A.N. Enigma

A reclusive botanist learns her slave is loveable.

Revisado: 02-21-23

Roslyn Sinclair is rapidly moving up the list of my favorite authors. The Lily and the Crown is exceptional and I regret not reading it sooner. The story is told from the perspective of Ariana Geiker, a reclusive botanist who spends most of her time tending and talking to plants rather than engaging with others. She’s not agoraphobic but experiences debilitating social anxiety and low self-esteem. And that’s unfortunate because she is a fount of information and passion. When her father assigns her ownership of a pirate slave she refuses the “gift” because she wants to be left to her own devices. But, the more time she spends with her new assistant the more she’s drawn to her company.

So, what makes this book great? I love Ariana, and I usually find naivete annoying because it’s a common trait of the damsel in distress. However, Ari is no damsel and fights back at every opportunity. People wrongly assume that because she rarely leaves her quarters she is unintelligent or incapable. This isn’t accurate, but no one makes an effort to know her until the slave, known as “Assistant,” is assigned to her. Assistant is equally compelling, but for different reasons. While Ari’s many layers are laid bare as the book progresses, Assistant is reticent to divulge information about her past. She’s a riddle wrapped in a mystery, and that brings me to something else this book does well…

Anyone who loves reading will know exactly who Assistant is early-on. It’s not an especially well-disguised secret because hints are dropped routinely. Some might argue that this ruins the mystery but I think it only adds to it. Why is she doing what she’s doing? Did she plan on falling for Ari? What is the end goal? So, knowing who Assistant is creates tension and a lot of questions. There’s nothing I love more than not being able to put a book down because I need to know what is happening. So, bravo, Sinclair. I lost hours of sleep. You’re responsible for the black circles under my eyes!

I’m sincerely questioning whether or not I need to leave constructive criticism, but I do this for every book I read. Learning is growing, right? Sigh. So, I think this story could be better if we knew more about Assistant as a person – not her past necessarily, but what she enjoys. I wanted the two characters to bond over a shared passion because they always seem diametrically opposed. Opposites attract is a compelling dynamic. But even people who are different bond over things like chocolate ice cream. There needs to be a great equalizer especially because one of them is a slave,

Regardless, this book is 5-stars. You’re only hurting yourself by not reading it. It’s not heavy sci-fi. It’s sexy as hell. And it’s binge-worthy. Please Sinclair, retcon the epilogue and give us more of this relationship. I’m not too proud to beg.

Also, if you have Audible credits, buy the audiobook. Angela Dawe is sensational.

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Unfortunately, Not as Good as Delilah Green

Revisado: 12-23-22

The writing is still strong, but almost everything I praised about the first book has become an issue with the second.

Firstly, as a lesbian, I would deeply love if all the women in my life were, in some way, questioning their sexual identity. But, the fact that almost every character in this universe has become LGBTQIA+ feels disingenuous. I think everyone deserves representation, however, not everyone needs representation in the same book or small town community. It's just not how the world works. I have plenty of straight friends that I love dearly. I didn't choose them because of who they choose to love.

Secondly, I don't particularly love that Astrid wilts after learning she's lived large parts of her life for her mom - an epiphany that happens for a second time. I think this story would have enough internal conflict if Astrid was trying to understand her sexuality and how her mother will handle that without the added frustration of doing her job poorly. Ice queens are usually good at their jobs because they exclude aspects of romance. They don't usually choose to do things they're bad at because they relish control. I would know, it's a mirror I look into regularly. So, it felt, to me, like Astrid's identity was being ripped out of her rather than transforming through new insights. Change is good. Burning it all down is not.

Which brings me to Jordan, who I believe is a sweet soul, but had no right to spring the new plans for the remodel on Astrid during filming. It was a situation of "two wrongs don't make a right." I genuinely wish Jordan had stuck to the high ground, with minor forays into immaturity so that Astrid could see she was being ridiculous to someone so kind. Instead, I found myself feeling increasingly awful for Astrid because it seems no one will just give her space to breathe - even while she's trying to take deep, cleansing breaths to ease her anxiety. Stillness and silence are two virtues I wish more people possessed. I don't feel like Jordan creates this type of safe space. She is chaos. She is the woman who will light bookcases on fire without a thought.

