Funny Self

Pulling Weeds and Patching Life: Confessions from a Crooked Garden What do tangled hoses, runaway chickens, and zucchini the size of toddlers have in common? Apparently—your emotional wellbeing. In this laugh-out-loud and deeply relatable collection of essays, author and accidental philosopher Debbie Danielsen digs into the messy joy of tending both garden beds and soul wounds. With dirt under her nails and humor in her heart, she explores how compost can teach you about grief, mint about boundaries, and why talking to your tomatoes isn’t all that weird (especially if they talk back). ...

Quotes are a powerful way of educating ourselves about life, and life's lessons - some better, some worse. I truly believe that through listening to quotes and reading quotes, we can tap into the minds of great thinkers, as well as the average Joe.Good quotes bring us down to earth and provide another perspective for us to analyse and connect with. Quotes have the power to inspire, motivate, and of course, have the power to put a gentle smile on one's face.

You’ve put off reading this long enough. But that’s okay—because I’ll Do It Later: The Ultimate Procrastinator’s Survival Guide isn’t here to shame you. It’s here to set you free. Forget what productivity gurus and morning-routine influencers tell you. Procrastination isn’t a curse—it’s a secret weapon, and this book will show you how to use it. Inside, you’ll discover the thrilling rush of last-minute brilliance, the power of looking busy while doing absolutely nothing, and why confidence always beats competence. You’ll learn how to master the illusion of ...

One lost bet, one pizza delivery, and zero clothing—sometimes academic failure has its rewards. When straight-A student Mackenzie loses a GPA competition to her roommates by a mere 0.01 points, the punishment is as mortifying as it is simple: answer the door for the pizza delivery wearing nothing but a towel—and then drop it. It's just a quick flash, she tells herself. A momentary humiliation she'll never have to think about again. Until Jake shows up at her door. Jake isn't just any delivery guy—he's a classmate she's been secretly crushing on for months. He’s the last person on ...

Are you drowning in clutter and treasured keepsakes but can’t bear to part with any of it? Then enlist Maisie Messington—a creative clutterbug—to lead your decluttering crusade. Join Maisie and her sidekick, Dusty Hoover, a vintage vacuum who fancies himself a sports announcer, as they navigate the labyrinth of hoard. From crafting your unique “clutter identity” to curating collections that scream “artfully organized chaos,” you’ll learn to laugh at life’s little mess-ups while embracing your inner pack rat. It’s not just about the mess; Maisie’s journey is packed with...

"Why Men Fear Bitches" is the unapologetic guide to breaking down the walls of outdated gender dynamics, one sassy truth bomb at a time. This book dives headfirst into why strong, confident, and ambitious women often get labeled “bitches”—and why that label isn’t just wrong, it’s downright hilarious. Through a mix of bold humor, personal stories, and the sharpest commentary, we explore how society has conditioned men and women to fear power, assertiveness, and ambition in women. But fear not—this book isn’t about sitting around crying about it. Oh no, honey. It’s about ...

Love, Laugh, Lakshmi is a sparkling blend of romance, humor, and spiritual awakening that follows Claire, a young woman on a mission to find love—no matter the cost. Armed with a chaotic sense of adventure, a stubborn heart, and a tendency to make all the wrong choices, Claire discovers a life-changing ally in Lakshmi, the goddess of abundance. In an unexpected twist of fate, Lakshmi appears to Claire—not as a distant deity, but as a beautiful, invisible friend who can only be seen by those who will never cross Claire’s path again. As Claire navigates the ups and downs of dating ...

☆☆☆☆☆ 'Satisfying, brilliant, thrilling and funny!' (Marcia, Goodreads) Crikey mate! It’s 1983. Wham! are top of the charts. Two besties are on their Big O.E. in London. Then one of them meets a bloke and things turn to shit. Jafa, Jennie Agatha Frances Arthur, is a bit pissed off, to say the least. She can’t understand it. It’s not like he, the bloke – Nigel - is George Michael, or anything. Not even close. Jennie and Evie had planned this trip of a lifetime since the school production of Joseph and his Technicolour Dreamcoat, for heaven’s sake. And now Evie tells her ...

If you've ever wondered how to turn a high-performing team into a chaotic, disjointed mess—congratulations, you're in the right place. In this sharp, hilarious, and painfully relatable guide, FC Bohnke pulls back the curtain on the absurdities of bad leadership. How to Build a Dysfunctional Team in 10 Easy Steps is not your typical management book—it's a survival manual for the modern corporate jungle, exposing exactly how NOT to lead. Inside, you'll discover: The art of micromanaging every decision into oblivion Why rewarding the loudest voice kills real talent How to foster office ...

