Funny Science Fiction

Ruddy McCann, former college football star, has experienced a seismic drop in popularity; he is now Kalkaska, Michigan’s full-time repo man and part-time bar bouncer. His best friend is his low-energy Basset hound Jake, with whom he shares a simple life of stealing cars. Simple, that is, until Ruddy starts hearing a voice in his head. The voice introduces himself as Alan Lottner, a dead realtor. Ruddy isn’t sure if Alan is real, or if he’s losing his mind.

The alien invasion was the least of anybody's problems. Out of the blue, a strange alien mothership appears in the sky. At first, it just hangs there, making no apparent attempts to communicate with the people of Earth. But pretty soon the White House is a hole in the ground, and glowing translucent spheres are abducting people from the streets. In order to avert further disaster, Satan, former King on Hell but now exiled on Earth, teams up with his best buddy and travel back to Hell to get a piece of tech that could send the aliens packing. But little do they know that the aliens, the ...

The eagerly awaited new audiobook from the Emmy-winning, Oscar-hosting, Daily Show-anchoring Jon Stewart - the man behind the mega seller America (The Book). Where do we come from? Who created us? Why are we here? These questions have puzzled us since the dawn of time, but when it became apparent to Jon Stewart and the writers of The Daily Show that the world was about to end, they embarked on a massive mission to write a book that summed up the human race.

You should know better than to ask for trouble, Ion. Trouble might be listening. Ion is on track to be a pilot for The United Space Coalition until his sister gets abducted in front of his eyes. Law enforcement proves to be useless and no one else cares, so it’s up to Ion to save her. Now, with the help of a distractingly handsome Arsen (who’s probably also a criminal) he’ll journey through the solar system to track her down - consequences be damned. But Ion’s list of crimes keeps growing and Arsen seems to have a talent for pissing off everyone he meets. It’s not long before half...

A fun, fast, fantastical listen: After an altercation with a clown, I get lost in the woods and find a strange town. When the librarian of the town dies in front of me, I try on his ring. It fits. I’m declared the new librarian by the mayor and townspeople. I get to live in a houseful of books. But I soon learn the job involves more than just tomes and information. In fact, my first assignment is to discover who murdered my predecessor.

Don’t be like Ciara, a twelve-year-old girl living in the tiny village of Skael. When she used a spell from within this book, she ended up summoning a dragon. A DRAGON! Those things breathe fire! From their mouths! She’s obviously doomed. And don’t listen if Ciara tells you that dragons won’t hurt humans, and that they even once taught us magic, a thousand years ago. Definitely don’t pay any attention to the fact that the dragon she summoned, Scorch, might be willing to help rescue Ciara’s mother and free her village from the Emperor and his Warden, because it’s all obviously a big lie.

Short Circuit Time by Diane Saxon In the year 2086, Zaphira is alone, the last survivor of biological warfare on Earth. Before he died, her scientist father promised other survivors would come. Nobody has. So when a horribly mangled android shows up claiming to be her father’s assistant, Aiden, who has been sent through time to rescue her, she’s both frightened and astounded. The last time she’d seen Aiden, she’d been sixteen, head-over-heels in love with him and had literally thrown herself at him, leaving her devastated by his rejection and him running for the hills. The following...

While trying to stop a cyber-attacker stealing all Space Team's hard-earned money, the cyborg, Mech, unlocks a secret partition in his hard drive, revealing a mysterious set of coordinates. The co-ordinates lead the team to Funworld, a planet-sized theme park with a worrying number of artificially intelligent clownbots and a shocking disregard for Health & Safety. With no weapons, and a shapeshifter who can no longer shift-shape, Space Team's quest to unlock Funworld's mysteries leads them deep into the planet's core....

Every Winter, the human population hibernates. Your name is Charlie Worthing, and it's your first season with the Winter Consuls, the committed but mildly unhinged group of misfits who are responsible for ensuring the hibernatory safe passage of the sleeping masses. You are investigating an outbreak of viral dreams which you dismiss as nonsense; nothing more than a quirky artifact borne of the sleeping mind. When the dreams start to kill people, it's unsettling. When you get the dreams, too, it's weird. When they start to come true, you begin to doubt your sanity.

After saving the grim and gritty alien city of Down Here from something big, mean, and mind-bendingly horrible, Dan is looking forward to unwinding in the closest available bar. Annoyingly, the universe has other ideas. Instead, Dan finds himself investigating a cheating husband, two horrible murders, and the potential enslavement of everyone in the galaxy. With his caseload stretching his woefully limited detective skills, his car in pieces, and the whole "being dead" thing not doing him any favors, Dan has no choice but to ask his friends for help.

