Funny Science Fiction

Fact: Robots are awesome. They have lasers for eyes, rockets for feet, and supercomputers for brains! Plus, robots never have to eat steamed beans or take baths, or go to bed. If only there were some sort of magical “Robo-Sauce” that turned squishy little humans into giant awesome robots.... Well, now there is.

WHEN A VAMPIRE ACCIDENTALLY EXPOSES HERSELF TO SUNLIGHT... Can the sun god, Apollo, save her from destruction, and what will he expect in return? Reading this poignant, erotic short story, you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll shiver with juicy excitement. Intended for mature audiences 18+ only. Contains explicit descriptions of sexual acts, vampire trivia, crypto-erotica, and historical mead references. This book is 2,102 words long, and deeply moving. Or arousing. Or both.

How far would you go to make your dreams come true? On Hal Spacejock's home planet, efficient and highly intelligent robots have taken most of the jobs. Hal's one of the lucky ones, because he works as a cargo loader at a third-rate spaceport. Lucky perhaps, but not satisfied. Because instead of loading freighters, Hal wants to fly them, exploring the galaxy in his very own ship. But how can he possibly save for a spaceship? Hal can barely make rent, and he's hanging onto his job by his fingernails. It all seems like an impossible dream, until Hal intervenes in a one-sided fight in the ...

Welcome to Other Worlds, the fourth volume in the Guys Read Library. Prepare yourself for 10 trips into the unknown, as 10 of your favorite writers spin tales of fantasy and science fiction the likes of which you have never imagined. Compiled by National Ambassador for Children's Literature (and Secret Ambassador for the Intergalactic Alliance) Jon Scieszka, Guys Read: Other Worlds is the most exciting collection of stories on this - or any other - planet.

Watch out - the Earth just fell into a dark sun's orbit! Or maybe you'd rather visit a theme park called Hell? These are just two of the strange and unnerving tales you'll find in this collection of great science fiction and fantasy stories.

In book 4 there’s the librarian, of course, all the main characters from books 1-3, including the town of Eden which is certainly a main character, and a witch. It begins with her asking the librarian to find her Familiar, a cat. It ends with, well, I can’t tell you that. Expect suspense and unexpected twists and turns, odd characters, and the same kind of humor that is in the other novels because I’m pretty much unable to have any other kind. Hope you enjoy it.

In consequence of a number of stunning catastrophes, Arthur Dent is surprised to find himself living in a hideously miserable cave on prehistoric Earth. However, just as he thinks that things cannot get possibly worse, they suddenly do. He discovers that the Galaxy is not only mind-boggingly big and bewildering but also that most of the things that happen in it are staggeringly unfair.

Dane finds himself caught up in the midst of this ultimate quest to unlock the secrets of universal continuation. Enter a rich world and encounter what you least expect on this epic adventure.

In Geppetto’s Daughter, family bonds are stretched, various appendages are cut off, castle walls are breached, warranties are voided, space battles occur, jokes are made about pianists and, of course, a liberal amount of alcohol is consumed throughout. All this for your reading pleasure. This novel supports Amazon’s ‘look inside’ feature so if you like witty dialogue and interesting characters coupled with an absorbing story line click on the cover image and read a bit. If you like it, buy it. If you really like it, buy three or four. Geppetto’s Daughter is the third book in the ...

Ethan seems like a normal ten-year-old, but he has a secret. It’s not that he’s the one who accidentally filled the sunblock container with glue last summer or that he cracked the screen on his sister’s phone and blamed it on their baby brother. (Those things may have happened, but they’ve got nothing on this). No, Ethan’s secret is that he knows time travel is real—because his future self keeps coming back to visit him.

It’s all fun and games at the circus...until everyone’s favorite clown winds up dead. Someone killed Clint the Clown. Madam Electra’s crystal ball could help find the murderer, but she risks exposing her own secrets in the process. Secrets that could land her on the endangered species list. Head security officer Bruno Maska has been ordered to enlist the help of the one person he suspects is hiding something - Electra. The same woman who’s been haunting his thoughts since their drunken night together.

When the existence of ghosts is finally proven, it’s also discovered they make an amazing renewable energy source and like all the gold rushes in history, the first real money is not made in mining the gold, but selling the supplies to mine the gold and related items or in this case to find and capture the ghosts. But when any new movement is formed there’s a counter movement like PLETS, People for the Legal Ethical Treatment of Specters composed of members enraged at the prospect that the ghost of dear uncle Bob, a life-long vegan might find its self powering a nearby burger franchise.

Alex has a crush on the new teacher’s assistant, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to approach her. Too bad she’s crossed the University’s star player, and Duncan Shaw has no choice but to make her disappear. He plans to lay the blame on the local urban legend, but tonight he just might learn that some legends are real.

A broken-down fugitive with nothing to lose, an arms dealer hiding a deadly secret and an elderly robot set to inherit a vast fortune... it's a typical cargo job for freighter pilot Hal Spacejock and his offsider, Clunk. Baker's Dough features intense rivalry, sublime double-crosses and more greed than a free buffet.

"Dragons have invaded Crumbling Castle, and all of King Arthur’s knights are either on holiday or visiting their grannies. It’s a disaster! Luckily, there’s a spare suit of armour and a very small boy called Ralph who’s willing to fill it. Together with Fortnight the Friday knight and Fossfiddle the wizard, Ralph sets out to defeat the fearsome fire-breathers. But there's a teeny weeny surprise in store.

*(Hello, I’m the Narrator, and welcome, my fiends, to a tale of twisted tragedy, petrifying producers, and stage fright so bad it could raise the dead, literally, they’re all over the place. They’re actually the production crew.)* *(Gather around for the opening monologue of ‘Tales From The Cryptkeeper William Shakespeare #1: Romeo Dracula and Juliet Van Helsing!’ and we can’t forget the subtitle ‘Part One: Cursed Starcrossed Lovers Who Are Really Having A Hard Time Of It’. For Pete’s sake! (Pete’s my non-related twin.) How do I put it? The book’s title is an ...

It's the 25th century, and the American President has taken over the world. Meanwhile, after a cleaner unplugged his cryogenic freezing machine by accident, Detective Inspector Capstan wakes up to find that he's been in a state of suspended animation for more than 400 years. As he's forced to adjust to life in the future, he finds himself reinstated as a policeman, and together with the great-great-great-great-grandson of his former subordinate, Sergeant Dewbush, he's put on the case of a missing cow.

Fairy is a unicorn. Now, that’s not so strange. But her powerful farts, please avoid at close range. Her farts are a burst of pink rainbow dust. But run away fast, if she lets one bust. Share this farting tale with loved ones. Adults are permitted to laugh, too.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series delivers an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices!

Arthur Dent hadn't had a day as bad as this since the Earth had been blown up. Depressed and alone, Arthur finally settles on the small planet Lamuella and becomes a sandwich maker. Looking forward to a quiet life, his plans are thrown awry by the unexpected arrival of his daughter. There’s nothing worse than a frustrated teenager with a copy of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy in their hands. When she runs away, Arthur goes after her determined to save her from the horrors of the universe. After all - he’s encountered most of them before.… Volume Five in the Trilogy of Five.