Olivia Hill

When Pamela Druckerman turns 40, waiters start calling her "Madame", and she detects a disturbing new message in mens' gazes: I would sleep with her, but only if doing so required no effort whatsoever. Yet 40 isn't even technically middle-aged anymore. And after a lifetime of being clueless, Druckerman can finally grasp the subtext of conversations, maintain (somewhat) healthy relationships and spot narcissists before they ruin her life. What are the modern 40s, and what do we know once we reach them? What makes someone a "grown-up" anyway?

It’s time to change the conversation—about work, life, and “balance.” Work and life are inextricably, intimately intertwined. We need to celebrate what we do give our children—even and especially in moments of imbalance—rather than apologizing for what we don’t. In this way, we can model for our children how we use our talents to help others and raise awareness about the issues closest to our hearts.