Funny Christmas

Spark the dragon wants to sleep in his nice warm cave on Christmas Eve and wait for Santa to fill his stocking with coal. He does not want to get out in the dark, in a blizzard, but one little elf is VERY persuasive.

Hello, I’m Tippytoes. I’m magical, I’m yellow, and I love nothing more than a good magical spell. Unfortunately, my spells don’t always listen to me. Well, I’m only a fairy in training at the moment, you know?! Just imagine, while helping my fairy teacher, I sneeze a magical snowflake into a tree and the entire room erupts into a snowstorm.” Hey, I couldn’t have known that my teeny tiny sneeze would react to the spell my fairy teacher cast earlier, could I? Ok, ok, I admit. I was admiring the magical Christmas tree. But honestly, what kitty could resist such temptation? ...

‘A masterpiece. It’s like Jim Thompson and Irvine Welsh got together to write a Tony Black story’ BARRY GRAHAM When young Scots carpenter Joe is visited by the Wing Wizard Davie Cooper one Christmas Eve he gets the shock of his life—his partner is to give birth to a king that very night. Setting off through their scheme—guided only by an unusual, yet familiar, constellation—Joe and Mary-doll soon discover their shared passion for the opposing ends of the Scottish football terraces unites them in ways they could never have imagined. The Holy Father is a novelette delving into the...

For fans of the feel-good romantic stories found on the Hallmark Channel...read and enjoy the first three books in the best-selling Sugarplum Falls Romance series. Smart and sweet heroines, sexy and strong heroes. Get all the inspirational romance you're craving in the perfect snowy, holiday setting, Sugarplum Falls now. Christmas at Holly Berry Cottage: Math-whiz Chelsea has always had a thing for Wyatt, but he’s been declared off-limits by her overprotective brother. This year, however, brother is out of town, and Wyatt is showing some clear interest. When Chelsea needs a date to her ...

'Farting in a lift.... it's wrong on so many levels' A sh*t load of dad jokes that have been compiled and created by Joe King to entertain Dad's (and mums!) on whilst on the toilet. With over 500 jokes, you will love this! A superb gift to those dad's who think they are funny yet actually need some new jokes!

Teach your child patience !!! "You forgot the mail?!?!" The king yelled at the snail. But the snail stayed as calm as could be. He was not afraid of the king, you see. He knew where the gift was; he knew what to do. The monsters learned that patience pays off too. We are all familiar with the phenomenon of children wanting everything "here and now". This story describes just such a situation. I hope you and your children will enjoy it and learn from it. The forest monsters woke up & there was a sign on the tree. They had been invited to the Monster King’s birthday party. Everyone would ...

A model who lost the limelight. A hockey star benched from the game. Will a small-town Christmas celebration reveal a most unexpected gift? Going “Holly” Wood isn’t what America’s sweetheart, Krista Ankrom, had in mind when she made her annual Christmas trip to Holly Pointe, Vermont. Frustrated after losing another job to a younger rival, and fearing she’s walked her last runway, she’s hoping the happy site of her childhood Christmas pasts will be the perfect hideaway. But when asked to team up with NHL superstar Dustin Bellamy to save the town’s weeklong holiday celebration...

It’s Christmas Eve, and Poppy isn’t feeling much of the Christmas spirit. Her mind churning with doubt regarding her recent engagement to Marty, Poppy’s thoughts are a turbulent sea of anxiety and regret. When a stranger walks into Poppy’s shop, introducing herself as Noelle, she tells Poppy she’s looking for a potion called Holiday Cheer. Poppy is surprised because she’s never even heard of it. Almost as soon as Noelle walks into the shop, she disappears again, leaving only the recipe for the potion and a festive candy cane. After brewing the mystery potion, Poppy finds herself...

Dear Readers, Thank you for choosing this book! Before diving in, please note: this is NOT a children’s book. If you purchased this expecting a festive tale for little ones, please reconsider—this story was written with an adult audience in mind. Think of it as a glimpse into the real North Pole—without the sugarcoating. The characters here are as human as the rest of us, with all the complexities and imperfections that come with it. You’ll find adult language and themes that aren’t suitable for younger readers. You’ve been warned! Now, let’s dive into the story... The North ...

A promise of love, a miracle, and a treat that will tie your heart into knots! Let's begin with introducing you to the grumpiest Scrooge around – Army Veteran and former medic, Houghton. The gruff man served many tours in Afghanistan, but one thing can bring him to his knees faster than a foreign enemy. His wife, Jill. Except there is a problem. Now, the couple is facing a twist in their hard-earned Happily Ever After that neither expected, threatening the secret he's kept for months now. When the cookie crumbles, how do you pick up the pieces, realizing that things are still incredibly ...

