Austin C. Beeman

Math, Semen, Biological Terror, and M's Lover.

Revisado: 04-07-16

This is an offbeat James Bond novel that is ultimately very compelling. It suffers slightly in the middle of the book, but is well worth listening to. Simon Vance - as usual - is spectacular. Vance does voices (even female and accents) incredibly well and has no problem with the plethora of foreign words in this novel.

The story opens with biological terror attacks around the world. Quickly, we cut to James Bond in Cyprus where biological attacks are occurring against British and Greek military forces. We learn some Cypriot history, are introduced to a sexy Greek agent, and meet a terrorist cult that worships an ancient mathematician.

Back in London, we meet the (Female) M's lover who is quickly killed by the terrorist cult.

Then the book gets a little weird as we go to Texas. James Bond investigates a sperm bank that Felix Leiter believes is working for both an American arms smuggling ring and the terrorist cult. There are far too many scenes and conversations about semen, sperm donation, and Tex-Mex restaurants. This takes up about 90 minutes in the middle of the audiobook. It makes perfect sense for the plot, but this is weird territory for a Bond novel.

There is also far too much 'explaining personal computers' from a 1990s perspective that is strange to a modern audience. There is a scene where 3 people are in a room and one explains to the other how to copy a JPEG.

I won't reveal more, but rest assured that we return to Cyprus and Greece for an exotic, violent, and action packed last few hours. It also takes breaks for atmospheric 'travelogue' scenes including a memorable casino sequence and delicious dinner in Greece.

Even a weird James Bond novel is still really good and Raymond Benson is the 2nd best Bond novelist. Minus the Texas sequence, this would have been a very great Bond novel.

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Action-Packed and Entwined with Hong Kong History

Revisado: 12-13-15

Zero Minus Ten is one of the best of the "non-Fleming" James Bond novels and is expertly read by Simon Vance.

This book feels like the novelization of an unused Daniel Craig Bond script. Lots of brutal action that is very visually described, featuring a James Bond that is physically very powerful. The locations are described well (Hong Kong, Macau, and the Australian Outback.) The right amount of leisure and travel-writing occurs with games of Mah-Jong and an Australian Walkabout.

Definitely worth a listen for any James Bond fan.

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James Bond vs Suicide Bombings

Revisado: 11-17-15

John Gardner writes spy novels that happen to feature James Bond. This one has Bond going against an arms dealer who also runs a religious cult that produces suicide bombers.

Takes about two hours to get moving but then the horror and suspense starts and you get going to the finish. No luxury or exotic locations, just a macabre and brutal psycological thriller.

One of the better Gardner Bond books and very well performed by Simon Vance.

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Sexy, Funny, Stupid, Violent, and Kinda Wonderful

Revisado: 12-13-12

If William Gibson, Kevin Smith, and Quentin Tarantino had sex in the back of Jack Kerouac's car - this book would be the baby.

Mind-controlled cars. Drugged up anti-heroes with lots of hilarious wise-cracking. An all-devouring MegaStore that turns it's customer's into zombies. And lots of beer and lust and other stuff.

Until we get a movie version, this audiobook is a great substitute.

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Unique SciFi Novel (Hugo Award Winner) hampered...

Revisado: 12-13-12

What did you love best about The Big Time?

Brilliant and unique story told through dialogue like a stage play. Captures unity of place, time, and theme. Mandatory read for a true science fiction fan

What was one of the most memorable moments of The Big Time?

When a character describes her resurrection into The Big Time.

What three words best describe Suzanne Toren’s performance?

Poor Male Voices.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

Anytime Greta (main character) describes her death during the Nazi overthrow of Chicago in the 1950s.

Any additional comments?

Essential reading, but maybe not essential listening. But if you can handle poor male voices from a female narrator, everything else is excellent.

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Interesting Story. Unfunny Narrator

Revisado: 10-01-12

If you could sum up Lullaby in three words, what would they be?

Dead Baby Poem.

How would you have changed the story to make it more enjoyable?

The story was fine for the wacky road trip ride that it was. A little more closure would have been nice, but nobody expects that from a Palahnuik book.

What didn’t you like about Richard Poe’s performance?

He didn't understand that this story was gonzo and supposed to be funny. This book should have been read by a comedian. Poe was too serious and spoke way too slowly.

Who was the most memorable character of Lullaby and why?

The main lady who continually sells Haunted House over and over again to maximize her commissions.

Any additional comments?

If you listen to this book on 2X speed, it will be more that way the narration should have been.

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