Funny Science Fiction Fantasy

Bingo Grabbins is a soddit who enjoys a comfortable life (apart from his feet, of course). But his contentment is disturbed when the wizard, Gandef, and a company of bizarrely Welsh dwarves drag him away on an adventure. They have a plot to raid the treasure hoard (or so they say) guarded by Smug, a large and very tedious dragon. Bingo is reluctant to take part in this insane venture, but a dwarven dagger held to his throat soon surprises even himself and off the companions go on a quest that seems truly epic.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series serves an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices! Our sixth volume features a Mad Amos story by Alan Dean Foster, a Harry the Book tale by Mike Resnick, and an Alexander Outland short by Gini Koch.

In this Caldecott Medal-winning tale set in Old Japan, a lively little woman who loves to laugh pursues her runaway dumpling - and must outwit the wicked three-eyed oni when she lands in their clutches.

A refrigerator repairman whose tools could accidentally destroy the planet. The best pot of chili ever, in the history of this or any other universe. Pizza so bad it’s been weaponized by aliens. Intergalactic Refrigerator Repairmen Seldom Carry Cash is a wild smorgasbord of dozens of delightful comic science fiction tales, with a healthy side of fantasy mixed in. Learn the delicious secrets of the universe through stories such as Amazingland, A Taste of Damsel, and Why I Bring a Bag Lunch Now. Thrill to the end of all things in Apocalyptic Nostrils of the Moon and Trailer Trash Savior. ...

Banged by a Pterodactyl Billionaire Erotic humor with a political twist; who says politics and erotica can’t go together. A handsome billionaire pterodactyl billionaire is running for Supreme Being in his world. He comes to use to wreak havoc and destruction to prove his worth as a pterodactyl leader. More books than one The first story is completely new and is erotic humor. There is one erotic horror (I warn ahead of time when it’s coming) in case you’re not into both horror and erotic. The other books are reworks of material published at one time or another. I might as well call ...

Remember the time we went to the Land of Lost Things to look for my lucky rabbit's foot and then we got lost too? That was one of our most exciting, surprising and knuckle-headed adventures ever. What? You don't remember? Well, have I got a story for you! It all started like this . . .

An expat living in South Korea is attracted to Korean farmer Dae-jin, because of his looks and his wealth. But a legendary trickster goblin, a dokkaebi, has its eyes set on the money-grabber to foil her plans. Will the girl get the money and tear Dae-jin away from his wife? Or, perhaps the dokkaebi has other plans....

Ornery octogenarian Richard, his associate Stanley, and his granddaughter Burke are world-class hunters of all things supernatural. They’ve faced monsters of every ilk, even overcome The Devil Herself, but now they face the most frightening challenge of all—spending the holidays with family.

Percy Jackson fans will embrace this humorous time travel adventure, the first in a series, about an iPhone malfunction that sends three kids back to 1776 in time to rescue George Washington. On Christmas Day, Mel finds General George Washington lying dead as a doornail in a stable. But Mel knows that George Washington must cross the Delaware River, or the course of American history will be changed forever. Could Mel’s iPhone have sent him back in time to 1776? And can Mel and his schoolmates, know-it-all Bev and laid-back Brandon, come to the rescue?

WHEN A VAMPIRE ACCIDENTALLY EXPOSES HERSELF TO SUNLIGHT... Can the sun god, Apollo, save her from destruction, and what will he expect in return? Reading this poignant, erotic short story, you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll shiver with juicy excitement. Intended for mature audiences 18+ only. Contains explicit descriptions of sexual acts, vampire trivia, crypto-erotica, and historical mead references. This book is 2,102 words long, and deeply moving. Or arousing. Or both.

Alex has a crush on the new teacher’s assistant, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to approach her. Too bad she’s crossed the University’s star player, and Duncan Shaw has no choice but to make her disappear. He plans to lay the blame on the local urban legend, but tonight he just might learn that some legends are real.

In consequence of a number of stunning catastrophes, Arthur Dent is surprised to find himself living in a hideously miserable cave on prehistoric Earth. However, just as he thinks that things cannot get possibly worse, they suddenly do. He discovers that the Galaxy is not only mind-boggingly big and bewildering but also that most of the things that happen in it are staggeringly unfair.

The Epic Conclusion of the Cyberpunk Fantasy Trilogy Cookie Rifkin escaped London, and in the sequel to Beta Bots, she infiltrates Stepford Corporation! Things turn nasty when Cookie Rifkin and her gang of misfit queers break into a landfill to resurrect her BFF Paula Rockwell. Paula serves up a cryptic menu, raises an army of nude womanoids, and becomes something like a Terminator. And while on the run, Cookie loses friend after friend until she’s left hanging alone. Inside Stepford Corporation, Wayne Dixon meets a human robotics engineer named Dr. Jean Fluke, who helps him access a ...

Odo and Eleanor are now officially knights, helped (and sometimes hindered) by their magical but rather difficult to control magical swords. But if they thought life as a knight was going to be easy, they were wrong! Before they know it, their first task is to tackle some ferocious bile wolves!

Born into a world with only seven days to live, Sim faces the same choice everyone does: How will he spend them? Is there something greater to hope for? A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.

Ivory has the perfect man… …from his microchip processor to his flesh-like exterior. Ivory hated that she loved her Christmas gift this year. Her sister gave her the perfect humanoid companion, but there’s a huge problem: he’ll never be able to say he loves her, no matter how much she loves him. Was her dream man a present or a curse? But when Ethan (Ivory’s Dream Droid) looks at her with those sweet blue eyes and secretly earns enough money to enter her in the city-wide bake-off offering a prize she drools over, she realizes she doesn’t care. He’s hers, and that’s the best ...

A heist story with a difference: Guardians of the Galaxy meets The Hobbit in this rollicking fantasy adventure. The dragons who once ruled over the land are dead. The motley crew that stole the dragons' gold and stumbled through a revolution are rich and praised as saviours. Everyone gets to live happily ever after, right? Well, it might have worked out that way if the dragons in Kondorra had been the only ones. If they hadn't been just the tip of the spear about to fall upon the whole world....

"Fun, fun, fun! Like the love child of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett!" Man plans, the Multiverse laughs! "It's like that book about anti-gravity. You can't put it down." "A story 14 billion years in the making!" "Finally, a treatment for readers suffering "Dirk Gently or Hitchhiker's Guide withdrawal!" "Not only is this case stranger than we imagine, it's stranger than we can imagine." No other detective is quite like Dr. Ziegfeld Zaggar, Quantum Detective -- and that's probably for the best. Zaggar and his reluctant, obsessively linear-thinking sidekick, Jack Robbins, investigate the ...

T-Bin has been traveling through space for years to deposit its passengers on a new planet, to give them a new life. But now, mere days from arrival, Tanner can’t shake the feeling that there’s a more sinister plot at work.

Monty Python meets Gladiator! Sand is destined for greatness...or so a pair of two-bit criminals would have him believe. After rescuing him from certain doom, Bess and Kaede embark on a scheme to game the War God Tournament. It’d be easier if Sand wasn’t an alcohol-soaked twit with a disturbing interest in mutton. Pitted against monsters, magic swords, and murderers galore, they soon realize winning the tourney is the least of their worries.