Funny Science Fiction

Welcome to Bezim, where sword-slinging bravi race through the night and rich and idle alchemists make magic out of mixing and measuring the four planes of reality. Siyon Velo, Dockside brat turned petty alchemist, scrapes a living hopping between the planes to harvest ingredients for the city’s alchemists. But when Siyon accidentally commits an act of impossible magic, he’s catapulted into the limelight—which is a bad place to be when the planes start lurching out of alignment, threatening to send Bezim into the sea.

Space Traipse strikes again with this parody of ST: TAS “Yesteryear.” An away mission in time erases Ensign Ellie Doall, replacing her with a busybody alternate self that wreaks havoc across the Union. Now a vengeful warlord razes the galaxy on a mission to kill her, and her former friends are glad to help. Can Ellie stop her younger self from ruining their life? Cringe at the improbable character 'shipping. Learn the secret to the Impulsive’s Miracle Ensign. Watch Warlord Enigo LaFuentes put Khan to shame. Snag this Space Traipse adventure and let’s do the time plot as only the HMB...

Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend - that's right, just one - at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like a mix of salted pork and Icelandic bog). The problem is, Greg isn't ordinary... he's actually a fantastical Dwarf! He discovers the truth the day his dad brings home a gross new tea - one that awakens bizarre abilities in Greg. Then a murderous Bro-Troll kidnaps his dad and Greg is whisked away to the Underground, where Dwarves have lived for centuries right beneath Chicago.

Once upon a time, there was a king and queen in a land called Love's Keep who once loved one another, but alas, no more. Without love, they were doomed to be ousted from their kingdom at the end of a year and a day. A year and a day passed. This is where their story starts. Imelda and Ambrose can't remember why they got married. A year and a day ago, Ambrose consulted a witch, trading their love to save Imelda's life - and they've been stuck with one another ever since.

Welcome to a world where mosquitoes are more than just annoying—they’re everywhere, always hungry, and immune to every spray, zapper, and citronella candle money can buy. Enter Dr. Shmitza VonClankerberg: eccentric genius, slipper-wearing night owl, and humanity’s last hope for a bite-free summer. When itchy desperation pushes him into action, Dr. VonClankerberg launches an epic, globe-hopping quest to invent the one mosquito repellent that works for everyone, everywhere, all the time. But his journey quickly spirals into chaos—uncovering secret pastry cults, weaponized biscotti, ...

Need the perfect man? No problem—simply create him! Ivy wanted nothing more for Christmas than to have someone to come home to, a companion to chat about her day with, and someone to show off at her family holiday celebrations. Instead of wishing on a star, she takes matters into her own hands. Ivy creates her perfect companion at Dream Droids, the premier robotics company specializing in sentient humanoids. She spends weeks with Dr. Pierce, creating her dream man. Every detail is worked out, from his appearance, personality, and even his knowledge of her life. This will be the best ...

After an altercation with a clown, I get lost in the woods and find a strange town. When the librarian of the town dies in front of me, I try on his ring. It fits. I’m declared the new librarian by the mayor and townspeople. I get to live in a houseful of books. But I soon learn the job involves more than just tomes and information. In this second novel in the series, a library book goes missing. Not just any book but the true story of what happened in Eden, among other true stories certain humans and angels don't want told. I have to find this book.

Kevin Austin has no plans of staying in the strange mountain town of Eden when he ends up becoming the new librarian after the previous one is murdered. He soon realizes this is no ordinary library. The books actually talk and fly around the rooms, and there's a ghost haunting the premises. Not to mention a collection of dangerous magical artifacts in the basement. In the town of Eden, Kevin encounters witches, zombies, demons, talking crows, angels, even gods and goddesses. Everyone in town seems to have secrets, including the alluring Olive, who Kevin falls for in book 1.

The Terraist Letters is the ultimate archontic allegory set in the nuclear age. Who is Sean Enstitue? Sean Enstitue has gone by many names, and Sean believes he is the world's last chance. Sean lives on the last street, off of the last stop of The A train, in the last apartment building, and on the last corner in Manhattan, on 218th Street. He has lived in Inwood, by Washington Heights, for his whole life. Sean believes that nuclear experimentation is destroying the atmosphere, causing global warming, negatively impacting the health of life on the entire planet, and because of what he knows...

Fort Fitzgerald can’t stop having nightmares about the day his father was taken from him in an attack on Washington, DC. In these dreams, an Old One, an evil beyond comprehension, demands the location of the last dragon. But other than some dragon skeletons dug up with the books of magic on Discovery Day, Fort has never seen a dragon before. Could there still be one left alive? And weirdly, Fort’s not the only one at the Oppenheimer School having these nightmares. His new roommate, Gabriel, seems to know more than he’s letting on about this dragon as well.

