Funny Southern

Do you want to join the ranks of the Intergalactic Diplomatic Corp. but don't know what to do? This book is for you. Learn all the tips and tricks for dealing with aliens across the universe. Start your new career now in the intergalactic diplomatic corp.

"Maggie Aldrich will have you laughing till your side hurts all while keeping you on the edge of your seat in this action-packed, page turning small town cozy mystery!" - CarolAnn Williams - Booksprout Upon moving back to small town America, the last thing newbie reporter Jackie Robinson expects to discover is a dead body. And not just any dead body. Local football legend and popular native son Barry Bartmore - the "King" of Saddle Creek. Much to the chagrin of Officer Tony Torres, her first unrequited crush, Jackie puts on her reporter's hat and takes the case. She’s determined to write ...

A sunny murder mystery set in a Southern California beach town. Chelsea and Ella are two coffee shop workers just trying to prosper in a coastal community. Unfortunately, bodies start to drop on their bit of beach. The two start to pick apart the local secrets in their newfound and sometimes hilarious approach to sleuthing. But their findings are so serious that the police worry for their safety. Can our baristas find the killer without getting burned? Expanded from the previously published Beach Reaper (Episodes 1-20) on Kindle Vella.

PLEASE NOTE- SNAPSHOTS IS NOT A PHOTO BOOK! Matthew Lightfoot attempted to write a book while travelling the world, using thirty years of travel snapshots to jog his memory. His present day adventures take us on a campervan journey across New Zealand, to being castaway on a Fijian Island, then from the mysterious nation of Paraguay, across the high Andes by bus to South America's Pacific coast. Along the way, a series of long forgotten images lead us on a photographic exploration of the author's past adventures around the world. Lightfoot attracts incidents and his tales embark on a fast-...

Dubious diamond devotees and a dead loan shark. With the dad she thought dead suspected of murder, can she keep him from doing hard time? Elizabeth Trout thinks she must have rocks in her head. After receiving a crazy call that the father she never knew is cooling his heels in the local jail, the newlywed graphic designer posts bail and invites him home. But the family reunion loses its luster when she learns her old man is under suspicion for murder after he was found near a corpse. With the sheriff zeroing in on her dad and no other suspects on ice, Elizabeth starts her own investigation ...

Welcome to Madison, Georgia, where the magnolias bloom, the tea is sweet, and the monsters are real. In this cozy horror anthology, the charming town of Madison hides secrets in its flowerbeds and shadows in its attics. Behind every wrought-iron fence and sun-warmed porch lies something unexpected: a banshee who quilts in the carriage house, a wight who prefers crossword puzzles to haunting, a wendigo who wears sweaters by the fire, and cryptids who just want someone to talk to. But don’t be fooled by the cobblestone streets and Southern charm. The ghouls here are real and love has a ...

Amy Kate Anderson is Southern trouble in high heels. A Fire— A Murder— What’s happened to her quiet little town of Pine Lake? Book shop owner, Amy Kate Anderson, thought she was having the worse day ever … until they wheeled a body out of the coffee shop next door and her friend, Matt Murphy, co-owner of the Beans and Leaves, became the number one suspect for the DA. Can Amy Kate find a way to help her friend and keep her dreams for her bookshop from going up in smoke? Or will the handsome Lieutenant Gabe Cooper have his way and leave Amy Kate fishing for clues among the ashes? In ...

Hot men, sweet tea, juicy gossip, and good friends. That’s what you’ll find in Willowdale, North Carolina. This box set includes the first three Willowdale short stories that preclude No Foolin’, the first novel in the Willowdale series. Stories include: “A Fine How-De-Do,” “A Little Hanky-Panky,” and “A Perfect Setup.” “A Fine How-De-Do” Short story #1. 17,000 words. It’s been a bad month for Tonya Garcia. After her beloved nonna died, her boyfriend's only sympathy involved big plans for spending her inheritance. Now that he’s out of the picture, Tonya needs a new...

Southern matriarch Lillian Summer Fairview is settling right nice into prison, until Big Martha, the toughest broad on the cellblock, comes asking for a favor. Her niece has fallen for a guy she met online, and Martha’s convinced Mr. Too-Good-To-Be-True is up to no good. All Lil’s friends have to do is investigate the guy and report back. Will these amateur sleuths be able to track down the elusive Romeo in the scam-filled world of online dating without alerting the local police to their shenanigans, or will they find themselves in trouble right up to their granny panties?

The Sweet Potato Queens like men. They like them so much that they have devoted an absolutely inordinate amount of time to the pursuit of men, marriage, and great sex. And then, when that doesn't work out, they've devoted an inordinate amount of time to divorce, gittin another one and having great sex with him instead. The Sweet Potato Queens' Field Guide to Men is the Queens manifesto on all matters of the heart, featuring tales from Queens around the world, plus the continuing adventures of the women you've come to know and love (and envy just a little bit).

