Funny Southern

Zara Bloom’s got 230K followers, a scruffy bay rescue horse named Chaos Theory, and a knack for turning dressage into a millennial TikTok empire—until her bourbon-soaked train wreck of a mom, Darla, crashes the Barn Burners Gala with a thermos of “tea” and a pyrotechnic disaster that’d make a gator blush. Southern Grace Stables was supposed to woo investors with classy demos and a fake fire, not erupt into a glitter-gargling, swamp-siren shitshow featuring Darla’s line-dancing chaos, a rogue chopper pilot named Remy, and a kid who thinks “Auntie Darla” is a superhero. Now ...

A small-town bachelor. A big-city therapist. A second chance at love in the most unexpected place. John “Tater” Davidson is Dent County’s favorite loudmouth. Known for fixing cars, quoting scripture between swear words, and making people laugh until they cry, he hides a bruised heart behind every joke. After being cheated on and divorced not even 90 days after getting hitched, Tater's done with love—and no one blames him. So when a mental health clinic opens just outside town, and the woman leading it turns out to be his ex-girlfriend from years ago—the one who left without saying...

Cassie and Elvis have Magnolia Bay's boardwalk purring like a kitten with fresh cream. With her bookstore thriving and friends by her side, Cassie's newest pride and joy are a pair of fall boots that don't just make folks green with envy—they're brimming with a magic only she knows about. Will they be enough to help her solve the latest murder in Magnolia Bay? The holiday weekend takes a dark turn when a local mom is found murdered. With secrets buried deeper than treasure and an investigation ally spilling them recklessly, danger's now tailing Cassie and her crew like a shadow on a hot ...

Kate and her best friend Marlene are attending the Palmetto Beach Flea Market in hopes of selling Marlene’s collection of 1950s memorabilia. Fortunately, a table has become available in the busy corridor just outside the circus tent. Unfortunately, the vacant table’s previous occupant died from electrocution when a television set took a dive into his bathtub. The police suspect foul play. And Kate suspects nearly every seller who had a table near the victim—and a motive to put him out of business. - - - - - - - - - - - - - DEATH IS A BARGAIN by Noreen Wald A Henery Press Mystery. If ...

It’s another murder in the little town of Roble. But not to worry, Romaine and Auntie Zanne are on it! It’s the 100th Boule of the Distinguished Ladies’ Society of Voodoo Herbalists. They’ve gotten together to eat, drink, be merry and vote for the next Lesser Mambo, a lifetime appointment second only to the Most High (bet you’ll never guess who holds that position). But the second in command spot keeps becoming vacant—that’s because the women who fill it keep dying off. This time though, it looks like murder. During an alcohol-infused dinner and a tall glass full of absinth, a...

Luck had never been on Tangie Thomas’s side! If it had, then she wouldn’t be selling her so-called “lucky charms” to the unsuspecting townsfolk of Clio, Alabama. And believe-you-me, she’d much rather be doing just about anything else. But, what could she do when her luck was so bad it cost her job after job until she was left with nothing but her charming personality and a few pretty baubles? She’d opened her business, Charmed, I’m Sure, right out of her ancient, bewitched purse! And she’d been just naive enough to think things were starting to look up for her when lo-and-...

The largest collection of Southern proverbs, threats and insults - translated. Each saying is categorized and annotated with alternative sayings, explanations, facts, or similar quotes from famous people. Warning: this book could be fatal to unconverted Yankees.

The Mayor’s Missing Message A Birdie Lou Baxter Mystery – Book Two In the charming Southern town of Haven Hills, where sweet tea flows and gossip travels faster than high-speed fiber, Birdie Lou Baxter just wants a smooth installation job. But when her crew uncovers a decades-old confession tape hidden inside the walls of the mayor’s historic home—and the newly elected mayor vanishes the very next day—Birdie finds herself tangled in a web of long-buried secrets, political cover-ups, and a scandal that threatens to rewrite the town’s history. With the help of her loyal dispatch ...

They’ve dedicated their lives to saving others, but can they save themselves? Seventeen years ago, they met while doing emergency response work following Hurricane Rita. Maybe it was adrenaline that brought them together, maybe it was love, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t meant to be. They lived in different parts of the world. They agreed to share one night, then went their separate ways. Dr. Clara Bownton has spent her entire medical career saving people’s lives and she’s always had a soft spot for Texas. But the years of traveling to disaster sites and war zones have worn her ...

FROM THE FOREWORD BY MILLIE STEVENTON My Uncle Stan was a grumpy man when he began to write to me from Spain and he can’t be said to have mellowed much with age. This book contains only his letters to me, as his old-school habit of always referring to my missives removes the need to include my supportive, and sometimes censorious, replies which possess little of the descriptive power and mostly unintentional humour of his own copious correspondence. In a way I suppose that in the last few years I have been his only constant and empathic contact with the rest of humanity and this first ...