And so, as much as I still loved parts of this book, I don't think it's as good as the first. The dynamic between Jordan and Astrid doesn't feel believable. And while I know not everyone on the planet is like me, I still can't see how this relationship would work. My partner is everything I am not because if there were two people living in this house who allowed their tempers and egos to get the best of them, we'd be living in a pile of rubble and soot. I do not deserve her, and I make sure she knows that. And she loves to laugh and tell me that she knows I don't deserve her. That's part of the charm.

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Everything and the Kitchen Sink

Revisado: 12-20-22

This is an incredible accomplishment for a debut novel. The pacing is excellent. The plot never strays from its mission, which is to discuss the complex nature of various types of relationships. And though it’s told through the alternating perspectives of two protagonists, everyone at the periphery feels valuable. They’re not just set dressing to make you feel like the two protagonists have other people in their lives.

Then there’s the fact that the author has skillfully dissected interpersonal conflicts. Any time a romance has to consider parenthood I cringe inwardly. The same is also true of misogyny. Both of these circumstances can cause an author to swerve into oncoming traffic on the way to their point, and it often comes off as heavy-handed and preachy. That’s not the case here. Every way these characters interact feels real. It straddles a line between maturity and immaturity that is, so often, at the center of every relationship. Because as much as most of us want to act like adults, we’re not always capable of doing so.

Thankfully, the story is not filled with cliche or comically bizarre scenarios. Though it does include some dry wit and I did laugh aloud a time or two. I would assume I laughed where the author intended. I’ve read so many books in the last two months that have not even approached the level of realism here. And I can’t decide if this is because the author is truly gifted with talent - she must be - or if my growing up was so similar to Delilah’s that I connected more to this story than others. Perhaps both are true.

All I know is that this is an incredible romance novel, and I will be reading the second in the series soon.

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Mixed Feelings

Revisado: 11-29-22

On the plus side, it's clear the author has spent a great deal of time with the characters. They are flawed and beautiful and frustrating and wonderful. That's difficult to achieve without passion. This must have been exhausting to write because it's filled with emotion from beginning to end.

Furthermore, this story is not reliant on tropes or cliche and occasionally meanders into prose. Some of the insights the author makes are exquisite, while others fall flat or feel forced. This is bound to happen when you write a story of this length. But, on the whole, I found myself appreciating the little flourishes.

Having said this, I suspect the author had difficulty with transitioning characters from Point A to Point B. For example, at one point in the story, mermaids are introduced but serve no greater purpose than a pit stop on the journey. They don't provide greater context into this world or the central characters. So, their net effect is zero.

And that's the biggest problem with this book - it has almost zero plot. It's about two characters wandering through a vast land the reader knows almost nothing about while those characters get to know each other better. There are, of course, insights along the way. But the world itself is shrouded in a mystery that is wholly incomprehensible. There seem to be modern conveniences in some locations while others appear stuck in medieval fantasy. It is unfortunate because there's so much potential for this world to be refreshingly original. But, it lacks pieces that would complete the puzzle.

I'm loathe to rate this novel lower than 4 stars even though it's flawed. But I also don't believe that perfect fiction exists. It's a sweet story. It's like a love letter between two people who are reminiscing about their first glance. And because I could, quite literally, reminisce about falling in love for hours, I am happy to listen/read about two people falling in love.

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Interesting Direction

Revisado: 11-23-22

It's interesting that many of my complaints about the previous book in this series, The Brutal Truth, are addressed in this book. Sandy Cooper is more confident in her own skin than Maddie and it feels like she can juggle a relationship with a powerful businesswoman. And that's not because Cooper is a "soft-butch," it's because she knows what she wants from her own life. This is also true of the characters in Winters' book Breaking Character. So, I wholly approve of the Felicity and Sandy pairing.

Unfortunately, I find Felicity insufferable and exhausting, even as I hope that she finds success on her emotional journey. I'm not so critical that I am incapable of seeing how others might find Felicity attractive. So I pushed past my own biases to see if I would enjoy other parts of this book. I do appreciate that Felicity is cold and abrasive and abysmal with social cues. Statistics suggest that 40% of autistics are homosexual. It's lovely to see some representation even if it's not something specifically addressed by this book. I am autistic and have my own "Cooper" to love and I need her to remind me to approach certain topics with care. It takes all kinds.