Almost one year ago, Alice TodHunter Moon left her PathFinder village to become Apprentice to ExtraOrdinary Wizard Septimus Heap. Now, in faraway lands, the Castle is in peril. The brilliant blue stone is crumbling to dust, and both the witch Marisa and the wicked Red Queen have their eyes on the throne. But as Tod sets off on a hazardous journey to find a new Keystone, her life may be in the greatest danger of all. Can she save the Castle while evading the fate that befell her mother?

In Soul to Soul, Jon, Simon and Lyn continue to trip and stumble across the universe in search of the ultimate margarita and a possible date for their friend Gilbert. As usual, they become tangled up with the universal forces of confusion, female androids are added into the mix, abstract consciousness is discovered in soup bowl, late night cable movies are discussed, insane theories win out and, as always, an ample amount of alcohol is consumed along the way. All this for your reading entertainment. This novel supports Amazon’s ‘look inside’ feature so if you like witty dialogue and ...

From the New York Times-best-selling author Sloane Crosley comes Look Alive Out There - a brand-new collection of essays filled with her trademark hilarity, wit, and charm. The characteristic heart and punch-packing observations are back, but with a newfound coat of maturity. A thin coat. More of a blazer, really. Fans of I Was Told There'd Be Cake and How Did You Get This Number know Sloane Crosley's life as a series of relatable but madcap misadventures.

Nava Katz traded a lost dream for an impressively cynical attitude. The one thing she does care about? Her hard-working twin brother. Then she interrupts his induction ceremony into a secret supernatural society, accidentally torches his life-long ambition, and steals his destiny. Wait—whaaaat? She expects to be chastised, not thrown into a trial by fire, battling demons to keep humanity safe while she’s learning to master her powers and facing her worst nightmare: a purpose.

People don’t pay Tad Mortriciano much attention. And that’s a problem. Tad, you see, is a movie star. Or rather was. That is until the night he comes down with a mild cold and an unexplained darkening of his birthmark, shaped like a badminton shuttlecock. He starts to lose screen presence, his movies flop, his mother stops calling and his dog ignores him. He takes to wearing lime green candy-striped suits to get attention, but no one cares. Until one day when he is accosted in the library by a young woman wearing dental headgear, who has the same dark birthmark. Together, they encounter...

Collection of the first two bestselling Vampire Nation dystopian thrillers, including: VAMPIRE NATION (Book 1) Four hundred years into the future, in a dystopian world inside a sphere city called Vampire Nation, there are only three choices for humans: be turned into a vampire at the age of eighteen, become a breeder, or become a feeder slave. On the eve of her required turning ceremony, Ariana Waters has second thoughts about becoming a vampire. She won’t be able to bear natural daylight anymore... or have children. And she will not only be bound to obey their vampire creed, she might be...

On a desperate journey to recover her sister's lost soul, Valkyrie Cain goes up against the High Sanctuary itself, and there's nothing Skulduggery Pleasant can do to stop her. With Abyssinia's grand plan about to kick off in a night of magic, terror, and bloodshed, it falls to Omen Darkly to save the lives of thousands of innocent people. And as the madness unfolds around him, as hidden enemies step into the light, and as Valkyrie is sucked into a desperate, lawless quest of her own, he has no choice but to become the hero he never really wanted to be - or die in the attempt.

What happens when a group of business executives, who find they can no longer exploit the inhabitants of Earth and despoil its natural resources because of do-gooder laws, travel to another world in search of easy profits? They find the locals thought of it first. This romp across the galaxy takes us to Kalista, the larger of the planets of the Smiling Disc star system, where intelligent life has been discovered that has a very different outlook from what we call intelligent life on Earth. The group of travellers gets the opportunity to compare not only business practices on Kalista with ...

The Cryptids have started to kill a large amount of humans in the Upper Midwest. Banks' bosses told her not to call in the Cryptid Assassin.... He's too expensive. Now, the showdown between Taylor and the creatures will stop when one or the other is dead...and it isn't looking good for Taylor.

Doug wasn’t sure whether he should trust Satan. The red flag was that he said he was Satan. But the deal was good: Listen to Satan’s story in exchange for some donuts. And Doug only half-fulfilled his part of the bargain. But maybe he should have listened better, because during his friend Bryce’s next scheme (theft with light to moderate treason - the usual), Doug and the rest of his friends - Lulu (the fun one) and Charlene (the not fun one) - end up with a powerful artifact, a small metal cube with world-ending power that Lulu decorated with bunnies.