THE RYO LODGE is an outrageous comedy/drama that takes place in 1969 in the sleepy, yet strange town of Cowchip Alabama. It is the story of a criminal with a dream, driven from his lair in Tennessee, who winds up in old Cowchip town. This character driven story of one criminal's desire to rule them all is so rich in characters and description that you'll wonder if Cowchip is real...and you wouldn't be the first. The hero, Norm, (No relation to the author) who himself is a Yankee, comes to Cowchip in the dead of the night and sets about to build the greatest crime organization the world has ...

A mishap while tree-poaching leaves beer-swilling Virginia lumberjack Donnie Huff well and truly dead -- until some furious pounding on his body snatches him back from the other side with no ill effects to speak of. His devout mother-in-law, Opal Criner, is convinced his recovery is nothing less than a miracle -- and a potentially profitable one at that. With a few of Opal's valuable lessons in preacherly manners, Donnie is soon ready to spread Jesus' divine word . . . though he's not quite sure he was listening when the Savior said it.

A Paranormal Women’s Mystery Novel! Alyssa Anderson has a fairly normal life in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. That is, until two things happen nearly simultaneously: First, she gets laid off from a job she loves. Second, visions of a missing little girl begin haunting her sleeping and waking hours. A little girl, it tuns out, who's gone missing in Alyssa's home town. Out of work and plagued by these visions, Alyssa returns home to Georgia to reconnect with friends and family...and to help search for the missing girl. There, she makes several startling discoveries about herself, her ...

From Publishers Weekly In his third installment (after A Short History of a Small Place and Off for the Sweet Hereafter of hilarious adventures narrated by young Louis Benfield of Neely, N.C., Pearson again spins a rollicking yarn with somber undertones and reveals himself to be a shrewd social commentator. Essentially the chronicle of the pursuit of a stolen Chevrolet that ends with the murder of a black man, the kernel of the story is embroidered on, digressed from, told and retold with deepening significance each time. Everything that goes on in the real worldincluding the sordid and the...

Welcome to Angel Falls, a deep-south small town in the heart of L.A. (That’s Lower Alabama, y’all.) Injury shatters Casey Alexander’s dream of becoming a prima ballerina, so she opens a dance studio in her home town of Angel Falls. Among her students are the daughters of her high-school sweetheart Ben and his wife Melody, Casey’s ex-best friend. Witnessing Ben and Melody’s happy-ever-after on a weekly basis fuels her determination to find someone of her own to love. But eligible men are scarce as hen’s teeth in the quaint little town on the backside of nowhere. Until a sexy ...

PLEASE NOTE- SNAPSHOTS IS NOT A PHOTO BOOK! Matthew Lightfoot attempted to write a book while travelling the world, using thirty years of travel snapshots to jog his memory. His present day adventures take us on a campervan journey across New Zealand, to being castaway on a Fijian Island, then from the mysterious nation of Paraguay, across the high Andes by bus to South America's Pacific coast. Along the way, a series of long forgotten images lead us on a photographic exploration of the author's past adventures around the world. Lightfoot attracts incidents and his tales embark on a fast-...

This is a two-volume ebook edition of Doreen and Ken Tonks’ amusing, down-to-earth books about their life in southern Spain. Please see individual titles for descriptions and reviews.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ “Great series of books! Martha and Helen are new friends who now work together in a business concerning old books and manuscripts. Each book has two stories going on, but both end up related. This series has so many different kinds of characters, locations, and conclusions. It is very creative set of stories! I'm sure that you will enjoy all five books. Happy Reading!!!" -- Margaret L. A DELIGHTFUL COZY MYSTERY FULL OF QUAINT VILLAGES, QUIRKY CHARACTERS, AND MADCAP ADVENTURES BY A BESTSELLING AUTHOR. Helen Ryes and Martha Littleword, two Americans living in England, become...

A sunny murder mystery set in a Southern California beach town. Chelsea and Ella are two coffee shop workers just trying to prosper in a coastal community. Unfortunately, bodies start to drop on their bit of beach. The two start to pick apart the local secrets in their newfound and sometimes hilarious approach to sleuthing. But their findings are so serious that the police worry for their safety. Can our baristas find the killer without getting burned? Expanded from the previously published Beach Reaper (Episodes 1-20) on Kindle Vella.

(THE TONKS IN SPAIN containing SETTLING IN SPAIN and PROSPERING IN SPAIN is now also on sale at a reduced price.) Ken E. Tonks, husband of the celebrated travel writer Doreen B. Tonks, has finally put pen to paper to give his version of their first months in Spain, before recording the exciting events of the following spring and summer. Ken, usually a man of few words, bares his soul in this eventful narrative set on and around the Costa del Sol. His budding friendship with Fede the artist proves to be his passport into a life far removed from the insular expat community, and the singular ...