Ernie T

Thanks Judi

Revisado: 05-03-21

I generally hate to lie. It makes me feel bad, I want to be comfortable with the truth (good or bad), and lying often seems to come out as a lie later. I recently came across another article by Judi, unrelated to lies, which immediately made me like her. She shared a personal story of how her routine went against society norms and how she examined this and came to peace with it. Most of us seem to be programmed robots, and I think we all need to examine our beliefs, feelings, and reactions more. This is what the author does, and I love it. When I saw she had a book examining lying, I was immediately interested. I’m currently going through my own issues with this. I grew up in a family that did not share the personal tough stuff, and as a quiet guarded person, I continue that tradition. This is omission. I want to become open and transparent. I had a married friend of mine (one of my few friends) recently tell me, “you are my only friend here now”. I was shocked that he would share this with me. I want to learn from him. My girlfriend of 20 years is brutally honest to me. (She also though seems comfortable to lie in other areas of life). She will regularly point out my biggest flaws and remind me of my deepest insecurities. I thought, doesn’t this person have any compassion or sense of what she is doing? I now think the problem lies more in me. I still love her deeply (not much in a romantic way), but I have been thinking about moving on. I’ve been having an emotional affair with another woman, whom I’ve never met in person, for about six months now. I have a lot to figure out, and I will need to have some difficult honest talks soon, including with family and friends. From a very early age, I pretty much never believed in black or white. What I love about this author and this book is the thorough personal examination of this topic. She comes at the subject from all sides of life, always with personal stories to share. Scientific studies and views from other authors are also included. The book was quite long, and while Judi might have elaborated in places more than I needed, the book was interesting and informative throughout. People lie all the time for a wide variety of reasons, and I think it generally has a real negative outcome for our society and for us personally. I think we all need to be more aware about our actions and our reasons for doing things and feeling things. This is just another great book to help with that journey of personal discovery.

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