Anna

Moving, real, raw, and, not inspiring, but gives a bright spot in what is usually bleak darkness

Revisado: 09-03-24

For people who were traumatized as children, reading about our Trauma can feel overwhelming and very bleak. We spend so much time second guessing ourselves. Did this really happen? Was it all a dream? Am I just trying to get attention? What is wrong with me? Why am I like this? And then you start reading about it and it feels like no one really knows what the answer is but they can pathologize the crap out of you and give you all sorts of explanations about why I'm always so anxious and paranoid and withdrawn. And the thing is I know why I'm like this, too. I can write you books and books about it. What I want is to find a way to deal with this so I can learn to be close to someone without dissolving into a literal panic attack. And it feels like this is the first time I've read about trauma that didn't end with either "and that is the literal horror story of my life" or "and we have all these treatment options but like none of them have a particularly high success rate". Sometimes it feels like everyone feels really bad for you but is just like so stumped by you that they just shake their heads like maybe she wants to be this way. So, I like that at the end, she talked about how the first really secure attachments she formed were her friends and they taught her that she can love and be loved without driving everyone away because she's done it before. I feel that way about my friends sometimes. I think I learned more about love from them than any therapist, although the therapist is the one who taught me how to ground myself and have better conversations. So, it was refreshing to hear that she did eventually learn skills to do better while also not blaming herself and forgiving herself for feeling very justifiable and normal anger and disappointment and resentment and that she learned to live with her trauma instead of being ruled by it.

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The best description of growing from child to mother I've ever read

Revisado: 05-23-24

I think a lot of women can relate to the way Woolf talks about gender in this book, the passage of time, the feeling of growing as time passes. When it's happening, it often feels like it will go on forever and then when you look back you realize how many of yourself you have been and how little time has passed and also how much. She accurately captures this feeling so well and I cannot recommend this book enough. There are so many things to say about this book that I can't fit them all in a review. If you're a woman, read it. If you're sapphic woman, you should definitely read it. If you're a young woman or an older woman, you should read it. I imagine if you are a trans or nonbinary AFAB person, it will feel particularly on the nose. But I think she talks about gender and sexuality in a way that nearly all women can relate to.

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Love this story and love Rosamond Pike

Revisado: 12-22-21

Jane Austen wrote an amazing story. Rosamund Pike is amazing. What else can I say?

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Excellent story and I love Rosamund Pike

Revisado: 12-16-21

Title says it all. Rosamund is an excellent actress and a wonderful reader. She adds life to every character and makes the story come alive. I hope they pay her to do at least some of the other books as well.

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Good, needs historical context

Revisado: 11-10-20

This is a remarkably well written book with depth and commentary which will probably take several successive readings for me to parse out. It feels very modern while also painting a very vivid picture of 19th century Paris. You may want to brush up on your French history before tackling this book. It takes place during the years leading up to the February Revolution in 1848.

Flaubert said he wanted to write a moral history of the men of his generation. As he said, "It's a book about love, about passion; but passion such as can exist nowadays--that is to say, inactive." I couldn't say it better myself.

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Not as good as Debt

Revisado: 12-23-19

Didn't finish. Mainly it's because I couldn't help thinking about how the occupy movement ultimately had very little effect on much of anything. However, if you need some tips on how to organize your social/political movement, it might be helpful.

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Eye opening

Revisado: 05-24-19

It's pretty dense with a lot of math an science, but it's something that appeals to me as a reader and helps me connect with the ideas. But, the advice is invaluable. It helped me see my behavior and my partner's behavior in a new light and gave me hope that it's something that can be fixed.

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