Buffalo Fluffalo arrives on the scene puffed up with self-importance. Stomping around and raising billows of dust, Buffalo Fluffalo proclaims his superiority to the other creatures—the ram, the prairie dog, and the crow—who just want to be his friend. So Buffalo Fluffalo, who has had enuffalo, heads off to grumble to himself. Suddenly, a rain shower pours down from the clouds and—what’s this? All of his fluffalo is a soggy mess! There Fluffalo stands, a drenched pip-squeak without his disguise.

With a dash of humor, a sprinkle of wisdom, and a heaping scoop of hilarity, this book will have you laughing, thinking, and sharing these quotes with everyone you know. Warning: Side effects may include uncontrollable giggles, a sudden desire to become the resident comedian, and an inexplicable urge to spread joy.

Unlock your potential with a laugh! "The Circle of Awareness" blends dark humor and self-help. Perfect for skeptics and seekers alike. Get your copy on Amazon now!

In this book by Tom Flora, we will find opportunities to put stress in its proper place and learn to have a better outlook at situations that come up in our lives. We may even learn to laugh at ourselves sometimes. This is all about life’s lessons that we can benefit from. If you think life is not as good as it could be, then this book is for you. If you think life is fairly good, then this book is for you. If you think life is good, then you are going to love listening to these experiences because you will be able to relate to them.

In a world where scrolling has become second nature and "likes" dictate our self-worth, Disconnect to Reconnect offers a lifeline to those drowning in the digital noise. This transformative self-help book is your guide to breaking free from the endless cycle of social media addiction and rediscovering the joy of authentic living. Through practical strategies, heartfelt insights, and actionable steps, you’ll learn how to silence the constant ping of notifications, reclaim your time, and rebuild meaningful connections—both with yourself and the people who matter most. Whether you’re ...

There is a lot of stupid research out there. And many stupid questions remain. This book surveys, then builds upon the work of Cipolla, Dunning, Kruger, Peter, Murphy, and other luminous minds to explore the fascinating behaviors of Stupidity, Idiocy and Foolishness...and in doing so discovers the dangerous Villains who would make fools of us all, and a tenuous hope for our own Heroism. Would such heroism be brave … or stupid? The easy and fun way in which this book simplifies mathematically challenging concepts lets you explore the latest advances of qualitative reasoning and computer ...

Welcome to the kind approach to weight loss. This is different from other weight loss books. It's packed with stories about how other people lost weight, along with small tips that lead to subtle mind changes and big success. "This book works. You will lose weight and feel so much better about yourself." Daily Mail "A warm, tender, friendly book that helped me lose 20lbs..." Heath & Fitness magazine The book stars Mary Brown - the heroine of the Mary Brown series of novels. She's funny, gorgeous and bonkers, and when the series starts, she's seriously overweight. She heads for Fat Club and ...

You’ve read the tips. You’ve tried the teas. You’ve stared at the ceiling like it owed you money. Still wide awake? If you’re exhausted, frustrated, and wondering if you’ll ever sleep like a normal human again… I get it. I’ve been there. And I’m here to help. I’m not a doctor. I’m not a wellness guru. I’m a rogue librarian—equal parts sleep-deprived researcher, caffeine survivor, and curious human—who went down the rabbit hole of sleep science when nothing else worked. This book is the result of that deep dive. It’s the guide I wish I had years ago. The Rogue ...

Are you tired of feeling like a gym douchebag? Do you want to cultivate a more mindful, respectful approach to your workouts and fitness journey? Look no further than 30 Days to Stop Being a Gym Douchebag. This comprehensive workbook offers a practical and effective mindfulness program designed to help you transform your gym habits and become a more mindful, respectful member of your fitness community. With 30 unique mindfulness exercises, each accompanied by a corresponding hashtag that allows you to connect with others and share your insights online, this workbook provides a step-by-step ...

How stinky is your life right now? When was the last time you took a deep look inside? Do you find yourself doing things you don’t want to do, and making mistakes that affect the ones you love? It’s time to face your fears, stop the distractions, and take a good look at where your life is heading. Self-Awareness will enable you to develop better habits, and live a life full of purpose and freedom. Knowing yourself is the road map to living on your terms, accomplishing specific goals, and developing better relationships. If we do not understand our own person and behavior, how can we ...

Prologue. There is plenty of light humour inside of this story to keep you entertained. Carlos gets woken by the television freezing in the same position with crows and the Devil on the screen with him freaking out, with him unable to get back to sleep going for a walk, he then notices what it looked like a witch floating in the air dressed in black. Streetlights inside of the lampposts go dark with Carlos ending up in the graveyard, Witch Sue was holding a broomstick with a cauldron announcing that she was waiting for a blue stone falling from the sky to take over the world bringing dead ...