Funny Fiction Fantasy

Don’t be like Ciara, a twelve-year-old girl living in the tiny village of Skael. When she used a spell from within this book, she ended up summoning a dragon. A DRAGON! Those things breathe fire! From their mouths! She’s obviously doomed. And don’t listen if Ciara tells you that dragons won’t hurt humans, and that they even once taught us magic, a thousand years ago. Definitely don’t pay any attention to the fact that the dragon she summoned, Scorch, might be willing to help rescue Ciara’s mother and free her village from the Emperor and his Warden, because it’s all obviously a big lie.

WHITE CAT BLACK CAT - The Hunter ******************************************** One hot summer day, in front of the fan The white cat was sweating as only cats can When outside the window he suddenly spied A tiny bird chirping on the other side. The cat stretched hard, from his back to his front, And thought, “What a great day to go out and hunt!”

A Pi/Sci-Fi/Comedy/Thriller introducing Philip Humphrey Chandler as the socially inept hero who likes beer, coffee and breasts - but not necessarily in that order. Phil is private investigator; he's got a computer and a comfy chair, and he knows how to use them. He doesn't get all sweaty chasing the bad guys; not when his fingers can do the work as he sips his coffee and looks forward to a nice cool pint. He doesn't wrestle the perp to the ground, with a quick quip and a steely gaze; not when he can sit in his comfy chair and dream about the girl behind the bar; the one with the breasts. ...

Kevin Austin has no plans of staying in the strange mountain town of Eden when he ends up becoming the new librarian after the previous one is murdered. He soon realizes this is no ordinary library. The books actually talk and fly around the rooms, and there's a ghost haunting the premises. Not to mention a collection of dangerous magical artifacts in the basement. In the town of Eden, Kevin encounters witches, zombies, demons, talking crows, angels, even gods and goddesses. Everyone in town seems to have secrets, including the alluring Olive, who Kevin falls for in book 1.

Sal the Cacophony has made few friends, but many enemies. Many, many enemies. When her magic was taken from her, she cried out for revenge. And a power she never understood promised her vengeance. A deal for a bloody price was made. And now the bill has come due. In one of the last free cities of the burned-out ruin of the Scar, Sal’s many foes—old and new—have hunted down her and her few allies—willing and otherwise—and all her plans to save them might not be enough.

A clueless daughter. An unhinged fae vampire. Can this genie resist the wish to flee midlife before she's retired from the land of the living? Ginny just wants some peace. But the beleaguered 40+ divorced genie faces the arduous test of preparing her oblivious daughter to gain the genie crown to prevent them from being hurled into a doom-filled destiny. All while battling an ancient fae vampire hell-bent on turning her life into a terminal tornado of turmoil. But when the earth-shattering secrets of her friends-turned-family start to unravel, they threaten not only Ginny's last nerve but ...

Doug wasn’t sure whether he should trust Satan. The red flag was that he said he was Satan. But the deal was good: Listen to Satan’s story in exchange for some donuts. And Doug only half-fulfilled his part of the bargain. But maybe he should have listened better, because during his friend Bryce’s next scheme (theft with light to moderate treason - the usual), Doug and the rest of his friends - Lulu (the fun one) and Charlene (the not fun one) - end up with a powerful artifact, a small metal cube with world-ending power that Lulu decorated with bunnies.

In consequence of a number of stunning catastrophes, Arthur Dent is surprised to find himself living in a hideously miserable cave on prehistoric Earth. However, just as he thinks that things cannot get possibly worse, they suddenly do. He discovers that the Galaxy is not only mind-boggingly big and bewildering but also that most of the things that happen in it are staggeringly unfair.

Teach your child patience! * * * * * * * * * "You forgot the mail?" The king yelled at the snail. But the snail stayed as calm as could be. He was not afraid of the king, you see. He knew where the gift was; he knew what to do. The monsters learned that patience pays off too. We are all familiar with the phenomenon of children wanting everything "here and now". This story describes just such a situation. I hope you and your children will enjoy it and learn from it. 子どもたちに辛抱について教えてくれる１冊！ 「郵便を忘れただと？」王様はカタツムリ君に...

