Funny Shorts

SWITCH BACK is a novella (about 1/3 of a full-length novel, about 4-5 times longer than a short story) and takes place prior to BOARD STIFF (Elliott Lisbon Mystery #1). After inheriting an entire town, Ballantyne Foundation Director, Elliott Lisbon, travels to Texas to thank them. She quickly learns they don’t want her gratitude, they want their town back. And they’re willing to kill for it. Trapped in a small town full of big suspects, Elliott must unlock their secrets, or she’ll never get out alive. Now doesn’t that sound like fun? Read the whole series and gets even better. - - -...

En la selva tropical, la temporada de tormentas había iniciado La Señora Araña para ella y su hijo, refugio había buscado. El temporal estaba muy ventoso; truenos y lluvia caían En su casa, bajo las rocas, calientes y secos estarían.

From the author of Aevalorn Tales comes a dark fantasy story about self-discovery. Lured by the promise of treasure, Gammond Brandyford, a halfling with a knack for trouble, takes Vongur, a dwarven companion whose soul is trapped within an amulet, to a sacred sanctuary hidden in the mountains. In all truthfulness, Vongur might be looking for a connection to his past, but Gammond only wants a quick buck. Still, at the sanctuary, Gammond must defeat its steadfast guardian to acquire the memories Vongur’s been searching for. Together, they confront a challenge that tests their courage and ...

From the author of Aevalorn Tales comes a story about the power of words, deception and subterfuge, and helping out an old friend. When esteemed emissary Ser Roham Baz falls victim to a mysterious curse that twists his words, it's up to his loyal friend, Joliver Barleywood, the clever Halfling Bard of the Aevalorn Parishes, to unravel the mystery. Joliver must use his cunning tongue to root out those who cursed Ser Roham, undo Roham’s affliction, and save the kingdom from falling into war. Set amid diplomatic negotiations fraught with tension and deceit, The Taunting Tongue weaves ...

I came home to disappear. I didn’t plan on being seen. Going off the radar should be simple for a guy who makes a living pretending to be other people. But hiding in my hometown of Kilt Valley—disguised, renamed, and dodging my very recognizable face—that’s turning out to be the role of a lifetime. No cameras. No red carpets. Just me, a borrowed name, and two weeks to prove I can go invisible before my next movie. What I didn’t count on was Maren—a documentary filmmaker with too much heart and a camera she’s not afraid to use. She doesn’t know who I really am. At least, I ...

A writer whose column appears in the Chattanoogan.com. Stacey's whimsical ways are guaranteed to tweak a funny bone on the coldest cadaver in the land — from amateur sleuth stories to historic political re-retellings. A book of short stories.

Follow the adventures of Chomps the shark. Chomps is a very friendly and adventurous shark. He enjoys swimming in the cold ocean. He has done this every day of his life. However, he does get bored doing the same thing over and over again. He wants to explore more of the ocean, but he is a bit scared to do so. He is afraid of getting lost. What kind of adventures will Chomps get into?

Who knew coming out as a lesbian in midlife would be such a challenge? After eighteen years of marriage, Rebecca finally admits the truth: she likes women. Tired of living a lie, she divorces her befuddled husband and sets out to explore life as a newly single lesbian woman. Concerned that Rebecca will fall for the first sweet-talking sapphic sister she meets, her sister Alice challenges Rebecca to go out on ten dates with ten different women to explore Seattle’s lesbian dating scene. And she’s recruited all of her friends to try to fix Rebecca up! Little did she know dating women would...

Jack and Sunnie take a much needed vacation to Chicago. For the first time since college, the whole gang is back together, including Sunnie's ex-boyfriend slash Jack's best friend, Ian. During a night of drinking, when everyone else has gone to bed, Sunnie, Jack and Ian are the last ones standing. Until two of them are no longer standing, but laying, on top of each other. Jack's never been more turned on in his life watching his wife with her ex-boyfriend, the only other man she's ever been with. Chicago was just the getaway that they needed. Share Me In Chicago is a dual POV first time, ...

Christmas stories Stories Collection ******************* Young and beginner reader’s kids would get the most enjoyment from the tree titles for Christmas we selected In We hope you enjoy reading them to your kids, grandchildren. SEA OF LOVE <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 Just off by the sea in a small shabby shack, Lived Sarah’s whole family, a big crowded pack, Two parents, three brothers, and three sisters, too; With less room inside as all the kids grew. OH DEAR SAID THE DEER ************************************* "Oh dear," said the deer, "I'm so cold, what a plight! I've searched for a...

