Funny Fiction Fantasy

WHEN A VAMPIRE ACCIDENTALLY EXPOSES HERSELF TO SUNLIGHT... Can the sun god, Apollo, save her from destruction, and what will he expect in return? Reading this poignant, erotic short story, you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll shiver with juicy excitement. Intended for mature audiences 18+ only. Contains explicit descriptions of sexual acts, vampire trivia, crypto-erotica, and historical mead references. This book is 2,102 words long, and deeply moving. Or arousing. Or both.

Every kid wants to laugh, but Max is the boy who can make it happen. He's also the kid who wants to spend the most boring school holidays ever coming up with the greatest prank of all time. Max is the funny kid, and it's time to prank the world! Conspiracy theories, crop circles, alien invasions, a mayor who has lost his marbles and the most un-fun fair in the universe are just some of the things in store for Max and his friends in this Funny Kid adventure.

Shapeshifter August Shade saved the world. At least, that’s what some folks are saying. According to the rumors, the personal effects repo man bested a vampire, a warlock, and a troll without even breaking a sweat. While his growing celebrity has been good for business, it’s also meant taking jobs farther from home. Now, the cranky shapeshifter is in farm country–definitely not his natural habitat–and mixed up with two feuding hag sisters, a loan sharking coblyn, and a mysterious woman with a very scary ex.

Mordak isn't bad as far as goblin kings go, but when someone - or something - starts pumping gold into the human kingdoms, it puts his rule in serious jeopardy. Suddenly he's locked in an arms race with a species whose arms he once considered merely part of a calorie-controlled diet. Helped by an elf with a background in journalism and a master's degree in being really pleased with herself, Mordak sets out to discover what on Earth (if indeed, that's where he is) is going on.

The fate of the world lies with one man: Bip Plunkerton. Talentless scientist and frequent drinker at the Empty Goat, young Bip Plunkerton will follow in his father’s footsteps as a volunteer...footsteps that have yet to return from the wilds of the wide world outside.

When his friends aren’t successful at spooking the children who visit the haunted house, Gus must present his unique superpowers to give them a scare!

Christmas stories Stories Collection ******************* Young and beginner reader’s kids would get the most enjoyment from the tree titles for Christmas we selected In We hope you enjoy reading them to your kids, grandchildren. SEA OF LOVE <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 Just off by the sea in a small shabby shack, Lived Sarah’s whole family, a big crowded pack, Two parents, three brothers, and three sisters, too; With less room inside as all the kids grew. OH DEAR SAID THE DEER ************************************* "Oh dear," said the deer, "I'm so cold, what a plight! I've searched for a...

Dane finds himself caught up in the midst of this ultimate quest to unlock the secrets of universal continuation. Enter a rich world and encounter what you least expect on this epic adventure.

Special Agent Niki Banks has called in a favor, and now Taylor has a young hacker with an attitude as an employee. Along with new monsters to kill, a business to get off the ground, a relationship with an annoying FBI handler to...deal with, Taylor is becoming a surrogate male figure for a role he didn't want. But he may be the best man for the job.

THE BEST NEST ******************** At night when Mom said to take a bath, And wash his hair with shampoo. He’d only wet his hair with water, And his mother never knew.

Title: "The Dead-End Gang vs the Alien Nazis!: Outrageous, Offensive, and Savage Stupid" Dumb and Dumber Meets the Three Stooges... Amateur cartoon trailer here: https://youtu.be/oE1t03nOej8 Get ready for a wild ride of laughter and chaos with "The Dead-End Gang vs the Alien Nazis!: Outrageous, Offensive, and Savage Stupid"! Meet Phuk, Blue, Dick, and Alice—a quirky foster family bound by their outrageous personalities and united by their mission to save the world from Nazi aliens. Phuk: The hot-headed Vietnamese telemarketer with a knack for martial arts and an explosive temper. Blue: ...

Oh no! A decade birthday is approaching, one with a big "0" in it, and he's losing it. Wake-up call required. Coulda. Woulda. Shoulda. Marvin Baines seemingly has it all: a loving family and a great job. He is about to turn forty, and just like that, the realization hits him--his own mortality is straight up the road. That's not his only problem. Suddenly he is unable to distinguish fantasy from reality, and his often quirky decision-making causes his whole life to begin to unravel. All he wants is an escape from his humdrum life. What he gets is something quite unexpected. "The humour is ...

A refrigerator repairman whose tools could accidentally destroy the planet. The best pot of chili ever, in the history of this or any other universe. Pizza so bad it’s been weaponized by aliens. Intergalactic Refrigerator Repairmen Seldom Carry Cash is a wild smorgasbord of dozens of delightful comic science fiction tales, with a healthy side of fantasy mixed in. Learn the delicious secrets of the universe through stories such as Amazingland, A Taste of Damsel, and Why I Bring a Bag Lunch Now. Thrill to the end of all things in Apocalyptic Nostrils of the Moon and Trailer Trash Savior. ...

Ivory has the perfect man… …from his microchip processor to his flesh-like exterior. Ivory hated that she loved her Christmas gift this year. Her sister gave her the perfect humanoid companion, but there’s a huge problem: he’ll never be able to say he loves her, no matter how much she loves him. Was her dream man a present or a curse? But when Ethan (Ivory’s Dream Droid) looks at her with those sweet blue eyes and secretly earns enough money to enter her in the city-wide bake-off offering a prize she drools over, she realizes she doesn’t care. He’s hers, and that’s the best ...

On a desperate journey to recover her sister's lost soul, Valkyrie Cain goes up against the High Sanctuary itself, and there's nothing Skulduggery Pleasant can do to stop her.

On each shore of the Great New World, the industrious Gnomes teamed up with an earthling named Trump and built really big resort golf hotels and gambling casinos, further enriching themselves (and I had a substantial piece of the action). How this Donald Trump got to the Five Moons is still a mystery. Everyone seems to like him. He is welcome to stay. Some of the clan leaders are even talking about letting him run the Great New World economy.

Alex has a crush on the new teacher’s assistant, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to approach her. Too bad she’s crossed the University’s star player, and Duncan Shaw has no choice but to make her disappear. He plans to lay the blame on the local urban legend, but tonight he just might learn that some legends are real.

It's the 25th century, and the American President has taken over the world. Meanwhile, after a cleaner unplugged his cryogenic freezing machine by accident, Detective Inspector Capstan wakes up to find that he's been in a state of suspended animation for more than 400 years. As he's forced to adjust to life in the future, he finds himself reinstated as a policeman, and together with the great-great-great-great-grandson of his former subordinate, Sergeant Dewbush, he's put on the case of a missing cow.

Ethan seems like a normal ten-year-old, but he has a secret. It’s not that he’s the one who accidentally filled the sunblock container with glue last summer or that he cracked the screen on his sister’s phone and blamed it on their baby brother. (Those things may have happened, but they’ve got nothing on this). No, Ethan’s secret is that he knows time travel is real—because his future self keeps coming back to visit him.

Born into a world with only seven days to live, Sim faces the same choice everyone does: How will he spend them? Is there something greater to hope for? A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.