Funny Christmas

A cop, a pig, & a potty mouthed parrot walk into a bar. A Santa Claus thief, two special friends, pirates on the high seas, treasure hunts, lost dogs, an unruly pot-bellied pig, and a Jersey cow in the wrong place at the wrong time, spell trouble for Seal Island residents this Christmas. It is up to Gertrude, a pot-bellied pig, and her cohort, Peaches, a Jersey cow, to help save Christmas from a Grinch-like Santa Claus thief who decides that Seal Island is the perfect place for his base of operations while Betty & Reggie are out of commission having been kidnapped by smugglers on the high ...

"Mistletoe Detour," the latest entry in the Scottish Billionaire series by M. S. Parker, sends readers off on a hilarious, heartwarming holiday road trip. Blaze Gracen, a renowned Johns Hopkins professor, gears up for a festive family shindig in sunny San Ramon. However, Mother Nature has other ideas, and a surprise winter storm leaves his flight stranded in not-so-tropical Chicago. Enter Trisha Easton, a quick-witted New Yorker with a suitcase full of sass and a knack for turning lemons into spiked lemonade. Also stranded in Chicago, she opts for a daring, map-defying drive across the ...

Quirky Faith Pierson loves her life in rural Vermont. Especially in December when she throws herself into the local holiday festivities. Widower Graham Westfall doesn’t have time for Christmas. After missing the mark on his last ad campaign by a New York mile, his job now hangs in the balance. He has one month to come up with a new campaign or he’s out. He arrives in Holly Pointe planning to work the month away while his twin daughters spend time with their grandmother.When he discovers there’s no room at Gramma Ginny’s Inn, his only choice of lodging is the one place in Holly ...

After being together for 10 years, Sylvie and Dan have all the trimmings of a happy life and marriage; they have a comfortable home, fulfilling jobs, and beautiful twin girls and communicate so seamlessly, they finish each other's sentences. However, a trip to the doctor projects they will live another 68 years together, and panic sets in. They never expected "until death do us part" to mean seven decades. In the name of marriage survival, they quickly concoct a plan to keep their relationship fresh and exciting.

Mrs. Sookie Poole of Point Clear, Alabama, has just married off the last of her daughters and is looking forward to relaxing and perhaps traveling with her husband, Earle. The only thing left to contend with is her mother, the formidable Lenore Simmons Krackenberry. Lenore may be a lot of fun for other people, but is, for the most part, an overbearing presence for her daughter. Then one day, quite by accident, Sookie discovers a secret about her mother's past that knocks her for a loop and suddenly calls into question everything she ever thought she knew about herself, her family, and her future.

Teach your child patience !!! "You forgot the mail?!?!" The king yelled at the snail. But the snail stayed as calm as could be. He was not afraid of the king, you see. He knew where the gift was; he knew what to do. The monsters learned that patience pays off too. We are all familiar with the phenomenon of children wanting everything "here and now". This story describes just such a situation. I hope you and your children will enjoy it and learn from it. The forest monsters woke up & there was a sign on the tree. They had been invited to the Monster King’s birthday party. Everyone would ...

A single dad, a model, and a comedian walk into a bar.... They’re all Owen Brodie. It’s only funny if you aren’t the hilarious struggling comedian who has been hired to be his son’s nanny for the stand-up tour.

Is it possible to fall in love in one evening with a complete stranger? Ian Parker is about to find out. Ian is the proprietor of a successful local coffee house, in a suburb of Detroit. He wasn't expecting to fall head over heels in love with the beautiful, petite blonde that graced his presence, the weekend before Christmas, but he did. And how! When Nixie Davenport drove up to The Coffee Cabin on a Friday night, in a stolen car, she had no idea what kind of evening she was in for. The Coffee Cabin picks up where Alley Girl left off, only now Dalen Reese is part owner of The Coffee Cabin,...

She nips to modern-day London for a spot of Christmas shopping.... ...and ends up in 1958. Scarlett visits London’s Oxford Street to soak up the festive atmosphere, buy gifts, drink coffee and eat pastries. There, she meets Maisie, an elderly homeless woman who regales the tragic tale of how she was imprisoned for a murder she didn't commit. And lost the love of her life. Soon, Scarlett and her hunky husband are in December 1958 to avert a tragedy, armed only with mince pies and Christmas cake. If they fail, Maisie will spend thirty years in prison and miss out on marriage. Don't miss the...

Enjoy another slay-ride with this collection of Christmas horror stories. Creepy Christmas is the second volume in the series of holiday related terror penned by author Toby Bennett. A man who looked down the winding years of his tedious life and realized that he was more appalled by cheap cards and plastic trees than anything that might issue from the stygian depths of Dante’s pit. Join him this year for an alien invasion, an encounter with a yuletide psychopath and a traditional Wight Christmas. Not to mention the Boxing Day bonus. Four stories, a few laughs and one or two scares to ...