So, why didn't I like Felicity? It's her intense energy. She is the embodiment of a spitfire. I may be calculating and focused, but I'm not likely to burn the world down with my energy. Am I passionate? Yes. Exuberant? No. Felicity's a bit of a "mean girl" without socialite friends. I did like to see her unravel towards the end in a way that felt redeeming. Still, I must request that Dawe only read in Felicity's voice sparingly in the future. More Elaina. Less Felicity. /insert impish smirk/ I am that selfish.

In my fourth book into my Winters' journey, I am beginning to question the use of third-person narrative. Throughout Breaking Character the author switches between characters to tell the story. In this book, most of the insight comes from Felicity. And Felicity is the one that grows from the beginning of the novel to the end. I question the perspective choice because I feel like the tension of the book might be better if it's not as obvious what the other characters are thinking and feeling. I assume the author has made this decision for a particular reason, and I'm sad to not know what it is because it might help me be less critical. Still, I can't see what third-person is achieving that first-person would not.

Last but certainly not least, I must crucify this sentence, "Her arms rested along the armrest." Sigh. I'm sure the author would look at this sentence and know this needs editing but it is hard to see these glaringly obvious issues when one has read their own material ten or twenty times. "Arm" and "rest" twice in the same sentence? I'm wincing even as I know it's something I am occasionally guilty of doing. And, I must reiterate that the use of "rueful" and "half-lidded" needs to be scaled back. I nearly choked on a piece of chocolate only a few minutes into the book when Dawe spoke one of these words. I mean, I knew they were likely to resurface after I criticized their overuse in The Brutal Truth, but I hadn't suspected it would be so soon.

And even after all this criticism, I would still recommend this book. Is it perfect? No. Was it for me? Not really. But, I can see how others will enjoy it and I fully accept that I am a demanding woman who has insane expectations from fiction.

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Spicy and Sweet with Some Minor Issues

Revisado: 11-21-22

Okay Winters, third book is the charm, and I finally have a large portion of your written vocabulary down. So, I politely request that you find alternatives for the words, "rueful" and "half-lidded." There was a third word but it's 6:30 AM and my brain is operating but not especially awake since I have yet to sleep. I suspect the third word will become apparent by the time I finish the next book. "Rueful" is evocative, but adjectives abound. That's a critique and not an admonishment.

So, Breaking Character is still my favorite Winters book. I'm starting to think I have a weakness for actresses - which is not something I would have ever expected to say about myself. This book is also good, but I have more issues with it than my previous two reads. That said, I read this to see the setup for The Awkward Truth not because I believed it would be the most polished stone. It would make sense that Winters has become a better writer over time.

My biggest issue with this book is that the power dynamic between the two characters is too substantial. I'm not suggesting that relationships of this nature are impossible. I know from experience that they're all too real. But, I also know from experience that this dynamic can lead to some unhealthy side effects. It takes a very strong person, someone confident and intelligent, to persevere with an Elaina. I've had at least three lovers who were so intimidated by my "commanding presence" and "intelligence" that they feared I would be bored in their company. And just so I'm clear, I eye-rolled this sentence as I wrote it out. It's absurd. I was just happy to have someone to take my mind off of the things that trouble me. I appreciate that Maddie is light-hearted, but I'm not convinced she sees her own worth. She reminds me of someone I knew who fixated on their own shortcomings to the point of paralysis. And while Maddie's career takes off, I don't feel as though she has achieved much in the way of character growth. She is smitten before Chapter 10, gets a big break, and is smitten in the end. In contrast, Elaina had to grow and keep growing as the story went on.

Additionally, the ending is a bit choppy for my own tastes. The characters separate for reasons that feel contrived. And I thought, more than once, that Elaina was obtuse. For someone so capable of clear and concise management she struggles to be clear with Maddie at every turn. But then, she also turns into a lesbian sex God at the end of book without any prior experience with women. This could have been explained away so easily too, but no mention of research is made.

So, there's some bad logic at work here, but that doesn't make this a bad book. It's still good. And I thought the premise of "brutal honesty" was sound since I employ it in my every day life. It doesn't win me the love and adoration of many. But, I also value the intimacy of real connection. So, I spend less time on people that don't bring a smile to my face and more time on people that do. It's interesting to see my characteristics examined by someone else, even if the dossier is not especially flattering.

Dawe is, again, sublime. I'm not surprised. I'd give her an Audie but it turns out I have zero authority on audiobooks - the horror.

