Robin Graber

An exaggerated look at a teenage boy's mind

Revisado: 09-26-19

I'm not sure what I thought this was going to be, but it wasn't that. It's a short novel about Cole and Cole's sex life. Yep. That's the premise. Maybe this was exactly like Handler's teen experience, but I would say it's a bit of an exaggeration of the typical teen boy thought process. Honestly, if I hadn't known it was Handler writing, I would've assumed it was a woman writing what she thought was the typical teen boy thought process.

Basically, Cole is so obsessed with sex it's all he thinks about. He routinely dates girls, sleeps with them, breaks up (or gets broken up with), and then repeats. He gets a reputation of being a player, but doesn't really care. There's a little piece of experimentation on his part as well, that I thought was pretty interesting. He has one male friend, Alec, who he always recounts his sexual activities with. But soon that delves into mutual masturbation, and then sex.

What I love about this is how cavalier he is about the whole thing. It's very clear to Cole that he's doing this just to get laid, but Alec is doing this because he thinks he's gay or bi. So Cole just keeps hooking up with him until Grisaille comes along.

Now this was where I definitely rolled my eyes. It's just so typical to do the "out-of-town" new girl who's ~worldly~ so obviously Cole immediately falls for her. I did think it was interesting how he was sort of just coasting before, but then he becomes OBSESSED with Grisaille. Unfortunately, he immediately dumps Alec in order to spend all his time with Grisaille. Grisaille however, ends up using him and manipulating him into hooking up with another girl, so that she can then hook up with another guy.

And this serves as how Cole finally has some introspection on how he's hurt others by doing almost the same thing. I did enjoy getting to see him start to learn from his behaviors and issues. I also really enjoyed Cole's voice throughout it. While still a bit extreme, his voice sounded authentic to the character, and was fascinating to read. I'll also say the audiobook version was great, and I thoroughly recommend it.

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Incredibly informative and a must read

Revisado: 09-22-19

I have a few female friends with chronic illness that have struggled through the medical system, so I already knew that we definitely have some issues when it comes to the medical system. But holy hell it goes even deeper than I thought. This book is filled with stats and stories that show how deeply flawed our medical system is when it comes to women’s health.

The one that got me the most was her chapter on heart attacks and chest pains. I could not believe how many women get turned away IN THE MIDDLE OF A HEART ATTACK because they don’t exhibit male symptoms. Like I can’t even imagine what it would feel like to go to a doctor, get turned away, and then get told later “oh yeah, you had a heart attack earlier.” Like what the hell?!

It makes me angry how doctors and researchers are letting their egos get in the way of helping women. The fact that doctors would rather chalk it up to “hysteria” or “somatoform disorders” than actually looking into finding the cause of their pain or issue is astounding. It was interesting to hear Dusenbery talk about how few doctors will admit or even know that they’re wrong. She brings up an example where less than 1% of the doctors in this conference say they’ve ever misdiagnosed someone. It’s typically because they never find out that the person they diagnosed with a somatoform disorder rather than the real disorder never comes back. Which frankly, if it was me, I’d be busting into that doctor’s office with my diagnosed and yelling about how much he sucks lol.

It was also surprising to me how many female nurses are referenced as shaming other women. Like I guess I shouldn’t be surprised but like, support other women y’all!?! There’s one example where when a doctor gives a diagnose, the patient asks if it could be something else. The doctor says no and leaves basically. But then the female nurse is like “You shouldn’t question him. He doesn’t like that.” I would’ve been like “I don’t a f*ck what he likes.” But that’s the privilege of being a male I guess. It would never happen to me like that.

The piece on how the internet has changed the game for women was also eye opening. I’m always a fan of the internet (and yes, I know there’s some parts that aren’t great) but the fact that women could do some research online and find others like them, and finally feel like they aren’t alone is so touching. And I like that Dusenbery brings this up, but also points out that the fact is we shouldn’t need it to be this way.

I will say while the stats are important, it made it a little dry at times because of how statistic heavy it is. There were also a couple times that I felt she kept repeating the same thing. I also felt she could’ve discussed fatphobia and transphobia a little more. I know it’s the main point of the book, and I like that she’s very upfront about that in the beginning. But I think this idea of how no matter what is wrong with you, it’s going to be blamed on your weight or your trans-ness. Like even a broken arm is the example she gives. I would’ve loved to talk more about that.

But I greatly appreciate how often she talks about how the issues are impacting women of color but they are often even more stigmatized in the medical system. Such an incredibly needed discussion. Overall, I think every medical school in the country needs to make a course on bias in medicine and this book should be on the curriculum. Definitely pick it up. Also it was great on audio.

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Amazing characters and a great story

Revisado: 09-11-19

Now I have to say right off the bat, this book was not what I expected it to be. Based off the synopsis, I expected a sort of a cross between a mystery novel and haunted hotel novel. There definitely is a little bit of a mystery here, but not in the same vain as a normal mystery novel. Instead what we get is a story about people, all different types of people, but all discovering themselves in ways they didn't expect. And that's I think what makes this novel so amazing - the characters.

I won't get into all of them but I have to mention a couple. First of all, I don't think I've ever hated a character as viscerally as I hated Viola Fabian when she first appeared. Viola cares about one thing and one thing only - herself. She shows that right off the bat, and one thing I loved is that while we do get to see more of who she is, there's no attempts at redemption. Viola wants power and doesn't care who gets hurt in her attempts to get it.

