Dragon Fantasy Humor

Here I am, on the butt end of thirty—the black sheep, the screw-up, the major disappointment—fresh out of rehab and trying to get my crap together. *sigh* Dr. Baker, my shrink, says I should quit obsessing over my dream guy because he’s not real. He was merely a hallucination during a psychotic break I suffered nearly twenty years ago. *sigh* Well, when Dream Guy comes walking into Mimi's Cabana, a local tiki bar, maybe I’m hallucinating again. And maybe I don’t care. *sigh* I really am hopeless. This is a short, standalone shifter novella set in the P.O.L.A.R., Cybermates, and ...

Who knew justice was so poetic? Maverick has a rep as a hard-boiled investigator. He’s never had a case he’s been unable to crack. When a decade-old cold case falls on his desk, his homicide investigation leads to Sunkissed Key, and to his main suspect, Sinclair Townsend— his mate. For almost ten years, Sinclair has managed to deny the events that forever changed her life. But when her house of cards falls, it implodes. By a twist of fate, Kade Maverick is her mate—and her nemesis. B.E.A.R.S. (Bruin Evaluation Assessment and Reconnaissance Specialists) SERIES READING ORDER: 1. ...

A retired group of legendary mercenaries get the band back together for one last impossible mission in this award-winning debut epic fantasy. Kings of the Wyld: Booktrack Edition adds an immersive musical soundtrack to your audiobook listening experience!

Arrietty in Underland, A Warped Alice in Wonderland Reimagining. First book in a new standalone series in the Darkly Sweet world! Arrietty Lovecraft, Penny’s hacker, put all her unhealthy and unethical adventures behind her and is a quiet potions witch in Darkside until a killer with her face, her tech, and her genetics frames her for a murder and a kidnapping. The Dragonlord of Death comes with a deal, and while Arrietty knows better than to make a deal with death or a dragon, someone has to rescue her good friend from the Spider of Underland before she becomes another mad inhabitant of ...

I never thought I would date a dragon, or feed him chicken strips late at night, but life has gotten interesting. My steady dragon - you may know him as Lord Zavryd’nokquetal, but I get to call him Zav - is offering to take me to the elven homeland to meet my father and learn to harness the magic in my blood. Sure, I’m wary about his plans to force the elves to train me, but I need every advantage I can get. Especially when vampire attacks start cropping up all over Seattle, and my friend and business partner, Dimitri, disappears.

This audio collection compiles the hilarious escapades of Hiccup and his dragon Toothless from books 4-6. Will Hiccup find the rare cure that will save Fishlegs from the deadly bite of the Venomous Vorpent? Can he return the Fire Egg to the Volcano, stop the Volcano from erupting, and save the Tribes from being wiped out by the terrible sword-claws of the Exterminators? Can he escape the Library Labyrinth and evade the Driller Dragons and Madguts and his Murderous Tribe?

In the town of Squashbuckle, just about anything can happen, and when Henry Penwhistle draws a mighty Chalk Dragon on his door, the dragon does what Henry least expects - it runs away. Now Henry's art is out in the world for everyone to see, and it's causing trouble for him and his schoolmates Oscar and Jade. If they don't stop it, the entire town could be doomed! To vanquish the threat of a rampaging Chalk Dragon, Sir Henry Penwhistle, Knight of La Muncha Elementary School, is going to have to do more than just catch his art - he's going to have to let his imagination run wild.

It's not easy to live in a world ruled by dragons. The taxes are high, and their control is complete. But for one group of bold misfits, it's time to band together and steal back some of that wealth. No one said they were smart.

Bestselling authors Candace Ayers and Kym Dillon bring you SHORT "lunchtime quickie" reads—condensed romances intended to be read in under 2 hours! Paranormal passion only a shifter can deliver. Let the games begin. I'm minding my own business when in walks the hottest silver fox I've ever seen. He claims I'm his mate. No thanks. I don't do mates. Especially not arrogant Alpha types. Been there, done that—it left me institutionalized. But those eyes, that smile... Makes a menopausal gal yearn for what she's been missing. He says I'm the only one for him. But doesn't he deserve a fertile...

The spirit of a warrior lies deep inside a bard. Deep down. Way, way down. Jonas wakes up each day regretting his position as the king’s bard. He dreams of escaping the kingdom and returning to life as a traveling musician with his best friend Elrick. But when his love Bree is taken prisoner in the castle, he and Elrick must act. Their attempts at rescue go horribly wrong, and the king marks them for death. Now they must flee the kingdom with a hefty reward on their heads. Meanwhile, the king’s soldiers march to war, placing Bree’s hometown in their path of destruction. Jonas must go ...

