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With only three days left until the predicted apocalypse, the small town of Franklin Springs, Georgia, has become a wasteland of abandoned cars, abandoned homes, abandoned businesses, and abandoned people. People like Rainbow Williams. Rain isn't afraid of dying. In fact, she's looking forward to it. If she can just outrun her pain until April 23, she'll never have to feel it at all.

"Since when are you into guys in ties? You only like guys who look like they rob guys in ties. At gunpoint." It was true. By 2003, my type had been well-established. There might as well have been a giant sign on my heart that said, "Good Guys Need Not Apply." Which is exactly why I had to friend-zone Ken Easton. The man was a former football star, smelled like fresh laundry instead of stale cigarettes, and had more ties in his closet than tattoos on his knuckles. Pssh. BOR-ING.

In 1999, I met my Prince Charming. He was the tall, tattooed, wickedly handsome bass player for the up-and-coming rock band, Phantom Limb. But, more importantly, he was mine. I knew it the moment he flashed me that shy, dimpled smile. And he knew it too. Hansel "Hans" Oppenheimer wore his heart on one sleeve and scrawled lyrics about me on the other. Unlike the losers of my past, Hans showered me with tenderness, took me places I'd never been before, and showed me the type of all-consuming love I'd thought only existed in fairy tales.

Ronald "Knight" McKnight was obsessive. Possessive. Downright psychopathic. But that didn't stop me from falling in love with him...or falling apart when he joined the Marines. When he left, Knight told me to "find someone better", but I didn't. I found Harley instead. Harley James was a fun, flirty, tattooed mechanic whose face was as angelic as his secrets were sinful. He taught me how to live again. How to laugh again. But would he teach me how to love again?

In 1997, Ronald "Knight" McKnight was the meanest, most misunderstood boy at Peach State High School...perhaps on the entire planet. Knight hated everyone, except for me, BB - the perky, quirky punk chick with the locker next to his. I, on the other hand, liked everybody...except for Knight. I was scared to death of him, actually. All I wanted was to marry Prince Eric-lookalike and king of the Peach State High punk scene Lance Hightower and have a million of his babies. Unfortunately for me, Knight was even better at getting his way than I was.

This audiobook is a laugh-out-loud funny and brutally honest look at female sexuality, as told through the razor-sharp lens of domesticated bad girl BB Easton. No one and nothing is off limits as BB revisits the ex-boyfriends - a sadistic tattoo artist, a punk-rock parolee, and a heavy-metal bass player - that led her to finally find true love with a straitlaced, drop-dead-gorgeous...accountant. After settling down and starting a family with her perfectly vanilla "husbot", Ken, BB finds herself longing for the reckless passion she had in her youth.