Mike

So much potential

Revisado: 07-22-22

This story and concept are super interesting! I love the idea of a college student heist. The author made each of the five main characters interesting and represent five different Chinese American experiences. HOWEVER, the execution was lacking. Several times I felt like I was listening to a first draft. A lot of the internal musings of the main characters were incredibly receptive and “told” me a lot that could have been “shown” to me in a more interesting way. I found myself editing the writing in my head while listening. “It had been ten years” and “after ten years” to describe the relationship between three characters got old in its repetition. I honestly hope she does a revised edition! I would read it. Also would make a great movie with some cleaned up dialogue and a medium that would force you to cut the annoying repetitive musings about being almost done with college and not knowing what comes next.

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