Funny Fiction Fantasy

WHITE CAT BLACK CAT - The Hunter ******************************************** One hot summer day, in front of the fan The white cat was sweating as only cats can When outside the window he suddenly spied A tiny bird chirping on the other side. The cat stretched hard, from his back to his front, And thought, “What a great day to go out and hunt!”

Klawde is not your average cat. He's an emperor from another planet, exiled to Earth. He's cruel. He's cunning. He's brilliant...and he's about to become Raj Banerjee's best friend. Whether he likes it or not.

Rob's a traveling sales person by day and a conspiracy theory blogger by night. He's also got a weird side job for his buddy Shen, one that proves to be more than procuring trashy magazines and regional delights. One that uncovers the truth behind all those conspiracy theories and cryptids Rob is so fond of. Can he deal with reptilians, Nazis, and Hollow Earth?

When a passenger check-in desk at Terminal Two, Heathrow Airport, shot up through the roof engulfed in a ball of orange flame, the usual people tried to claim responsibility. First the IRA, then the PLO and the Gas Board. Even British Nuclear Fuels rushed out a statement to the effect that the situation was completely under control, that it was a one-in-a-million chance, that there was hardly any radioactive leakage at all and that the site of the explosion would make a nice location for a day out with the kids and a picnic.

On a desperate journey to recover her sister's lost soul, Valkyrie Cain goes up against the High Sanctuary itself, and there's nothing Skulduggery Pleasant can do to stop her. With Abyssinia's grand plan about to kick off in a night of magic, terror, and bloodshed, it falls to Omen Darkly to save the lives of thousands of innocent people. And as the madness unfolds around him, as hidden enemies step into the light, and as Valkyrie is sucked into a desperate, lawless quest of her own, he has no choice but to become the hero he never really wanted to be - or die in the attempt.

Don’t be like Ciara, a twelve-year-old girl living in the tiny village of Skael. When she used a spell from within this book, she ended up summoning a dragon. A DRAGON! Those things breathe fire! From their mouths! She’s obviously doomed. And don’t listen if Ciara tells you that dragons won’t hurt humans, and that they even once taught us magic, a thousand years ago. Definitely don’t pay any attention to the fact that the dragon she summoned, Scorch, might be willing to help rescue Ciara’s mother and free her village from the Emperor and his Warden, because it’s all obviously a big lie.

Book 6: the librarian of the supernatural town of Eden faces his greatest challenge yet when a powerful being abducts residents in what turns out to be an act of revenge. With the help of his hellhound companion, Fluffy, and his allies (the ghostbusters, the witch Olive, and the werewolf) Rip Van Winkle, Kevin must confront the monster and prevent it from exacting its revenge on Eden. Meanwhile, Kevin grapples with his own destiny as the anti-Christ and the looming threat of Armageddon.

A woman with a secret. A man of duty. A prophecy untold. Forced to seek shelter from the Highest, Ophelia and the Oneiroi must form an unlikely alliance with Fantasy. As bonds form, so does the undeniable truth. Fate awaits Ophelia and the Oneiroi, who can’t pursue their destinies without the help of their new ally. But when the Highest wreak havoc on them all, soon Ophelia discovers a new kind of destruction. When everything changes, when the light rises, Will Ophelia put her heart aside for the greater good, or will the Highest destroy everything they've created.

🌲💖 Love is wild… literally! Bigfoot in Love is a whimsical, mysterious, and heartwarming collection of short stories where romance meets the unknown! From gentle Sasquatches watching from the shadows to unexpected forest encounters, these tales will make you laugh, swoon, and maybe even believe in love beyond the ordinary! 🌿 Inside, you'll find: 🦶 A lonely cryptid finding his perfect match 🌕 A woman drawn to the deep woods… and something watching her 💌 Secret letters exchanged between a human and a hidden admirer 🔥 A hunter who becomes the hunted… by love! ✨ ...

Sky Simmons is 11 years old, mildly allergic to boring things, and absolutely incapable of leaving any mystery alone. Especially when a door shows up in her basement that wasn’t there yesterday. What begins as a weird creak and a whisper soon explodes into an unforgettable journey filled with living hallways, forgotten memories, and a janitor with a mop and a vendetta. In this thrilling and funny middle-grade tale, Sky faces her fears—and the fears of others—as she tries to save her brother, a lost friend, and maybe the entire world from becoming part of the hallway that never forgets.

