Funny Self

Tired of saccharine self-help advice and relentless positivity? Enter Granny Grimshaw Sourwood, the world-weary, hilariously curmudgeonly anti-guru you never knew you needed. In Granny Grimshaw Sourwood’s Guide to Misery for Others, the inimitable Granny reluctantly shares her hard-won 'wisdom' – a lifetime's worth of cynical strategies for navigating the modern world with minimal effort and maximum personal comfort. Forget finding your bliss; Granny teaches you the practical arts of: Tolerating People: Master relationships by minimizing annoyance and perfecting the art of selective ...

Sisters Hope, Faith and Mercy have everything: fame, success, money and beauty. But what Hope wants most of all is love, and it doesn’t matter how far she has to go to find it. Except real life isn't like the movies. Even if you're a Valentine...

Stop Starting, Start Finishing: The Hilarious, No-Fluff Guide for Procrastinators Who Are Tired of Their Own Excuses Are you a professional procrastinator, part-time excuse generator, or full-time dream abandoner? Do you proudly collect half-finished projects, color-coded planners, and unopened Google Docs? Congratulations—you’ve just found your people. Don’t Finish What You Start is the brutally hilarious, painfully accurate, and weirdly motivational survival guide for anyone who’s made procrastination an extreme sport. This is not your usual self-help fluff. It’s a satirical ...

Places in this book are real, so lucky for you, you can visit Wakefield in the United Kingdom and New York. Prologue Arran owns the amazing popular strawberry field shop in Central Park in New York, with the shop door zooming as people walk in and the stars are the key with many funny happy moments to cheer your heart keeping you well entertained from the start. Jason gives Arran a gift with him having a hot experience that burns his fingers and the wristbands do more than he thinks. Arran misses his brother Bob that had died twenty-eight years ago unconditionally. Do the wristbands help to...

You are a ray of f*cking sunshine. Of course, even an awesome ray like yourself has to deal with shade from a**holes and bullsh*t. That’s why this book exists: to brighten the f*ck out of your day with sparkly humor and badass positivity.

Crash Test is a brutally honest, darkly funny book about what happens when your life doesn’t collapse all at once—but quietly buckles under pressure. No bounce-backs. No five-step plans. Just the anatomy of failure told in short, punchy chapters that read like survival notes found in a glove compartment after the crash. Written for the smart, disillusioned outsider—overachievers who quietly cracked, consultants who forgot what they believe, founders who got tired—Crash Test offers no clean redemption arc. Instead, it tells the truth about what it feels like to fall apart when you're...

In Magikos, life is dictated by the Book of Fate's ancient predictions, including the birth of a royal Chosen One who will save the realm. Princess Marabel has grown up in the shadow of her twin brother, Marco, who everyone assumes is the true Chosen One. While Marco is adored and given every opportunity, Marabel is overlooked and has to practice her sword fighting in secret. But on the night of their 13th birthday, Marco is kidnapped by an evil queen, and Marabel runs to his rescue. Outside the castle walls for the first time, Marabel embarks on a daring mission.

Splash of Fun One woman, a near-death experience, and a gloriously unfiltered adventure in saying YES to life. Margot was hit by a bus while checking her emails. Yes — really. It was the world’s most ridiculous wake-up call… and it worked. Now back from the brink (and fuelled by good wine, questionable hats, and a dog named Toby with spiritual insights), Margot is dragging her reluctant husband Graham into a whirlwind of soul-reviving, joy-inducing mischief. Think underwater motorbikes, spa rebellions, rogue tango lessons, and an accidental moment of infamy involving a squeaky toy and...

Have you ever experienced negative feelings? Been down on yourself and found yourself saying truly horrible things to yourself? Ever been told that you just need to be "more positive"; "just change your thinking"; and "choose to be happy"? Are you tired of being so serious? Do you miss being able to laugh at yourself and with others? Come along with me as I take you on a journey and teach you how to embrace your inner dialogue using tried-and-tested self-care methods to help quiet negative self-talk.

The Best Life Stories by Reader's Digest are 150 of the best hand-picked real-life tales of resilience, joy, and hope - all in 150 words or less! Life has been all about learning lessons.