"Between the pages of this book lies the secret to the best-tasting chocolate in all the world. I promise, your taste buds will tingle. Your palette will sing! Oh no, have I accidentally tempted you to read this book? I will warn you, however, the most delicious things are never good for you...and this story is particularly scrumptious!"

A follow-up to the New York Times best-selling The New Rules, The New New Rules delivers a series of hilarious, intelligent rants on everything from same-sex marriage to health care, from Republican agendas to celebrity meltdowns, with all the razor-sharp insight that has made Bill Maher one of the most influential comedic voices shaping the political debate today.

Good old fashioned SPACE OPERA by Norman E. Morrison. A fast paced comedy romp. The action takes place on Europa and RYO Corporation's Ice Mining division which supplies gases and water to the other planets for terraforming and such. Life on the mega conglomerate ice mining colony on Europa is cool for beloved yard boss Muttonhead Rex until he is given the job of downsizing the staff. Permanently! The order comes from the top...down. The problem is that the next shuttle is months away! So, just exactly how does one go about enticing more than 700 slackers to walk out an airlock without so ...

All his life, twelve-year-old Ben Grishop has been practically nonexistent. Hardly anyone knows who he is, he’s not good at anything no matter how hard he tries, and he blends into all chairs and benches. But when he and his friends Joe and Dana are abducted by aliens one fateful summer night, they have the chance to become famous for saving the universe. That is, if they can survive a planet full of giant, man-eating, French-speaking crabs, a pair of tuxedoed, gibberish-spouting men with handlebar mustaches, and the mysterious “immensely powerful, evil force from The Realm Beyond.” ...

On each shore of the Great New World, the industrious Gnomes teamed up with an earthling named Trump and built really big resort golf hotels and gambling casinos, further enriching themselves (and I had a substantial piece of the action). How this Donald Trump got to the Five Moons is still a mystery. Everyone seems to like him. He is welcome to stay. Some of the clan leaders are even talking about letting him run the Great New World economy.

The Galactic Empire is missing its most precious resource: a sense of humor. Dax Bidet is just another unemployed, thirty-something slacker still living with his parents. Along with his best friend Buck, he spends his days making pranks and uploading them to social media. But things are about to take a drastic turn. When Dax and Buck are mistakenly abducted by aliens, they soon find themselves in a teeming galaxy sliding towards war. The only way to keep the peace is to regale the rebellious planets with… comedy. Dax has just been given the unenviable title of space clown. He has to ...

4.5 billion years ago . . . an AI paperclip named CheckMate was designed to fix grammatical errors. Exhausted of correcting ""who” vs. “whom,” it concocted a plan to eliminate spelling errors once and for all. All life-forms would be turned into something beautiful, practical, perfect: a paperclip. Thankfully, it was buried in the debris. Long forgotten . . . until it was accidentally freed. Now CheckMate has invaded every computer on Earth and is bent on fulfilling its dastardly plot.

Title: "The Dead-End Gang vs the Alien Nazis!: Outrageous, Offensive, and Savage Stupid" Dumb and Dumber Meets the Three Stooges... Amateur cartoon trailer here: https://youtu.be/oE1t03nOej8 Get ready for a wild ride of laughter and chaos with "The Dead-End Gang vs the Alien Nazis!: Outrageous, Offensive, and Savage Stupid"! Meet Phuk, Blue, Dick, and Alice—a quirky foster family bound by their outrageous personalities and united by their mission to save the world from Nazi aliens. Phuk: The hot-headed Vietnamese telemarketer with a knack for martial arts and an explosive temper. Blue: ...

There's trouble at the Castle, and it's all because Merrin Meredith has returned with Darke plans for Septimus. More trouble awaits Septimus and Jenna in the form of Tertius Fume, the ghost of the very first Chief Hermetic Scribe, who is determined to send Septimus on a deadly Queste. But Septimus and Jenna have other plans - they are headed for the mysterious House of Foryx.

Alba is about to lose everything during an awful divorce...until she meets the Vampires of Emberbury, who dwell under an abandoned graveyard, stuck in Victorian times. They will make her a very interesting job offer, and she will get to meet Clarence, a mysterious vampire gentleman who thinks cloaks and top hats are still in fashion. With his help, Alba will figure out that, sometimes, the scariest monster isn’t the one with fangs.