A small-town bachelor. A big-city therapist. A second chance at love in the most unexpected place. John “Tater” Davidson is Dent County’s favorite loudmouth. Known for fixing cars, quoting scripture between swear words, and making people laugh until they cry, he hides a bruised heart behind every joke. After being cheated on and divorced not even 90 days after getting hitched, Tater's done with love—and no one blames him. So when a mental health clinic opens just outside town, and the woman leading it turns out to be his ex-girlfriend from years ago—the one who left without saying...

Eastbourne or Bust A not-at-all-serious account of one man, one bike, and the long, painful road to the coast. Ever thought cycling the South Downs Way would be a charming, leisurely jaunt through scenic countryside? Yeah, so did I. Idiot. What actually happened was a four-day, mud-splattered odyssey of mechanical failures, chalky cliffside death slides, possessed bike saddles, and a surprising number of historical detours involving Romans, smugglers, haunted windmills and at least one overly dramatic Victorian tunnel. Armed with questionable fitness, a half-functioning bicycle, and the ...

This is a two-volume ebook edition of Doreen and Ken Tonks’ amusing, down-to-earth books about their life in southern Spain. Please see individual titles for descriptions and reviews.

They’ve dedicated their lives to saving others, but can they save themselves? Seventeen years ago, they met while doing emergency response work following Hurricane Rita. Maybe it was adrenaline that brought them together, maybe it was love, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t meant to be. They lived in different parts of the world. They agreed to share one night, then went their separate ways. Dr. Clara Bownton has spent her entire medical career saving people’s lives and she’s always had a soft spot for Texas. But the years of traveling to disaster sites and war zones have worn her ...

A Paranormal Women’s Mystery Novel! Alyssa Anderson has a fairly normal life in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. That is, until two things happen nearly simultaneously: First, she gets laid off from a job she loves. Second, visions of a missing little girl begin haunting her sleeping and waking hours. A little girl, it tuns out, who's gone missing in Alyssa's home town. Out of work and plagued by these visions, Alyssa returns home to Georgia to reconnect with friends and family...and to help search for the missing girl. There, she makes several startling discoveries about herself, her ...

Zara Bloom’s got 230K followers, a scruffy bay rescue horse named Chaos Theory, and a knack for turning dressage into a millennial TikTok empire—until her bourbon-soaked train wreck of a mom, Darla, crashes the Barn Burners Gala with a thermos of “tea” and a pyrotechnic disaster that’d make a gator blush. Southern Grace Stables was supposed to woo investors with classy demos and a fake fire, not erupt into a glitter-gargling, swamp-siren shitshow featuring Darla’s line-dancing chaos, a rogue chopper pilot named Remy, and a kid who thinks “Auntie Darla” is a superhero. Now ...

A Feast of Freedom is a brilliant spoof of international affairs--an irresistible blend of humor and satire that is as delightful, as timely, and as deliciously cunning as The Mouse That Roared. While visiting cannibals on a small South Pacific island, the Vice President gets into a stew--literally--causing an international incident that only Leonard Wibberley could concoct. PRAISE FOR A FEAST OF FREEDOM: "Another wildly funny, enormously readable, strangely applicable novel from the pen of a gifted writer."--The Los Angeles Times "A Feast of Freedom must certainly be put along side The ...

Sheriff Gus knows it’s going to be a bad week when he sees Sedric Hedgecock’s breathalyzer score. With a blood alcohol level of 0.62 percent, Hedgecock should be dead. If the breathalyzer’s isn’t on the fritz, Hedgecock’s superhuman. Either way, he’s blind drunk, so off to the county jail he goes. Joining the wannabe Bacchus in Gus’s cells is Jennifer Louis Bachman, awaiting extradition to Kansas on a murder charge. The victim in question is Jennifer’s unborn child, and the murder weapon is an illegal Mexican abortion. With the governor vacillating on whether to extradite, ...

Thurnscoe, South Yorkshire, England, 1944. The pit village awakens with the dawn – a tapestry of terraced houses, each brick etched with stories of endurance. The war may scar the landscape, but it cannot extinguish the spirit of this down-to-earth working-class community, forged in coal and grit. The war casts its shadow, yet life persists. On Deightonby Street three friends in their thirties navigate the highs and lows of life, love, conflicts, neighbours, children, and the formidable Doris Price. Will happily married Lucy Hobson give in to her mutual passionate feelings for her ...

He forecasts the weather on TV to the delight of his many fans. But the residents of Ocean Vista Condominiums are less fond of Uncle Weatherwise—the newest arrival at the condo—especially when a hurricane that he predicted would bypass Palmetto Beach instead heads straight for their town. The morning after a frantic evacuation, Kate Kennedy is blown away when she stumbles upon the corpse of Uncle Weatherwise, with a sharpened weather vane pointed in the direction of his heart. Suddenly Kate’s neighbors are her suspects, from a retired Rockette to a former federal prosecutor to a man ...