war zones have worn her ...

A Paranormal Women’s Mystery Novel! Alyssa Anderson has a fairly normal life in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. That is, until two things happen nearly simultaneously: First, she gets laid off from a job she loves. Second, visions of a missing little girl begin haunting her sleeping and waking hours. A little girl, it tuns out, who's gone missing in Alyssa's home town. Out of work and plagued by these visions, Alyssa returns home to Georgia to reconnect with friends and family...and to help search for the missing girl. There, she makes several startling discoveries about herself, her ...

Zara Bloom’s got 230K followers, a scruffy bay rescue horse named Chaos Theory, and a knack for turning dressage into a millennial TikTok empire—until her bourbon-soaked train wreck of a mom, Darla, crashes the Barn Burners Gala with a thermos of “tea” and a pyrotechnic disaster that’d make a gator blush. Southern Grace Stables was supposed to woo investors with classy demos and a fake fire, not erupt into a glitter-gargling, swamp-siren shitshow featuring Darla’s line-dancing chaos, a rogue chopper pilot named Remy, and a kid who thinks “Auntie Darla” is a superhero. Now ...

Sheriff Gus knows it’s going to be a bad week when he sees Sedric Hedgecock’s breathalyzer score. With a blood alcohol level of 0.62 percent, Hedgecock should be dead. If the breathalyzer’s isn’t on the fritz, Hedgecock’s superhuman. Either way, he’s blind drunk, so off to the county jail he goes. Joining the wannabe Bacchus in Gus’s cells is Jennifer Louis Bachman, awaiting extradition to Kansas on a murder charge. The victim in question is Jennifer’s unborn child, and the murder weapon is an illegal Mexican abortion. With the governor vacillating on whether to extradite, ...