Family Humor

As the child of a Hooters waitress and an ex-pro wrestler, Margo Millet's always known she’d have to make it on her own. So she enrolls at her local junior college, even though she can’t imagine how she’ll ever make a living. She’s still figuring things out and never planned to have an affair with her English professor—and while the affair is brief, it isn’t brief enough to keep her from getting pregnant. Despite everyone’s advice, she decides to keep the baby, mostly out of naiveté and a yearning for something bigger.

Author Katherine Applegate’s stories about Roscoe Riley are popular with young readers who know what it’s like to get into trouble—accidentally. When the local bookstore holds a contest to guess the weight of a giant pumpkin, the prize is a bunch of books for the winner’s school library and a ton of candy. Roscoe likes books and candy, so he decides to make a guess. But a bad-luck black kitten at the bookstore keeps getting in his way.

Teddy Telemachus is a charming con man with a gift for sleight of hand and some shady underground associates. In need of cash, he tricks his way into a classified government study about telekinesis and its possible role in intelligence gathering. There he meets Maureen McKinnon, and it's not just her piercing blue eyes that leave Teddy forever charmed but her mind - Maureen is a genuine psychic of immense and mysterious power.

Holy unanticipated occurrences! It begins, as the best superhero stories do, with a tragic accident that has unexpected consequences. The squirrel never saw the vacuum cleaner coming, but self-described cynic Flora Belle Buckman, who has read every issue of the comic book Terrible Things Can Happen to You!, is the just the right person to step in and save him. What neither can predict is that Ulysses (the squirrel) has been born anew, with powers of strength, flight, and misspelled poetry - and that Flora will be changed too.

Adrian Mole has entered early middle age and is now 'the same age as Jesus was when he died' (33). Father to the grammatically challenged Glenn, and William, who takes a 'Big Boy Arouser' condom to nursery school as his innocent contribution to a hot air balloon project.

Bernadette Fox is notorious. To her Microsoft-guru husband, she's a fearlessly opinionated partner; to fellow private-school mothers in Seattle, she's a disgrace; to design mavens, she's a revolutionary architect, and to 15-year-old Bee, she is a best friend and, simply, Mom.

Then Bernadette disappears. It began when Bee aced her report card and claimed her promised reward: a family trip to Antarctica. But Bernadette's intensifying allergy to Seattle - and people in general - has made her so agoraphobic that a virtual assistant in India now runs her most basic errands.

Alexander’s dad has a new job 1,000 miles away, so now his family has to move. Alexander would rather have poison ivy. Maybe he could live with the Baldwins and their dog. He’s always wanted a dog. How can he leave Rachel, his favorite baby-sitter, who taught him to stand on his head and whistle with two fingers (but not at the same time)? And his best friend Paul, who’s like a brother, except that he doesn’t call Alexander "puke-face" like his real brother does? Just as Alexander is ready to hide from his parents, Dad decides that a boy might need a dog....

Meet Harold Fry, recently retired. He lives in a small English village with his wife, Maureen, who seems irritated by almost everything he does, even down to how he butters his toast. Little differentiates one day from the next. Then one morning the mail arrives, and within the stack of quotidian minutiae is a letter addressed to Harold in a shaky scrawl from a woman he hasn’t seen or heard from in twenty years. Queenie Hennessy is in hospice and is writing to say goodbye.

Marnie MacGraw wants an ordinary life - a husband, kids, and a minivan in the suburbs. Now that she’s marrying the man of her dreams, she’s sure this is the life she’ll get. Then Marnie meets Blix Holliday, her fiancé’s irascible matchmaking great-aunt who’s dying, and everything changes - just as Blix told her it would. When her marriage ends after two miserable weeks, Marnie is understandably shocked.

700+ Hilarious Jokes for Seniors and Adults of All Ages – Laugh Out Loud with Timeless Grandpa Humor! Do you love a good laugh? What if you could brighten up any day with side-splitting jokes that are both cheesy and clever? "Grandpa Jokes" is packed with over 700 laugh-out-loud jokes that are perfect for sharing with friends and family or enjoying by yourself whenever you need a hearty chuckle! Why This Book is a Must-Have: Perfect for Any Occasion: From family gatherings to casual get-togethers, these jokes are guaranteed to lighten the mood and create joyful memories. Fun and Clean ...