In the days of yore, he flew the skies and scorched angry mobs - now he hides from swamp tour boats and rises only with the greatest reluctance from his La-Z-Boy recliner. Laying low in the bayou, this once-magnificent fire breather has been reduced to lighting Marlboros with nose sparks, swilling Absolut in a Flashdance T-shirt, and binging Netflix in a fishing shack. For centuries, he struck fear in hearts far and wide as Wyvern, Lord Highfire of the Highfire Eyrie - now he goes by Vern.

After their masters are vaporized in a goblin battle gone bad, Fart, Pan, and Moxie - three lowly apprentices - decide to impersonate their mentors and pick up the mantle as heroes of the realm. But they need more than a fancy robe, magic staff, and book of magical beasts to be real heroes. They need a quest! So when The Great and Powerful Kevin puts out a call for help, seeking the coveted Golden Llama and its magical golden fart, young Fart and his friends jump at the chance and embark on a journey they were destined for.

Olivia Harris is recovering from a nightmare. Most days she’s certain she will never be mentally healthy enough to rejoin the human race. Suffering from PTSD and experiencing severe anxiety attacks, she returns to her native Alaska to live in semi-seclusion in the little cabin she inherited from her father. Tucker Sterling struggles with a restless, unsettled bear that he is unable to tame. Nothing soothes his bear, not the six years he spent in the army’s Delta Force unit, not the multitude of nameless, faceless, women who share his bed, nothing—until Liv Harris returns to Port Ursa....

Anything that lives devours or is devoured itself. The fractured factions seek strength in the face of rising global instability while the gluttonous Chaos Dungeon begins its conquest of the Elemental Battlefield. With a veritable buffet of advancement for the taking, Ace strives to hit Platinum before a mysterious threat reaches his Core. Witness the struggles of those left standing after the jaws of death snap shut in Chaos Devouring.

When Nory’s magic first appeared, her father wanted her to go to fancy, selective Sage Academy, where he is the headmaster. But Nory’s magic went upside down at the worst possible moment, and she was sent to Dunwiddle Middle School instead! The good news? Nory loves Dunwiddle, and her best friends have upside down magic, too! The bad news? When a flood wrecks Dunwiddle, Nory and her UDM friends are forced to relocate...to Sage Academy!

It was supposed to be another boring day at the insurance office for Rico Kline, but powerful forces had other plans for him. Finding himself repeatedly summoned to other worlds as a disposable minion, Rico must face deadly foes, disarm insidious traps, become a test subject, and run the occasional errand for his various summoners. At least when each summoning is over, he’s rewarded and sent back home. But being back home has its own set of problems, and he'll need to grow stronger to face it all.

Dirk was America’s golden boy. Olympic golds, Wheaties box—the works. That was ten years ago. Turns out going to prison is terrible for sponsorships. Now, he’s alone, a felony on his record, and bitter at the world. Enter the Tower of Conflict. Just what a man needs to get out of a rut—the end of the world and a Tower to Climb. Aided by his talking goose animal companion, magical cape, and the Goddess of Fate herself, Dirk is primed to take this Tower by storm.

This is the legend of Saint Frank, and the great deeds he what did to earn that Sainthood, not born a Saint, in the beginning he was just, Frank, but not long after some stuff that took long, he became Sir. Frank. Sir. Frank may or may not have slayed a Dragon, if he did then this is the Tale of how Sir. Frank became Saint Frank, and if he did not then this is the story of nearly a Saint Frank and a triumphant Dragon.

Secrets, Magic, and Sizzling Romance in Whispering Pines Celeste Rowan returns to the only place she's ever felt at home: Whispering Pines, a magical town filled with paranormal beings. But a car accident at the edge of town leaves her with no memories of her life and in the arms of a mysterious, muscular wolf shifter who sets her heart ablaze. Kade Blackwood has been searching for his mate since she was taken away years ago, but she's back. While helping her remember her past, he's determined to keep their connection a secret to not pressure her. Neither can ignore the undeniable chemistry...

Milo lives in a steel cave within a man-made mountain of steel and concrete. He spends his days repairing the machinery that keeps the habitat livable and tinkering with the prosthetics that help his twisted body move about through the small tunnels and air shafts that are his world. He's as much a piece of discarded machinery as the equipment he keeps running. An escaped lab experiment living in a hole. Given a chance at being someone different, will he become a hero and live in the sunlight?