White hair is defying all logic and decency, and today on What’s News With You with stand-up comedians Josh Johnson, Ashley Gavin, guest anchor Emily Wilson, and YOU — we are covering it! The news team updates us on treadmills murdering people, desperately needing a haircut, and making choices despite everyone telling you not to. YOU, our listeners, update us moon-walking strangers seeking violence and the disturbing new link between humans and dolphins: horniness.

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Ohio is getting EVEN WORSE to live in, and today on What’s News With You with stand-up comedians Josh Johnson, Ashley Gavin, guest anchor Ali Kolbert, and YOU — we are covering it! The news team updates us on terrorizing dog parks, getting the splits, finding the Lord, and your smoke-show sister stopping a mass shooting with her hotness. YOU, our listeners, update us on Houston police having their confiscated drugs eaten by rats and cars CONTINUING to crash into everything in Ohio.

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Robotics are developing at a terrifying pace, and today on What’s News With You with stand-up comedians Josh Johnson, Ashley Gavin, and YOU — we are covering it! The news team updates us on Chimp Crazy, herbs flavored by gang-violence, and getting too much sauce. YOU, our listeners, update us on Scooby Doo characters getting arrested IRL and the tale of the Buffalo Pothole Bandit. Josh investigates why Ash has lost her mind over Chinese robots. Ashley rants about marshmallow rain in Michigan.

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