Escape the horrors of the festive season with this collection of zany and horrific tales. Thrill to the cries of bad children facing Krampus. Laugh along with Dr. Giggles holiday entertainer and quail before Frosty the incensed snowman. All with a healthy dose of idol worship, humour and irreverence… get this Christmas Cult Classic now!

For fans of the feel-good romantic stories found on the Hallmark Channel...read and enjoy the first three books in the best-selling Sugarplum Falls Romance series. Smart and sweet heroines, sexy and strong heroes. Get all the inspirational romance you're craving in the perfect snowy, holiday setting, Sugarplum Falls now. Christmas at Holly Berry Cottage: Math-whiz Chelsea has always had a thing for Wyatt, but he’s been declared off-limits by her overprotective brother. This year, however, brother is out of town, and Wyatt is showing some clear interest. When Chelsea needs a date to her ...

This Christmas, magic is just a touch away… When young Lucy picks out the perfect Christmas tree, she has no idea that her mother’s gift—five sparkling glass ornaments—holds a secret. The moment Lucy hangs the first one, she’s whisked away into a world of enchantment, mystery, and adventure. Trapped inside the magical ornaments, Lucy must summon her courage, make unlikely friends (including a mischievous monkey), and uncover the truth behind an old curse. Time is ticking, and she must journey through each magical realm before the clock strikes midnight on Christmas Eve. Will Lucy ...

I'm Kat Smith, former Secret Service, current postmaster, and awkward private eye in Ohia, Maui. I'm currently searching for a valuable, historical Hawaiian Christmas ornament gone missing, and I’m the six-foot-something center of controversy as our cozy small-town island mystery swirls with gossip, accusations, old feuds, and new friendships. I have my hot pilot boyfriend Mr. K, the Red Hat Society, and my beloved one-eared cat Tiki on the case—but I’m going to need all the help I can get to find the Queen's Ornament, or the fundraiser organized by my very own Aunt Fae will be a bust...

A charming and heartwarming romance, set in the breathtaking Brecon Beacons of Wales. Think Emmerdale meets Bridget Jones! Amy's world has fallen apart. Homeless and heartbroken after sacrificing her career for a cheating boyfriend, she’s sworn off men for good. When she's offered the use of quaint Well Cottage for six months, it feels like a lifeline—a chance to start over. Divorced architect Drew Giles and his farmer father believe they’re cursed when it comes to love— life has proven that time and again. Drew meeting an annoying new neighbour, who has already stolen his dog's ...

An evil business man, Mossman Bossman, has sacked all his staff four days before Christmas, and replaced them with robots. Furthermore, he has developed a machine to make all Christmas dinners tasteless. Only one man can stop him, Joe Drimmer. Can Joe elicit help from Santa Claus to prevent Bossman execute his evil plans?

🎄 Frost and Flour: The Meet Cute Story of Santa and Mrs. Claus 🎄 A deliciously spicy, adults-only Christmas romance filled with festive chaos, forbidden cookies, and a Santa who’ll have you on the naughty list in no time. Martha’s dreams of running a successful bakery melted faster than a snowflake on a hot cocoa mug. Broke and in search of a fresh start, she takes an unusual gig at the North Pole—home of sugarplum dreams, a toy factory powered by chaos, and one dangerously tempting Santa Claus. But Nick isn’t the jolly figure from bedtime stories. With broad shoulders, a ...

Hello, I’m Tangelo. I’m cute, I’m orange, and I love nothing more than a good ribbon tangle. Or any tangle, really. Unfortunately, my family of two-legs doesn’t always appreciate my creations. Well, they don’t understand art like I do, do they!? Just imagine, my biggest and best creation and the mum two-legs says, “Tangelo, you naughty kitty, what have you done?” Hey, what did she expect after accidentally shutting me in a room full of Christmas decorations? Ok, ok, I admit. I sneaked in. But honestly, what kitty could resist such temptation? Certainly not this tangle-loving ...

It’s Christmas Eve in New Chapel, Indiana. But this night will be anything but silent in a brand new Flower Shop Mystery Novella from New York Times bestselling author of Moss Hysteria and Yews With Caution. After being hired to deliver poinsettias to Churchill’s department store in downtown New Chapel, feisty flower shop owner Abby Knight finds herself mixed up in the disappearance of everyone’s favorite Santa Claus, Mr. Churchill himself. Promising Churchill’s daughter that the legendary Christmas Eve celebration will not go on without her father, Abby must recruit her whole staff...

Kids who love video games, especially Minecraft, will love the hilarious ‘Game on Boys’ series. Designed to appeal to the heart of any boy or girl, with its captivating story lines, whacky illustrations and side-splitting humor, as well as lots of awesome gaming content. They won’t want to put it down. Ryan James is crazy about video games and obsessed with Minecraft. Sometimes he really wishes he could live in a world like Minecraft instead of with his boring family who do boring things ALL THE TIME! In a moment of anger over his family's dreary holiday plans, Ryan wishes a little ...