Funny Cat

Everything is all Doug’s fault. The Horn of Destiny is missing from the Seraphim Symphonic practice room and the Apocalypse is set to begin prematurely. He always was a clumsy GA-1 (Guardian Angel First Degree). No wonder he never got promoted. Now the fate of the world rests in the hands of his human client, a mentally unstable trumpet player named Steve who takes all his advice from his pet cat Smokey. Oh, and someone on earth had the bright idea to run the dreaded Horn of Destiny through a 3-D printer and sell copies on eBay. God help us all!

You’re out. You’re proud. Now feed her like you mean it. Coming out of the closet is one thing—getting a girl in your kitchen? That’s a whole other adventure. Whether you're wooing a crunchy granola girl, a high-femme heartthrob, or that soft butch who finally texted back, this is your flirty, food-filled guide to impressing women, one delicious bite at a time. Packed with personality and powered by garlic (because of course), this cookbook serves up more than just recipes. It dishes out real advice—well, sort of—fierce flavor, and a little queer kitchen magic. From seductive ...

* BERYL AND FRED IN SPAIN now available, containing this book plus A Cat called Cheryl, with Fred and Beryl at a reduced price.* When Beryl and Fred decide to sell up and take a camper van tour around Spain with their lovable Cocker Spaniel, Ted, little do they realise how eventful their poorly planned trip will turn out to be. Intending to tour the whole country thoroughly in an anti-clockwise direction, one unexpected incident after another throws them off track and sees their faithful VW Camper, Vernon, transporting them to the south coast well ahead of any real or imagined schedule. ...

"Nuevo perro" **************** Fue un día terrible para el alegre y negro gato ¡Sus padres adoptaron a un perro, en un solo rato! Un caniche tan pequeño que no podía dañar a un ratón Actuaba como si mandara en la casa y creía tener la razón.

Grab your cat, get cozy and join Jack McCuddles on a mysterious adventure of pure fluffy escapism. One exceptionally cute cat with magical powers is our only hope in foiling a despicable plot. That cat is Jack McCuddles and in his paws, we don’t stand a chance. Behind a wall of lies in an ever-changing house, the evil professor gives Jack the ultimate feline comforts of warm fires and platefuls of food. Will these feline luxuries be enough to distract Jack from the professor’s real purpose? However, an encounter with a mysterious mouse is about to change everything for Jack, although by...

A Cupcakes-And-Crime Caper Roger Owen’s business isn’t doing well, and when he takes his wife and son to glitzy, glamorous Las Vegas for some quality family vacation time, he brings along a surprising +1: his mistress! "Winters will have you giggling into your book!" Life seems to pick up for Roger when he wins a huge jackpot… until someone gleefully kills him on the casino floor. Caught in the hot seat as suspect number one, Roger’s wife Wendy hires Tiffany and Ian to clear her name and to solve the mystery of who really killed Roger Owen—even though it may very well be black ...

The North Wind and the Sun ******************************* " One day in late spring with the sun shining strong She announced to the North Wind, “You do not belong!” “It’s time you must leave, so things can get hot.” But the North Wind said simply, “Oh, no, I will not.” ********** About Aesop’s Fables ****** Who was Aesop, and why are his fables famous all over the world? In fact, very little is known about this mysterious Ancient Greek figure. He is thought to have been a slave originally from Africa, but even that isn’t known for certain. But his stories, with their ...

A Felix Nightwhisker Mystery – A charmingly gritty feline noir series packed with sharp claws, sharper wit, and shadowy secrets. Step into the whiskered world of Felix Nightwhisker, a hard-boiled feline detective with a knack for uncovering secrets others would rather keep buried. Set in the moody streets of Whisker City, where alley cats barter in whispers and the scent of treachery lingers behind every fish market and fencepost, Felix prowls the night to solve the cases no one else dares touch. Each mystery delivers a tightly-woven tale of suspense, unexpected humor, and unforgettable ...

📚World-famous author Cressida Vance is rich, rude, and really bad at finishing her series. When she crashes into the cozy town of Mariposas to open a Very Serious Bookstore™, tensions rise quickly. But when she bails on a local book club Q&A and turns up dead, the real mystery begins... featuring: 💸 An old-money inheritance 🖋️a scandalous lie 🔍and a whole town full of suspects Murder’s on the menu—and everyone’s reading between the lines. 🍰🔍 Perfect for fans of mysteries with bite, bookish chaos, and small-town snark. Praise for A.R. Winters: "The perfect balance...

Isla only meant to tweak time a little for her homework assignment—not break it entirely. But now, she’s stuck in an endless Monday, her magical town is spiraling into chaos, and no matter what she does, the clock keeps resetting! With mischievous magic on the loose, Isla, her sassy talking cat Midnight, and her best friend Lacey must embark on a whirlwind quest to fix time itself. Between dodging enchanted furniture, outsmarting a riddle-loving Guardian of Time, and tracking down the elusive Hourglass of Ages, Isla quickly realizes that magic isn’t about control—sometimes, the best...

