Funny Self

Are you tired of feeling like a gym douchebag? Do you want to cultivate a more mindful, respectful approach to your workouts and fitness journey? Look no further than 30 Days to Stop Being a Gym Douchebag. This comprehensive workbook offers a practical and effective mindfulness program designed to help you transform your gym habits and become a more mindful, respectful member of your fitness community. With 30 unique mindfulness exercises, each accompanied by a corresponding hashtag that allows you to connect with others and share your insights online, this workbook provides a step-by-step ...

Quotes are a powerful way of educating ourselves about life, and life's lessons - some better, some worse. I truly believe that through listening to quotes and reading quotes, we can tap into the minds of great thinkers, as well as the average Joe.Good quotes bring us down to earth and provide another perspective for us to analyse and connect with. Quotes have the power to inspire, motivate, and of course, have the power to put a gentle smile on one's face.

Welcome to the kind approach to weight loss. This is different from other weight loss books. It's packed with stories about how other people lost weight, along with small tips that lead to subtle mind changes and big success. "This book works. You will lose weight and feel so much better about yourself." Daily Mail "A warm, tender, friendly book that helped me lose 20lbs..." Heath & Fitness magazine The book stars Mary Brown - the heroine of the Mary Brown series of novels. She's funny, gorgeous and bonkers, and when the series starts, she's seriously overweight. She heads for Fat Club and ...

“Spiritual-ish: City Girl Stuck in a Jungle Retreat” is a laugh-out-loud romantic comedy where cynicism meets ceremony, and sarcasm collides with self-discovery. When Talia — a city girl with a designer wardrobe, a ‘perfect’ boyfriend, and zero patience for nonsense — ends up in a South American jungle retreat, the last thing she expects is a shaman-led ayahuasca ceremony, wild spiritual insights… or the reappearance of her long-lost first love. Between sacred rituals, questionable jungle cuisine, and one seriously sexy blast from her past, Talia’s about to find that ...

One lost bet, one pizza delivery, and zero clothing—sometimes academic failure has its rewards. When straight-A student Mackenzie loses a GPA competition to her roommates by a mere 0.01 points, the punishment is as mortifying as it is simple: answer the door for the pizza delivery wearing nothing but a towel—and then drop it. It's just a quick flash, she tells herself. A momentary humiliation she'll never have to think about again. Until Jake shows up at her door. Jake isn't just any delivery guy—he's a classmate she's been secretly crushing on for months. He’s the last person on ...

Prologue. There is plenty of light humour inside of this story to keep you entertained. Carlos gets woken by the television freezing in the same position with crows and the Devil on the screen with him freaking out, with him unable to get back to sleep going for a walk, he then notices what it looked like a witch floating in the air dressed in black. Streetlights inside of the lampposts go dark with Carlos ending up in the graveyard, Witch Sue was holding a broomstick with a cauldron announcing that she was waiting for a blue stone falling from the sky to take over the world bringing dead ...

*** Please note that this book will be republished soon. Follow me or join my mailing list for updates.*** ☆☆☆☆☆ 'Satisfying, brilliant, thrilling and funny!' (Marcia, Goodreads) Crikey mate! It’s 1983. Wham! are top of the charts. Two besties are on their Big O.E. in London. Then one of them meets a bloke and things turn to shit. Jafa, Jennie Agatha Frances Arthur, is a bit pissed off, to say the least. She can’t understand it. It’s not like he, the bloke – Nigel - is George Michael, or anything. Not even close. Jennie and Evie had planned this trip of a lifetime since ...

Wrangling Ducklings: How to Get Your Life Together When You Can’t Keep Your Ducks in a Row By Annie Rowen If you’ve ever whispered, “What ducks?” while staring into the chaos of your life, this book is for you. Wrangling Ducklings is a hilarious, hopeful, and deeply relatable guide for anyone who’s tired of pretending they’ve got it all together. With equal parts wisdom and wit, Annie Rowen invites you to stop chasing perfection, release the pressure to perform, and embrace a life that’s honest, a little messy, and absolutely your own. Inside, you’ll find: 12 laugh-out-loud ...

So, You Think Your Life Can’t Get Any Worse? Don’t Sell Yourself Short. It Can! Dive into the delightfully satirical pages of The 21½ Probable Laws of Mediocrity ©—a book that masterfully employs reverse psychology, wrapped in layers of humor and wit, to deliver a message that’s both amusing and unexpectedly insightful. This isn't your average self-help book. In fact, it boldly positions itself as the antithesis, playfully challenging readers to engage in a bit of self-reflection by presenting a guide on how to achieve a life of spectacular mediocrity. Through its tongue-in-cheek ...

Hector Dumble thinks he's dumb. When his dog, Buster, starts talking to him, Hector begins to think he's crazy too. Things become even stranger when Hector learns that his teacher Mr Weazel has a secret identity. How will Hector handle having a dog that can talk and a teacher who wants to take over the world?

