PALMIRA PENA SALAZAR

It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissist. One day they draw you in with their confidence and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-confidence, and leave you wondering, What could I have done differently? As Dr. Ramani Durvasula reveals in It's Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing. Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist won’t stop manipulating and invalidating you. To heal in the aftermath of their abuse and protect yourself from future harm, you first have to accept that you are not to blame.

David Richo draws from history, Jungian psychology, Buddhism, nature, and other spiritual traditions to illuminate our connection to the “helpers” we can call upon to navigate life. Some of the assisting forces in our lives are visible, and some are invisible. Some are with us for life; some come and go. Spiritual assisting forces could be bodhisattvas and saints—or partners in a relationship who are allies to one another. In this fascinating inquiry, Richo posits that the archetype of the ally is necessary if we want to connect with the richness of our lives.

Do we stay in what we know? Or is it the right time to leave and make a change? In more than 50 years as a psychotherapist David Richo has been asked versions of this question more than any other, coaching countless people of all ages through agonizing decisions related to their partnerships, their career, their home, their faith. In Ready, he shares the deep wisdom we need to make these decisions—and feel confident in following through. The book looks at the mystery of timing, why we stay too long, why we leave too soon, and what it feels like when the timing is right.