In this episode of the Untidy Faith Podcast, host Kate Boyd welcomes back guest Sharifa Stevens to discuss her new book about prayer and poems. Their conversation explores how many Christians struggle with barriers to authentic prayer, often feeling they must approach God in a "perfect" way. Sharifa shares her journey toward understanding that there's no wrong way to bring our full selves to God, and how harmful theology has created unnecessary barriers between believers and authentic spiritual connection.

Sharifa Stevens is a writer, poet, speaker, and singer. She is the daughter of Jamaican immigrants, born and raised in New York, and currently resides with her family in Dallas, Texas. She graduated from Columbia University in New York with a bachelor’s degree in African American Studies before earning a master’s in theology from Dallas Theological Seminary. Sharifa aspires to use writing as a vehicle that moves readers to intersect with the sacred and the honest. She co- authored Only Light Can Do That and contributed to the books Vindicating the Vixens, Rally, and Lecrae’s upcoming Set Me Free. Sharifa is married to a Renaissance man and is a mother to two lively boys.

Topics Covered:

* Barriers to prayer that many experience, including the feeling that we can't approach God with certain struggles or that we need to be in an "almost heavenly state of being" to pray

* How performance-based faith and "worm theology" (focusing on our unworthiness) creates voids in our relationship with God and prevents authentic connection

* The impact of gender on spiritual experiences, particularly how women are often infantilized in church contexts and discouraged from spiritual autonomy

* How our bodies often signal when we're holding back parts of ourselves due to fear, and why vulnerability can be difficult after negative experiences

* The value of written prayers and spiritual resources that give us language when we can't find our own words to express our experiences to God

Timestamps:

02:06 Understanding Prayer and Barriers

06:14 Personal Experiences with Prayer

08:53 The Impact of Theology on Self-Perception

21:34 The Role of Women in Faith and Society

27:12 Jesus and His Treatment of Women

28:34 Modern Conversations on Women's Roles

30:03 The Impact of Bad Theology

35:18 Navigating Faith and Mental Health

38:46 The Importance of Community and Self-Trust

44:04 Embracing Emotions and Coping Mechanisms

46:35 The Role of Compassion in Faith