"Between the pages of this book lies the secret to the best-tasting chocolate in all the world. I promise, your taste buds will tingle. Your palette will sing! Oh no, have I accidentally tempted you to read this book? I will warn you, however, the most delicious things are never good for you...and this story is particularly scrumptious!"

When the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn't for them anymore, it's inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up. It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take good and evil, for example. For them, it's an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.

Almost one year ago, Alice TodHunter Moon left her PathFinder village to become Apprentice to ExtraOrdinary Wizard Septimus Heap. Now, in faraway lands, the Castle is in peril. The brilliant blue stone is crumbling to dust, and both the witch Marisa and the wicked Red Queen have their eyes on the throne. But as Tod sets off on a hazardous journey to find a new Keystone, her life may be in the greatest danger of all. Can she save the Castle while evading the fate that befell her mother?

A Pi/Sci-Fi/Comedy/Thriller introducing Philip Humphrey Chandler as the socially inept hero who likes beer, coffee and breasts - but not necessarily in that order. Phil is private investigator; he's got a computer and a comfy chair, and he knows how to use them. He doesn't get all sweaty chasing the bad guys; not when his fingers can do the work as he sips his coffee and looks forward to a nice cool pint. He doesn't wrestle the perp to the ground, with a quick quip and a steely gaze; not when he can sit in his comfy chair and dream about the girl behind the bar; the one with the breasts. ...

Sinister marauders. A grief-stricken sea monster. And a magical midlife destiny hurtling into chaos. Ginny Smyth's so-called idyllic new life keeps throwing chaotic curveballs. The fraught forty-one-year-old genie tasked with safeguarding menacing magical artefacts she thought she'd seen it all—until nightmare-inducing beasts pushed the threat to terrifying new heights. And when a new friend’s fate teeters on a knife's edge, she scrambles to act fast before the blade falls, leaving nothing but devastation. With danger lurking at every turn, Ginny leans more heavily on her hot dragon-...

Alba is about to lose everything during an awful divorce...until she meets the Vampires of Emberbury, who dwell under an abandoned graveyard, stuck in Victorian times. They will make her a very interesting job offer, and she will get to meet Clarence, a mysterious vampire gentleman who thinks cloaks and top hats are still in fashion. With his help, Alba will figure out that, sometimes, the scariest monster isn’t the one with fangs.

Three series starters from the author Skyler Grant. The Laboratory is the story of an insane and science obsessed AI and the building of a facility deep beneath in the desert in a post apocalyptic world gone mad. Dungeon Crawl is Grant's first work, swords and sorcery LitRPG and the start to a world bending adventure. Persephone Falling is a cyberpunk tale of a satellite dweller brought to earth, a warrior who might find to find her place in a savage world.

Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend - that's right, just one - at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like a mix of salted pork and Icelandic bog). The problem is, Greg isn't ordinary... he's actually a fantastical Dwarf! He discovers the truth the day his dad brings home a gross new tea - one that awakens bizarre abilities in Greg. Then a murderous Bro-Troll kidnaps his dad and Greg is whisked away to the Underground, where Dwarves have lived for centuries right beneath Chicago.

Space Bimbos are human too, right? ...and Sam is finding he's their ultimate Alpha Male! in this EPIC collection! Sam's a geek for alien abduction stories. Heck, he's even been seeking them out, hoping to join the ranks. His dreams were never quite like this, though, as he finds himself abducted by a crew of gorgeous Bimbos from Space!. Seems as if this long-lost human civilization doesn't have a clue about real men, and Sam's more than happy to teach them the hot and steamy truth. He'll need courage, wisdom, and all the stamina he can muster to protect his new benefactors from the harsh ...

Banished to the edge of the supernatural world and left to die. A hero rises. Hell’s savior. Its one great hope. Yep, that’s me. I fought back against Beelzebub, stood in the face of tyranny, and even stopped murder and mayhem. No good deeds go unpunished. Immortal no longer, I’m in a fight for my life, and Hell’s leaders have handed the cheat codes to my enemies. Beelzebub wants to get even. And my magical halberd still refuses to grant me the power I’ll need to win the day. Decision time. Lie down and accept my fate, or punch death in the face? Libra is the key. He’s mapped ...