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Mostly Fun, Slightly Dull

Revisado: 11-20-22

I read Winters' Breaking Character before starting Hotel Queens, and I prefer the latter. This book is also good but, unfortunately, the story isn't as tight. Part of the issue is that setting up this tale requires a sizeable chunk of words to explain the characters occupations. And while the character dynamic is similarly electric to Breaking Character, it's difficult to get really excited about the hotel industry. As someone on the spectrum who loves a good spreadsheet, even I can only get so excited about maths and employee retention.

Thus, if you need a story to start quickly and keep a brisk pace, you may have difficulty enjoying Hotel Queens. If, however, you are someone who likes a slow-burn examination of characters, you will probably find this enjoyable in spite of the central plot revolving around hotels. I knew what I was getting myself into before I spent the credit. Hell, "hotel" is in the title. So, let's just say Breaking Character was so good I was eager to see how hotels could be made sexy.

Winters writing is still quite good - far above many of her peers. And Dawe's performance as a narrator should be criminal because it feels sinful to listen to. It's evident she prereads material because she uses tempo and tone to weave an audio tapestry. I appreciate the dedication because few narrators put in the time to hone delivery. This duo is the best I have come across on Audible. I'm pretty sure they could make an epitaph sound like it was a smoldering gaze.

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Genuinely Great Writing

Revisado: 11-18-22

I'll admit my skepticism about Winters talents as a writer. That said, it's hard to ignore so many gushing reviews when in want of quality lesbian fiction. My bar for lesbian romance is barely above ground level because much of it is... lackluster. I won't elaborate or we'll be here all day. Suffice to say, I'm a long-time Sarah Waters fan.

So, let's focus on what is great about this story. Winters skillfully calls attention to her characters behaviors without bogging them down in the mundane. She draws interesting insights from conversations and glances in a way that oozes off the page. And while that is cliché, it's no less true. These characters feel intimately known. But where intimation is usually thinly veiled in pages of exposition and inner monologue, this book is an excellent example of "show, don't tell." Everything these characters do feels authentic. I almost finished this book in one go - a rare feat for me considering I can't multitask. Be thankful I wasn't operating heavy machinery.

I'm a book snob without any writing accolades and hard to please where romance is concerned. So, if there's anyone prepared to find flaws in fiction it's me. I will state, for the record, there are some minor issues I had with the story itself, but not its writing. However, my issues are niggles and not necessarily wrong choices. Grace is an obvious foil. I do wish she'd been moderately more likeable because she's supposed to be Elizabeth's friend. And Elizabeth, someone so confident and proud, doesn't seem like the type of person who would entertain Grace for five minutes when she won't abide a novice costar. And I wanted Elizabeth to prove to me why Grace deserved her eye. Instead, right from the go, Grace is annoyingly bewildering. I think the climax of this book would have been better had Grace possessed some redeeming qualities.

However, this is easily one of the best lesbian romances I've ever ever read. I laughed aloud more more than once and winced where appropriate. Suffice to say, Winters has won over this ice queen. I'm a believer. And Angela Dawe's performance is deliciously provocative. She nails almost every accent perfectly. I especially enjoyed her take on a French man. That has to be one of the most masculine voices I've ever heard a woman on Audible produce. Bravo.

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Good and Bad

Revisado: 11-12-22

I hesitate to review the creations of others because I know how intimate my relationship is with my own writing. However, I feel compelled to leave a review because I do like several of Tereze's novels and hope to see more in the future.

Having said this, as a 41-year-old woman who has been the younger woman in every relationship, I feel that some of the crises the characters encounter throughout this story are immature. Additionally, the reveal at the end was frustrating because I felt I hadn't been trusted with the character's innermost thoughts. Ergo, I couldn't appreciate the growth that was happening. It made me feel like Hailey would always have one foot out the door while wearing a cheeky smile rather than finally achieving inner peace.

And that's the thing, tons of communication occurs between Tereze's characters that completely skirts around insecurities. Insecurities are what make people worth knowing. So, if everyone is talking but not revealing anything, how can the reader connect with the characters, let alone the relationship that is being built? Furthermore, I understand that this relationship started as a "fling" but both characters know that it isn't just a fling before they ever consider honesty with one another. Consequently, there's a lot of back and forth in this book. Will they? Won't they? Will they again? And it's over what would be very trivial revelations to most people - certainly not issues that would make someone backpedal out of love. You've had trouble maintaining past relationships? Let's build that foundation together. You think you're unlovable? Let me show you that you are loveable. Most people know that love presents challenges, but they're things to work through and not around. Both of these characters circle each other rather than gravitating toward each other. Love is gravity.

