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Meet the superhero Spleen Squeezer, discover the true story of Eden, and travel to the safest city in the world in this third collection of unclassifiable ultra-short pieces by K.M. Halpern. But wait, there's more! For the same price, you get twice the wisdom, twice the wit, twice the heartpounding absurdity. Learn the danger of having ears, the importance of being unlikable, and how to achieve quality as an executioner. But it's a limited time offer. Delay and it could be too late. Since that's true of all things, it must be true of this.

More absurd, horrifying, and downright inexplicable shorts from the author of The Man Who Stands in Line. Included are such soon-to-be classics as Buzz-Saw Bob, the sport of pendulum watching, yet another secret to ultimate success, the art of gasping, a neighbor who is definitely not Mr. Rogers, and Buddha's morning commute. I legally can't promise that this book will transform you into the demiurge you were meant to be. All I can say is that no medical studies have proven otherwise, and the FDA moves very slowly.

Killer flies, amorous dinosaurs, angry buildings, and one very large fish - all in a single volume. The Man Who Stands in Line takes a surreal and humorous view of the usual questions of self, purpose, and society. This quirky collection of flash fiction, vignettes, and poetry is variously absurd, dark, and comic. A monstrous blister, the secret to immortality, and a lost piece of brain are just a few other oddities one will encounter in this one-of-a-kind book.