Willy Wonka's famous chocolate factory is opening at last! But only five lucky children will be allowed inside. And the winners are: Augustus Gloop, an enormously fat boy whose hobby is eating; Veruca Salt, a spoiled-rotten brat whose parents are wrapped around her little finger; Violet Beauregarde, a dim-witted gum-chewer with the fastest jaws around; Mike Teavee, a toy pistol-toting gangster-in-training who is obsessed with television; and Charlie Bucket, our hero, a boy who is honest and kind, brave and true, and good and ready for the wildest time of his life!

An ambitious mother puts her art career on hold to stay at home with her newborn son, but the experience does not match her imagination. Two years later, she steps into the bathroom for a break from her toddler's demands, only to discover a dense patch of hair on the back of her neck. In the mirror, her canines suddenly look sharper than she remembers. Her husband, who travels for work five days a week, casually dismisses her fears from faraway hotel rooms.

Beginning with his parents' decision to move away from the corrupting influences of town, and to settle instead in rural Virginia, Metcalf's narrator leads the listener through a gallery of scabrous youths and callous adults driven mad by the stubborn soil of the New World. Eloquently misanthropic, the narrator of Against the Country fully inhabits the style of the old timer's winding yarn even as he sabotages all that the forces of provincialism stand for from within.

Librarian Martha Storm has always found it easier to connect with books than people—though not for lack of trying. She keeps careful lists of how to help others in her superhero-themed notebook. And yet, sometimes it feels like she’s invisible. All of that changes when a book of fairy tales arrives on her doorstep. Inside, Martha finds a dedication written by her best friend—her grandmother Zelda—who died under mysterious circumstances years ago. When Martha discovers a clue within the book that her grandmother may still be alive, she becomes determined to discover the truth.

Lenny Marks is excellent at not having a life. She bikes home from work at exactly 4pm each day, buys the same groceries for the same meals every week, and owns thirty-six copies of The Hobbit (currently arranged by height). The closest thing she has to a friendship is playing Scrabble against an imaginary Monica Gellar while watching Friends reruns. And Lenny Marks is very, very good at not remembering what happened the day her mother and stepfather disappeared when she was still a child. The day a voice in the back of her mind started whispering, You did this.

Four children's Great books, all rolled into one. best for bedtime stories beginner / early reader poetry for kids. best animals stories, value tales

A light, cozy mystery series in a quaint Bavarian Christmas town with a fun loving, amateur female sleuth, her adorable rescue cocker spaniel, and enough garden gnomes to fill a museum. Book 1 - Deck the Santa Chloe Carson is excited for her long-awaited family reunion. But as they gather in a snow-clad village to plan their aging mother’s dream of opening a restaurant, the old lady’s habit of spreading garden gnomes around town leads to a panicked pilgrimage. And the mayhem continues when their visit to the nutcracker museum reveals Kris Kringle has come to an unmerry demise. With a ...

I knocked up my one-night stand. Well, it started as a one-night stand. Veronica left the next morning with a promise: she'd knock on my hotel room door the next time she passed through Las Vegas. Color me shocked when she actually followed through. The year after that, too. And the year after that. Is a once-a-year fling a thing? Because we perfected it. Until last night—when she showed up with a baby. Our baby. I didn’t even know Veronica’s last name, and now we have a daughter together. One look into those big brown eyes and I was done for. Forget casual. I want the whole damn ...

Korede is bitter. How could she not be? Her sister, Ayoola, is many things: the favorite child, the beautiful one, possibly sociopathic. And now Ayoola’s third boyfriend in a row is dead. Korede’s practicality is the sisters’ saving grace. She knows the best solutions for cleaning blood, the trunk of her car is big enough for a body, and she keeps Ayoola from posting pictures of her dinner to Instagram when she should be mourning her “missing” boyfriend. Not that she gets any credit. Korede has long been in love with a kind, handsome doctor at the hospital where she works.

From the master of tragicomedy and award-winning author of Skippy Dies: a tour de force new novel about family, fortune, and the struggle to be a good person when the world is (maybe) ending. Irresistibly funny, wise and thought-provoking, a state-of-the-nation novel about one unhappy family in the midst of meltdown.