When I set off for Australia, I had no idea what I would find. There were moments of pure joy, times of struggle, and situations that, looking back, were downright ridiculous. Through it all, I found something I hadn't even realized I was looking for. As a teenager, I watched Australia's Bicentennial celebrations and felt something click. I didn't just want to visit—I needed to go. Over a decade later, after university and a stressful first job, I finally made it happen. I packed my bags, left everything familiar behind, and entered a year of the unknown. Inside, you'll find: • ...

Ever wonder what not to do with your life? We’ve got you covered. How Not To is the world’s most uselessly useful guide to modern living. Packed with 1000 pieces of brilliantly bad advice, this book takes you on a hilarious journey through everything you shouldn’t do—from dating disasters and career-killing moves to social faux pas and health hacks gone horribly wrong. Each page delivers a bite-sized “don’t” with a wink, showing you how to fail spectacularly, awkwardly, and with just enough self-awareness to laugh at yourself along the way. It’s satire, it’s wisdom in ...

This is a collection of my thoughts over the years, well the ones I felt note worthy anyhow. Most are Facebook posts, others private or not so private thought moments. I find most to be humorous and witty. My wife just finds them mildly funny if at all tolerable. She reminds me often that I am not as funny as I think I am. Either way, I hope you enjoy this short collection of moments and stories. In conversation someone asked me if I was opened minded, I replied “Yes, but not to the extent of listening to stupid ideas.” Brian E. Niskala

Author Kristin Giese proves she can deliver a laugh as effortlessly as she can a lesson in Another Hysterical Female. This book features a collection of mostly funny stories from Kristin’s life to fix us, the author included. Her approach is somewhat of a modern-day Mary Poppins - minus the fact that Mary never pulled a vibrator out of her carpetbag. Kristin’s brand of humor is the exact spoonful of sugar we need to help our heartache go down. Another Hysterical Female comes across like an exploration in what it is to be a woman today.

Edie Eckhart is Excited with a capital E to start secondary school with her best friend Oscar - the fish to her chips, the bananas to her custard. But when she and Oscar are put into different tutor groups on their first day, Edie is devastated. Who will play secret hangman with her in class? Who will she eat sausage rolls with? But while she's plotting her reunion with Oscar, she accidentally gets cast as the lead in the school play.

In her first book, actress and star of movies such as Dazed and Confused, Party Girl, You've Got Mail, The House of Yes and so many more, Posey opens up about the art of acting, life on the set, and the realities of its accompanying fame. A funny and colourful southern childhood prepared Posey for a life of creating and entertaining, which not only extends to acting but to the crafts of pottery, sewing, collage, yoga and cooking, all of which listeners will find in this whimsical, hilarious, always entertaining book.

Greetings, humans! Or, as I like to call you, "those bipedal beings who leave strangely intriguing trails of discarded wrappers and half-eaten sandwiches in my carefully cultivated berry patches." I am Bigfoot, or at least, that's what you call me. I prefer "Bartholomew," but let’s be honest, "Bigfoot" is catchy. And honestly, trying to correct everyone constantly is exhausting. It's like arguing with a flock of particularly vocal geese – frustrating and ultimately unproductive. Thus, the chosen name remains. This isn't just another self-help book filled with platitudes about finding ...

If you can discipline yourself to make people laugh because of the types of content you create, then you can get rich and famous. Getting rich should be fun! This audiobook teaches you how a majority of the most successful content creators in the world got rich by making their work fun and enjoyable so that they would spend more time doing their content-creation work.

Play is an essential, necessary, and natural human activity, and it's for adults and companies, too. Funny Business will show you how adults and companies can recapture and use this powerful tool to foster innovation, increase their competitive advantage, and create a vibrant and satisfying workplace. It delves into the concepts of play and what makes it so powerful in children's development' and dispels the myths and beliefs that have made play a dirty word.

Are you a Gnome? Do you want to be one? Do you know what one is? Do you have magical, technical, or any other talent whatsoever? (1) Do you pine after a non-holographic Omnicron, make design sketches of transmorphic actionable multidimensional exo-robotic systems, create novel subroutines for synthetic intelligences, tinker with Dwarf-proof beard mowers, imagine a grand unified theory of life, the universe, and facial hair, or take apart and modify negentropy cannons for fun and amusement? Do you like root vegetables? If you answered yes to one of these questions (2), then you may have what...