I can promise that if a beautiful older woman hopped on a plane to Ibiza to see me, I wouldn't let her go. I certainly wouldn't be thinking I wasn't good enough to love. I'd probably tie her to the mattress and make her swear to me she'd love me forever. And while I understand that's an intense way to handle things, why waste time skirting around it? If you love someone you love them. It doesn't matter how many walls people build. Love gets around them. It's like a weed that grows in between cracks of cement. That's how love works and why it's so bloody painful when things come crashing down. Dante knew unrequited love so well it became his hell. Because even if you don't say a word to the person you're pining for, that love lingers on and on without relief. So, if you're going to feel that love anyway, why wouldn't you just say so? Because it'll hurt? It'll hurt if you don't.

But I digress. So, I'll just say that I hope that in future novels Tereze will insert some predicaments that aren't just two characters terrified to be honest with each other. Sure, some of that song and dance is necessary. But, at the climax of a book I want there to be a "will they" or "won't they" that isn't simply because both people are so insecure about how the other feels. I'm confident that if this happens Tereze's novels are going to improve tremendously. There's great passion, plenty of build-up, and snarky banter for days - it's just missing one fundamental piece - two characters so desperate for one another that they take the armor off and set it down.

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Better Than Dresden Could Ever Hope To Be

Revisado: 05-22-22

It boggles my mind how many reviews lament the narration of this story when I found it quite enjoyable. And I almost always believe it is a disservice to the material for an author to read their work. Arnold's narration is exactly what his character is - dark and brooding. This is noir. It's clear the intent was to give some feeling of coldness and apathy. His voice is what I expect from this genre. Furthermore, the voices he uses for the various characters are a stark contrast, easy to distinguish, and equally enjoyable. He is, after all, a paid actor for his day job - a fact I'm guessing most didn't read in the blurb given their suggestion that Arnold stick to writing.

However, I'll confess that I was sold on the premise of this book rather than the author. See, I love urban fantasy even though I feel the genre suffers from some very ham-fisted writing and problematic relationships. This is especially true with Dresden and plots which never fully coalesce and interpersonal relationships that ultimately feel hollow. Susan, who? Elaine, who? So, when I stumbled across this title I was leary for more than reasons of narration. Could this book finally be the urban fantasy I'd been looking for? I doubted it, but I now know the answer to this question is an empathic, "yes."

This book is nothing like Dresden aside from the "urban fantasy" setting. For starters, there is a romanticism to Arnold's writing that Butcher has never managed to capture. And romanticism is paramount in noir. Without the romanticism, there is little to cheer for and, as Fetch so astutely points out, little to hope for. There are little touches of romanticism sprinkled throughout. Most notably, Fetch's relationship with a startup restauranteur is a clever way of demonstrating that he hasn't given up on living in this world even while he's numbing himself with painkillers and saying that he has. Each of the characters brim with personality and purpose. Sunder City is a melting pot and I could have kept listening just to hear more about its inhabitants.

Fortunately, though, it's Fetch's story we've been gifted. It's a hell of a ride. Yes, there is a lot of exposition, as tends to be true of this genre. So if you're looking for something that clips along at light-speed, search elsewhere. Noir is meant to be a slow unraveling. And "unravel" Fetch does. The author uses whole chapters to occasionally spin-off bits of back story. I'm not usually fond of this as a story-telling mechanic, but I think the author succeeds in pulling this off where others have not. It's not that, as a reader, I was unaware of the journey we'd be going on as there is plenty of foreshadowing throughout. But, the journey itself allows bits of Fetch's personality to slip into place. As these pieces coalesced, I found myself caring immensely about Fetch and his crumbling mansion. And that's the thing, his crumbling mansion is just one theme among dozens that have been so carefully woven into the fabric of this story that I found myself reflecting on how expertly it had been done. It's a musing reflection on life, and what is worth living for and dying for, and what it means to be a cog in the machine of a world that will carry on with or without you.

So, as someone who loves but has often been jaded by urban fantasy, this book is in every way a revelation. It is full of complicated relationships, reflections on racism and class stratification, and reveals that are satisfyingly impactful. This book feels like a real living world. Bravo.

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