Fisher Brodie is one of my favorite characters in here. A conductor who was a prodigy, and until he gave it all up in a terrible way, it's just fascinating to see inside his head. He plays piano on a whim as a child and then is whisked off to a stardom he never wanted. Now that's he broken away, he goes on a string of bad relationship (i.e. married women) until meeting one of the characters at the hotel. Now he's in love and he changes his demeanor entirely. Also, he has a little twist in the end that I was kind of thinking would turn out that way and I was right.

Minnie is definitely my favorite character. Ultimately broken by the horrible crime she witnessed, she slowly starts to come back to life after getting a dog. And then she realizes if she ever wants a change she has to go back to the hotel where it all started. After the event, she starts to watch horror movies as a catharsis, and as someone who's worked in trauma, I can tell you that it really works. Minnie is definitely an odd character but also the one with the most heart to me. I just loved her growth throughout the book.

Okay, but now my favorite character - Rabbit Hatmaker. Early on (like within the first 15 pages) we find out that Rabbit is gay and is hoping to use this weekend to tell his twin sister. But instead of coming out, he comes into his own. He starts to realize he doesn't have to live in Alice's shadow, but rather can be his own person. I loved watching him grow, even though there were a couple times that he was so awkward that I wanted to scream and shake him. I definitely would've loved a little more for him on the relationship front at the end, but I also understand why that didn't happen.

Overall I highly recommend this book and if you like it, the audiobook version was great. Jessica Almasy, the narrator, was fantastic.

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Pretty fun story, but eh characters

Revisado: 09-11-19

Overall this was an interesting story. I liked the idea of each witch having a "talent" (i.e. special power) and I think Tamsin was a really well done character. MacCullough did a great job with providing depth to Tamsin and really letting the reader understand what she's feeling having grown up with out a talent.

The plot was also really interesting to me. Essentially, Tamsin is searching for an artifact that keeps changing every time she thinks she finds it. She travels through time with a friend of hers, and discovers the truth about who she is. I thoroughly enjoyed that, but also was a little mad at how long it took her to put the pieces together. But I think that's part of why you keep reading, to make sure she gets there eventually.

But here's the thing. I get writing a college-aged guy as one who makes a lot of jokes, and flirts a lot. But the idea that he does it 100% of the time, even when Tamsin's sister is in literal danger just felt like MacCullough has never actually talked to a guy during a real crisis. And just kept taking me out of the story. Like, I have known a lot of bro-y men in my life. But when someone's in danger or afraid, they don't try to flirt in the middle of it.

Overall, I would say if you've been thinking about picking this up, do it. But I do have to admit the ending didn't leave me clamoring for the sequel. I'm not even sure I'll read it. Definitely suggest the audio version though, as I loved the narrator.

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Should be required reading

Revisado: 09-10-18

You have to do this on audio. It's like Cooper is just sitting next you to telling you everything you didn't know you needed to hear. Her essays are powerful and necessary, but also have such a personal feel to all of them. Cooper discusses everything from rage, respectability politics, exceptionalism, and of course the magic of black women.

I especially love that Cooper is so candid and open. She interweaves statistics and research with her personal experiences, making her essays easy to read compared to other texts that can be a little dry. Her openness is what makes these essays such incredible pieces to read.

I also found it interesting that Cooper didn't hold back on calling out black men for the ways they oppress black women. I knew coming in that she would call out white people (and if you find yourself getting defensive, it's even more imperative you read this book), but I think sometimes it can be hard to call out people that we share traits with. Like I think about how sometimes we're hesitant to call out other queer people because it feels like we'd be hurting the queer movement. But it's incredibly necessary. And that's how I feel here. Cooper knows how important it is to further the liberation of black women, and that means calling out black men when needed.

This is a must read (or listen to) for anyone realizing that they need to have some frank conversations about the way we treat black women in America. So do NOT wait to pick up this book.

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Hilarious and a must listen

Revisado: 08-06-18

I absolutely adored this book. Jeff Woodman is perfect at reading this. His voices were amazing and gave each character such life. And the story is just so funny I could not stop laughing. It's a must listen for anyone.

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I went in blind

Revisado: 09-19-17

And it was everything I could've ever wanted. It was amazing!! I found myself hooked and couldn't stop listening.

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Ferguson brings Lansky's work to life

Revisado: 09-01-17

This isn't an easy book by any means. But I would shove this in the hands of everyone I know. Lansky writes with a rawness that I haven't seen often, and it's what makes this book a must read for me. He's open and vulnerable and pulls no punches.

I was sucked in my how open he was, right off the bat. He talks about his eating disorder, addiction, proclivity for sleeping with older men, all of it. I appreciated his candor and how he doesn't seem to shy away from anything. I especially liked seeing his growth when it came to the addiction, from trying to blame it on his father, to fighting rehab, and ultimately to dealing with it.

I will say, some reviews have suggested that it might be a funny novel, and while it's not necessarily all dark and depressing, I wouldn't suggest that it's funny in a ha-ha way. There's definitely some parts that made me chuckle, but if I'm being honest I think it was more from feeling kinship with some of what Lansky went through. Especially some of the older men he "dated," and I use that term loosely.

I can tell this is a book I'll come back to again and again, and of course I have to say how much I loved it on audio. Cole Ferguson does it again folks, I am telling you.

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Our history is important

Revisado: 08-21-17

This powerful story reminds me over and over how important it is to share queer history with you. Tim Federle also does an amazing job narrating this story. This should be required in high schools and I will definitely listen again and again.

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Great book that had me laughing throughout

Revisado: 08-21-17

Isaac Oliver has had a very interesting life. While choppy in some places, this book was a good lighthearted memoir that had me laughing on my rides to and from work.

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