If you've ever wondered how to turn a high-performing team into a chaotic, disjointed mess—congratulations, you're in the right place. In this sharp, hilarious, and painfully relatable guide, FC Bohnke pulls back the curtain on the absurdities of bad leadership. How to Build a Dysfunctional Team in 10 Easy Steps is not your typical management book—it's a survival manual for the modern corporate jungle, exposing exactly how NOT to lead. Inside, you'll discover: The art of micromanaging every decision into oblivion Why rewarding the loudest voice kills real talent How to foster office ...

Dive into the delightful world of flatulence – Discover fascinating facts and hilarious stories about farts, even if you've always dismissed them as "just gas"! Do you find yourself avoiding the topic of flatulence because it seems too juvenile? Does the idea of a conversation starter that combines humor and education sound appealing? Have you ever wondered if there's more to farts than mere childish humor and would love to explore their quirky science? If so, you're not in isolation. Many people consistently overlook the amusing yet scientifically rich world of farts, often due to ...

After observing his cat, Ziggy, for years, Stephane Garnier became convinced that cats have life down to an art form, so he set out to share Ziggy's je ne sais quoi with the world. Highlighting 40 trademark cat qualities that are (almost) entirely applicable to human daily living, Garnier provides insights that are delightfully useful as well as tips for living a day in the life of a cat - and a Q&A to test your cat quotient to see how much work you have to do learn the subtle art of living like a feline.

The Best Self-Help Book You'll Never Need to Read (Because Buying It Counts as Reading It*) Ever wondered why every life-changing revelation comes in exactly seven steps? Or why your morning routine isn't transformative enough unless it involves pre-dawn headstands and astronomically priced green juice? In this wickedly observant satire, our cheerfully delusional narrator guides you through the art of becoming a self-help guru - without all that messy business of actually achieving anything first. From creating color-coded spreadsheets to track your emotional growth (because feelings need ...

Zarah’s life is a spiritual rollercoaster—one that she didn’t exactly sign up for. An atheist who’s tried it all, from astrology to energy healing, Zarah is tired of dabbling in the new-age nonsense that promises peace and clarity but only delivers confusion and drama. Enter: the universe, determined to drag her back into the cosmic chaos. After an accidental encounter with an ex, a whirlwind gallery adventure, and a few too many “signs” from the universe, Zarah finds herself at a crossroads—spiritually and emotionally. Should she give in to her mom’s pleas and return to ...

In Magikos, life is dictated by the Book of Fate's ancient predictions, including the birth of a royal Chosen One who will save the realm. Princess Marabel has grown up in the shadow of her twin brother, Marco, who everyone assumes is the true Chosen One. While Marco is adored and given every opportunity, Marabel is overlooked and has to practice her sword fighting in secret. But on the night of their 13th birthday, Marco is kidnapped by an evil queen, and Marabel runs to his rescue. Outside the castle walls for the first time, Marabel embarks on a daring mission.

Fourteen-year-old Wyatt is having a difficult time dealing with the death of his mother. He often visits the spot where he and his mother would star gaze and dream of what it's like on Mars. Before she died, he told her he intended on traveling to Mars someday. Meanwhile, Herman is a teenage Martian who watches the NASA channel on the teletube and dreams of visiting Earth. One night, he and his friends take a joyride in a spaceship and ends up on Earth, where they accidentally zap Wyatt aboard before flying back home to Mars. Wyatt and Herman quickly become friends—and both like to ...

Modern Stories Meet Biblical Truths What if the miracles of Jesus happened today? Jesus and the OnlyFans Star: And Other Remixed Gospel Stories reimagines Gospel events in modern contexts, weaving relatable stories with profound biblical analysis to inspire your faith and deepen your understanding of God’s power. This book offers: Relatable Stories: An OnlyFans star searching for redemption. A mother fighting for her son in a psychiatric ward. A police chief desperate to heal his deputy. Biblical Retellings: Witty, accessible versions of the original Gospel stories. Practical Reflections:...

Eight short stories about art, shadows and self. Creighton's second short story collection introduces us to a gallery owner who worries her husband will leave her for a doppelgänger; an artist whose creativity is blocked by intense fear on a retreat; a would-be writer who opens a PO Box to gather other people's letters to God; two mothers with guilty secrets; a young student contemplating suing a lecturer for boring her into deep slumber; a geologist travelling the earth to find herself; and a woman who flies home to bury her dead uncle, only to end up in a compromising situation. ...

All about the wonders of virtue signaling! Most of you won't need this but for those who do, it is a most valuable resource. Topics range from virtue signaling online, virtue signaling in person, and even when others wouldn't find it appropriate. Explore the true depth of thought crime prosecution!