When Bridie is snowed in over Christmas at Midwinter Hall, the season of goodwill hasn't got a chance as her gorgeous boss hates Christmas. Can Bridie perform her own Christmas miracle and persuade Ned to unite with the staff and the problem neighbour, to celebrate their Yuletide festivities together? After meeting a strange, otherworldly girl in the Midwinter woods at the solstice, will Bridie's own prejudices undergo a change and make her believe in the supernatural at last? Will the Midwinter Spirit affect them all? Join the residents of Midwinter Hall, including two dogs, a horse, two ...

This Christmas, magic is just a touch away… When young Lucy picks out the perfect Christmas tree, she has no idea that her mother’s gift—five sparkling glass ornaments—holds a secret. The moment Lucy hangs the first one, she’s whisked away into a world of enchantment, mystery, and adventure. Trapped inside the magical ornaments, Lucy must summon her courage, make unlikely friends (including a mischievous monkey), and uncover the truth behind an old curse. Time is ticking, and she must journey through each magical realm before the clock strikes midnight on Christmas Eve. Will Lucy ...

When Lisa Marsh reluctantly agrees to serve Thanksgiving dinner at the local community center, she’s not prepared for the chaos that ensues. Between the lively teenagers, fiercely independent veterans, eccentric seniors, and one particularly gruff homeless man named Pete, the evening spirals into a disaster. But when her best friend dares her to do more, Lisa accepts the challenge: she’s going to help Pete turn his life around—whether he likes it or not. Her plan? Simple: clean him up (starting with a shave), find him a job, and make him respectable. Pete, however, has no interest in ...

Fantasy, mystery, and adventure collide in this exciting story that will leave you believing in the magic of Christmas! The perfect book for kids ages 8 to 12 this holiday season. Leo spends his time drinking hot cocoa, inventing new toys, and celebrating Christmas––but he is no ordinary elf! Leo is Santa’s guardian and sworn protector of the North Pole. Leo's life is pretty great, until the day Santa Claus tells him the world’s Christmas Spirit is in danger. With Christmas just around the corner, Santa Claus sends Leo on a mission to find the evil Sorrow King, a powerful wizard who...

The Riptide is professional baseball’s newest team. It’s also the worst. The players are washed up, lazy, and should have retired a long time ago. Tommy is the team’s biggest fan. He goes to every home game, watches the away games on TV, and even blogs about the Riptide. He knows everything there is know about baseball but is the worst player in his local Little League. So how did he end up on baseball’s biggest stage? Will Panzell is the owner of the team. He’s also completely nuts. He lies, cheats, and schemes to sell tickets to Riptide games. His latest stunt is so bananas it ...

What sounds good at the bar may seem crazy the next day. Holly is the most studious of her sorority sisters, for her it's books, books, books. But when her hot billionaire hero gets bombarded with matchmaking mama antics, she steps up to help. So what if he’s attractive, elusive, and only wants temporary. She can be close to Chance without falling in love with him. Chance Kentwell likes to go fast and seize all of life’s joys. His only loyalties are to his stock portfolio, his graduation plans, and his billionaire brothers. When he sees his oldest brother speeding toward an engagement ...

Inspector Tuffle here, Scotland Yard. Speaking with the retiree seated before me in her Florida home. I have knowledge of a Christmas situation from 1964. Been keeping an envelope in my coat pocket while interrogating Ms. Helen Spencer on her 1960s experiences. It’s time to explore what happened. What exactly was Ms Spencer doing leading up to the Beatles Christmas shows of 1964? Who was the masked man? And why has she offered no information on it? All of London was scared, however she remains tight-lipped. A few things are certain: she was there, she worked with the Beatles… and no one...

The North Wind and the Sun ******************************* " One day in late spring with the sun shining strong She announced to the North Wind, “You do not belong!” “It’s time you must leave, so things can get hot.” But the North Wind said simply, “Oh, no, I will not.” ********** About Aesop’s Fables ****** Who was Aesop, and why are his fables famous all over the world? In fact, very little is known about this mysterious Ancient Greek figure. He is thought to have been a slave originally from Africa, but even that isn’t known for certain. But his stories, with their ...

What if Mr. Martin had proposed to Harriet in person instead of writing a letter, thus receiving an acceptance rather than a refusal? Thus begins Harriet's Secret... When Mr. Martin visits Harriet one morning and proposes, she joyfully says yes without hesitation. But when she meets with Emma to deliver the happy news, confusion abounds—Emma thinks it's Mr. Elton who has proposed, and upon Harriet's clarification that it was not Mr. Elton but Mr. Martin, Emma assumes that Harriet refused the man—and poor Harriet leads Emma to believe she had refused him! When Mr. Knightley offers his ...

It’s the first Christmas without their father, and Rán Hollander is determined to make it the most perfect Christmas ever for her family. She’s bought the huge turkey. She’s made the pieces for the gingerbread house and even found a perfect little Santa and Mrs. Santa for the doorstep.But then fate intervenes. The troubles start when Rán’s boss turns into Scrooge. Then the snowstorm of the century arrives and the turkey refuses to thaw. And that’s just the beginning. Join Rán for this uplifting, heart-warming tale of how an unexpected bunny, two lost girls, and a magic ...