Fishing Humor

"Levi the Fish Who Wasn’t Perfect" makes you laugh even when you’ve listened to it one hundred times. It’s about a handicapped fish, and it’s hilarious. "Samson the Flying Pig" and other stories from Rose of Sharon Farm is a collection of short reminiscences from Dr. Zebulun’s old farm, humorous but with some instances of attacks on the farm animals by wild animals (which really happened and happens). One of the attacks was on Rooster Brown, who not only survived the attack but became the "little David" of the farm after that (his "Goliath" was a neighbor’s boxer dog).

On the Tindim's island home, Bottle Mountain is growing terrifyingly tall with rubbish. So tall that one night it breaks away with Barnacle Bell and Granny Shell clinging on tightly as they float off over the waves. None of the other Tindims know where Bottle Mountain is or how to help their friends find their way home....

Stuck on a small planetoid, we find Major Joachim Merlot. He's the military equivalent of a street sweeper, defending Earth against an alien race of stinking fish-like creatures. Merlot isn't interested in being any kind of hero - he just wants to return home and see who won the office betting pool. His odds of making it back alive are only one in 16, but that doesn't matter. He's been issued a handy dandy Battle Ready Android with the fire power of an entire platoon. The only problem? He can't let the android think too much.

While the interstellar war with the Kasago escalates like a monkey's weenie in a Viagra testing lab, we find Major Joachim Merlot and his Battle Ready Android defending Earth against an alien race of stinking fishy creatures. This time Merlot is on a heavily fortified colony planet where everyone figured they were safer than a rectory shower room. As you may have guessed, their assumptions about being penetrated were a bit off course. Sort of like a blind chimp driving with a nine iron.

As the interstellar war with the Kasago heats up like a Bengay-laminated jockstrap, we find Major Joachim Merlot and his battalion of battle-ready androids yet again defending Earth against an alien race of stinking fishy creatures. Unlike his last mission, his odds of making it back alive have improved - sort of. As much as the military would prefer him dead, he's more valuable for a bogus court-martial. Is he guilty? Who cares!

Oscar Otter builds his very own slide, far up in the mountains. No one can bother him there. Not even his family. But Oscar doesn't know he is in danger. His enemy, the fox, is watching. But what the fox doesn't know is that someone is watching him.

An unusual solution to Road Rage is proposed in this delightful telling of a long-suffering family's wild trip to Grandma's house. Based (loosely) on a true event, this story will have you riveted to your seat as an unexpected ride-along companion puts the driving skills of the father to the test.

Did you know that the deepest parts of the ocean are over one mile deep - too far down for any sunlight to reach? That's where Blobfish lives. But this book isn't about Blobfish...or is it?

Years have passed. Literally, six years have passed for this young boy who is finally of sufficient height to ride. And what a ride it will be! The upcoming experience will form a bond between father and son that forever will live in the annals of family lore. This roller coaster, aptly named "Old Rickety" represents a rite of passage and the boy's entrance way into all that is fun.

What happens when a room full of kids find themselves without a junior-church teacher? They choose one of their own crowd to take her place, of course! Twelve-year-old Kirby McCook, mentored by his grandfather, leads his rambunctious friends through the Bible in this creative and fun Bible storybook. Bible stories laced with middle-grade humor help teach kids that Jesus has been part of the story from the beginning and can be found throughout the Bible, from Genesis through Revelation.

Jolly Joke Books presents Under the Sea Jokes: For Kids - 125 child-friendly kids under-the-sea jokes! These jokes will bring smiles to children’s faces. Enjoy this audiobook with the children in your life.

Meet Supertato! The supermarket superhero with eyes everywhere. It’s Sports Day in the supermarket and all the veggies are in training. Everyone has been practising hard and is ready and raring to go. However, a new competitor joins the event, accompanied by The Evil Pea, and is determined to win all the prizes. Things don’t seem quite right… but will Supertato be able to foil his nemesis’ plan in time?

When Frankie and Drew get in an argument about how ancient Egyptians really walked, there's only one way to set the record straight - a quick time-travel adventure! But what happens when Frankie and Drew's precious Sonic Suitcase ends up buried inside a booby-trap-ridden pyramid? There's only one way to get it back - by going inside and hoping they can make it out again.

When Frankie and Drew get in an argument about how ancient Egyptians really walked, there's only one way to set the record straight - a quick time-travel adventure! But what happens when Frankie and Drew's precious Sonic Suitcase ends up buried inside a booby-trap-ridden pyramid? There's only one way to get it back - by going inside and hoping they can make it out again.

When Frankie and his best friend, Drew, head back to the Middle Ages for one last trip with the Sonic Suitcase, they’re in for some strange surprises. What kind of knight rides a pig into battle? Who’s the mysterious stranger who turns up right when Frankie’s in serious trouble? And what could possibly make Drew want to stay in the Middle Ages forever?​ Only one thing is certain Frankie’s last time-travel adventure will be one to remember....

The Short(Cuts) is a collection of seven unique and individual stories that range across all different genres. Sometimes humorous and other times sad, the collection represents some of the smaller works that Matthew Fish has written in the past 18 years. They range in length from 1,000-word shorts to 30,000-word pieces that have been dated to show a progress and change in both narrative style and tone.

Once upon a time, a fairy tale went very wrong! This new twist on a traditional children's story is packed with fun. In this whale of a tale, the Big Bad Shark is looking for a tasty snack...when he comes across three delicious-looking narwhals! The loveable, pointy-horned creatures—show-off Spike, arty Spiral, and shy Stubby—discover a sunken pirate ship, and are using the parts to build their own homes. Now they are out of their depth, locked in a battle of wits with the munching, crunching villain.

Ted’s missing briefcase has become a cause célèbre.Ever since the day he left it behind in the woods, and someone else took it, it’s remained his primary mission to get it back. And now, that undertaking has lead him to foreign climes and a daring rescue mission. Many people have asked Ted what’s in the briefcase, and why getting it back means so much to him. Maybe the answer lies with the film supremo Quentin Tarantino, who said the value of the briefcase in his classic 1994 movie Pulp Fiction lay not in its contents, but actually in the briefcase itself.

The fourth book of Jesper's wonderfully wicked adventures is chock-a-block full of all kinds of fishing tales. There are mackerels to be sure, but also a creature a little bit furrier than a fish running loose on the beach. And it's up to Jesper (aka Detective J. Jinx) to save the day before it turns into a fishy nightmare!

What if Jack and Jill had been playing on a nice soft sand dune instead of that treacherous hill? And suppose Mary's pet wasn't really a lamb. What if Mary had a little...clam? Those questions - and more - are gleefully answered in Mother Osprey: Nursery Rhymes for Buoys & Gulls. This collection retells Mother Goose rhymes and celebrates America's coastlines and waterways - from sea to shining sea.