Across the land, normal people are suddenly developing wild and unstable powers. Infected by a rare strain of magic, they are unwittingly endangering their own lives and the lives of the people around them. Terrified and confused, their only hope lies with the Sanctuary. Skulduggery Pleasant and Valkyrie Cain are needed now more than ever. And then there’s the small matter of Kitana. A normal teenage girl who, along with her normal teenage friends, becomes infected. Becomes powerful. Becomes corrupted.

When the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn't for them anymore, it's inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up. It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take good and evil, for example. For them, it's an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.

It's Christmas at St Mary's and time for the traditional illicit jump. Except this one is perfectly legal. It's Major Guthrie's last jump. To the Battle of Bannockburn, no less. An important moment in history for two nations - one that warrants everyone's full attention. But Max soon finds herself grappling with a near-lethal game of pooh sticks, another avian incursion and two turbulent teenagers intent on piloting their own illegal jump. And that's all before they even get near 14th-century Scotland. For this is St Mary's, and nothing is ever simple.

"Between the pages of this book lies the secret to the best-tasting chocolate in all the world. I promise, your taste buds will tingle. Your palette will sing! Oh no, have I accidentally tempted you to read this book? I will warn you, however, the most delicious things are never good for you...and this story is particularly scrumptious!"

Sky Simmons is 11 years old, mildly allergic to boring things, and absolutely incapable of leaving any mystery alone. Especially when a door shows up in her basement that wasn’t there yesterday. What begins as a weird creak and a whisper soon explodes into an unforgettable journey filled with living hallways, forgotten memories, and a janitor with a mop and a vendetta. In this thrilling and funny middle-grade tale, Sky faces her fears—and the fears of others—as she tries to save her brother, a lost friend, and maybe the entire world from becoming part of the hallway that never forgets.

Space Bimbos are human too, right? ...and Sam is finding he's their ultimate Alpha Male! in this EPIC collection! Sam's a geek for alien abduction stories. Heck, he's even been seeking them out, hoping to join the ranks. His dreams were never quite like this, though, as he finds himself abducted by a crew of gorgeous Bimbos from Space!. Seems as if this long-lost human civilization doesn't have a clue about real men, and Sam's more than happy to teach them the hot and steamy truth. He'll need courage, wisdom, and all the stamina he can muster to protect his new benefactors from the harsh ...

Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend - that's right, just one - at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like a mix of salted pork and Icelandic bog). The problem is, Greg isn't ordinary... he's actually a fantastical Dwarf! He discovers the truth the day his dad brings home a gross new tea - one that awakens bizarre abilities in Greg. Then a murderous Bro-Troll kidnaps his dad and Greg is whisked away to the Underground, where Dwarves have lived for centuries right beneath Chicago.

Klawde is not your average cat. He's an emperor from another planet, exiled to Earth. He's cruel. He's cunning. He's brilliant...and he's about to become Raj Banerjee's best friend. Whether he likes it or not.

When a passenger check-in desk at Terminal Two, Heathrow Airport, shot up through the roof engulfed in a ball of orange flame, the usual people tried to claim responsibility. First the IRA, then the PLO and the Gas Board. Even British Nuclear Fuels rushed out a statement to the effect that the situation was completely under control, that it was a one-in-a-million chance, that there was hardly any radioactive leakage at all and that the site of the explosion would make a nice location for a day out with the kids and a picnic.

Sinister marauders. A grief-stricken sea monster. And a magical midlife destiny hurtling into chaos. Ginny Smyth's so-called idyllic new life keeps throwing chaotic curveballs. The fraught forty-one-year-old genie tasked with safeguarding menacing magical artefacts she thought she'd seen it all—until nightmare-inducing beasts pushed the threat to terrifying new heights. And when a new friend’s fate teeters on a knife's edge, she scrambles to act fast before the blade falls, leaving nothing but devastation. With danger lurking at every turn, Ginny leans more heavily on her hot dragon-...

🌲💖 Love is wild… literally! Bigfoot in Love is a whimsical, mysterious, and heartwarming collection of short stories where romance meets the unknown! From gentle Sasquatches watching from the shadows to unexpected forest encounters, these tales will make you laugh, swoon, and maybe even believe in love beyond the ordinary! 🌿 Inside, you'll find: 🦶 A lonely cryptid finding his perfect match 🌕 A woman drawn to the deep woods… and something watching her 💌 Secret letters exchanged between a human and a hidden admirer 🔥 A hunter who becomes the hunted… by love! ✨ ...