1- It’s the tropical getaway they’ve all been wet dreaming about. From the second they arrive in Miami, it’s clear this won’t be the fun-filled week of activities Emmie’s been planning. They could get drunk in lounge chairs at home. She came to have a good time, with or without her husband by her side. Jackson regrets his decision to numb his fears of flying the second his best friend goes traipsing after his wife to the jet ski rental booth. Aaron’s not just Emmie’s ex-boyfriend, he was her first time, and the unfinished business between them creates a sexual tension so thick...

Fresh out of rehab, and on the verge of permanently becoming a Hollywood has-been, veteran and (formerly) well-respected TV producer Jillian Newkirk accepts the only job left in town for him - running the ratings-challenged Thursday Night Wrasslin’ for his ex-fiance’s struggling network. Jabroni: noun, 1) One who is paid to lose. 2) In professional wrestling, a wrestler who loses in order to make another wrestler look good. 3) Jillian Newkirk You’ve heard of David Chase (The Sopranos). You know Vince Gilligan (Breaking Bad). Now, meet Jillian Newkirk, the writer of the biggest show ...

If you’ve just fallen into this beguiling treasure, then it’s in your best interest to just spank yourself and throw this book back in the vault where you found it. Because once opened, fabulous words that grow into sentences and paragraphs and stories will leave you with a massive rock-solid sense of the surreal. Leave now and we can both forget about this momentary plunge of lusciousness your eyes were about to feast on. Go! Prevail upon the legendary badassery life that is yours elsewhere. You have been thanked for your no-obligation, risk-free read of this secure blurb and I wish ...

Alana was a bad girl, the type who could rock your world at the same time she was breaking your heart. Until she met her husband. But she could only suppress the bad girl for so long. When her husband’s fraternity brother hits on her at their welcome home party, she lets him, leading him upstairs to her bedroom. She knows it isn’t right but she wants to let loose for once, let her hair down, become who she used to be for just one more night. She deserves it after the most stressful year of her life. Cam wants to give his beautiful wife everything she deserves, most of all, he wants to ...

When Fred Dorflinger and his wife Carol visit their friends Alan and Loretta Hostetter and their 10 children, they expect a quiet, calm weekend. What ensues instead is a calamity of unexpected visitors, clumsiness, unforeseen events, and a very dangerous bowl of spinach dip. To say more about this short novelette would be to spoil the surprise. Winner of the 1983 John T. Ruhl Memorial award for humor. "I have seen people howl with laughter when Barry Clay reads this story aloud to his friends, but I really, really wish he would have spared me the acute embarrassment and not printed this for...

Fun in the sun is even more fun when two couples can play. Autumn and Sadie are polar opposites, one is wild and carefree, the other has only just experienced true pleasure for the first time while on vacation. Sadie is what Autumn always wanted to be, what she dreams about her life looking like now that she’s opened up a whole new world with Claudia and Grant. She can’t stop herself from repeating the fun she experienced last night with her best friend and her husband. Patrick doesn’t know what’s come over his wife. Okay, that’s a lie, he knows exactly what it is. So when she ...

Fantasy becomes reality. If it doesn’t, it’s just another missed opportunity. Dressed to kill in her husband’s favorite comic book costume, every eye in the convention is glued to Lindsey like her cheerleading days. To feel that longing and desire that her husband showers her with, but from an entire room, it turns her on to no end. They can look all they want, but there’s only one who gets to touch, and she needs his touch now. Ethan knows he’s the luckiest man in the world. He doesn’t mind that every eye in the place is locked on his incredibly sexy wife. No matter who she ...

Don't you wish arrogant jerks had a literal red flag stuck on their head? You'd be walking along, see a cute guy, notice the huge red flag flapping in the breeze and you'd make a detour pronto! Unfortunately, life didn't work that way for some of the people in this group of thirteen stories. They were bamboozled by a charming man's flapping gums and married them. One woman thus inherited a delusional mother-in-law who believed every lie their precious son told them and actually supported his mistress! And how did the wife find out about this side piece? Text conversations. So what did the ...

When the existence of ghosts is finally proven, it’s also discovered they make an amazing renewable energy source and like all the gold rushes in history, the first real money is not made in mining the gold, but selling the supplies to mine the gold and related items or in this case to find and capture the ghosts. But when any new movement is formed there’s a counter movement like PLETS, People for the Legal Ethical Treatment of Specters composed of members enraged at the prospect that the ghost of dear uncle Bob, a life-long vegan might find its self powering a nearby burger franchise.

Bleak Punchline Joke Book set the bar somewhere in the dirt and lost it. Bleak Punchline Joke Book II accidently came across the bar again and buried it deep in the grubby earth. Bleak Punchline Joke Book III, the final act of humourless hubris in the trilogy, forgets about the bar altogether and settles for the dirt. If you have endured Sammy Madden’s musings so far, feel free to repent and absolve yourself of wrongdoing, or, if that doesn’t suit your intellect, please, by all means, lie down and roll around with the remaining swine.