A funny, charming and moving book that will keep you hooked until the end. This is the story of a cat called Mateo and his owner, a poor bricklayer who struggled to make ends meet. But it is also the story of three children and their unpredictable behaviour, and the story of an old lady and her peculiar little world, and the story of a beautiful model and her crazy boyfriend… Age 9+

In Southport, North Carolina, a Christmas tale unfolds when 80-year-old George Ivers is left alone at home while his wife visits a sister for five days. George has to watch the cat he dislikes, resulting in a series of comical escapades. Picture a man who's a blend of the gruffness of Archie Bunker, the stone-age charm of Fred Flintstone, and the nearsighted blunders of Mr. Magoo, and you've got George. His days are filled with hilarious mishaps, from a battle of wits with a cheeky seagull to the relentless interruptions by neighbors. George's quest for peace is perpetually sabotaged by the...

Apparently, I've been slacking on the job as a paralegal, even though the firm doesn't know that I'm secretly working as the area's premier Pet Whisperer P.I. to solve our toughest cases behind the scenes. Now, they've hired an intern to "help" me manage my workload.... But what the partners don't realize is that they've let a nefarious criminal into our offices. Trust me, Octo-Cat can smell this guy's stink from a mile away. The worst part? I'm pretty sure he can talk to animals too...and he most definitely isn't using his talents to solve crimes and defend the innocent.

This book, Funny Cat Stories 2, will make you laugh and most likely think about your own funny cat stories! A lot of laughs are awaiting you when you start listening to this book!

Cassie and Elvis have Magnolia Bay's boardwalk purring like a kitten with fresh cream. With her bookstore thriving and friends by her side, Cassie's newest pride and joy are a pair of fall boots that don't just make folks green with envy—they're brimming with a magic only she knows about. Will they be enough to help her solve the latest murder in Magnolia Bay? The holiday weekend takes a dark turn when a local mom is found murdered. With secrets buried deeper than treasure and an investigation ally spilling them recklessly, danger's now tailing Cassie and her crew like a shadow on a hot ...

A true romance memoir. "This is like drinking tea and honey on a cold day." When tragedy struck, I thought for sure that my own life was at an end. I was wrong. This is the true story of how two stray rescue cats and a woman named Kitty, whom I finally met after a wild ride of internet dating, brought love, romance, and laughter back into my life. Love was then. Love is now. Love is forever. WINNER of the 2018 Stephen Memorial Award FINALIST for the 2014 RONE AWARD If you love reading feel-good memoirs, then don't miss THE THREE KITTIES THAT SAVED MY LIFE, where "Mike Meyer pens a tender ...

Grab your cat, get cozy and join Jack McCuddles on a mysterious adventure of pure fluffy escapism. What do you get when all the great detectives are busy? You get the worst and when they aren’t available? There’s Jack McCuddles, the cutest, magical cat in the world and Charlie McMoose, a dubiously clever, mouse detective. Only a desperate person would hire these two, and Lord McBedbugs is that person. He has a vampire hamster problem in his hotel that needs solving. Do vampire hamsters exist? If so, have they nothing better to do than to go around biting Lord McBedbugs’ guests? Can ...

📖 The Cat Burglar’s Guide to Love: A Laugh-Out-Loud Romantic Comedy Mystery 🔥Enemies to Lovers 🐱 Cozy Mystery Meets Rom-Com 🍽️ A Grumpy Chef & a Mischievous Food Critic Finn Carmichael is a Michelin-starred chef who thrives on precision, order, and absolutely zero distractions. Lottie Fairweather is a fearless, fast-talking food critic who’s never met a mystery—or a man—she couldn’t crack wide open. When 500 porcelain cat figurines vanish from Finn’s restaurant overnight, the crime scene turns into a tabloid sensation—and Finn’s worst nightmare. The last thing ...

Alice Munroe is a private investigator in the quaint New England town of New Shrimpton. Her secret? She’s also a witch. Her latest case tasks her with proving the existence of “The Old Hag Who Lives in the Woods,” a legend she’s heard about since her youth. Almost as interesting is the client who hired her, disgraced former TV host, Redford Holmes, Paranormal Investigator! That same week, Alice’s friend and fellow witch, Selene, has invited her to a family party. It seems there’s an ulterior motive for the invite—namely introducing Alice to Selene’s hunky cousin, Finn. ...

Ivory has the perfect man… …from his microchip processor to his flesh-like exterior. Ivory hated that she loved her Christmas gift this year. Her sister gave her the perfect humanoid companion, but there’s a huge problem: he’ll never be able to say he loves her, no matter how much she loves him. Was her dream man a present or a curse? But when Ethan (Ivory’s Dream Droid) looks at her with those sweet blue eyes and secretly earns enough money to enter her in the city-wide bake-off offering a prize she drools over, she realizes she doesn’t care. He’s hers, and that’s the best ...