Brett C.

Every family has a dirty uncle. In my family, it was Uncle Dan. Pour a couple beers in him, and he’d start telling inappropriate jokes in front of the whole disapproving family. “A girl only has one heart, so playing with her heart is wrong,” Uncle Dan advised. “Play with her boobs instead -- she’s got two of those.” “I’m feeling a bit depressed today: I just noticed I’ve got a gray pubic hair,” he said. “I didn’t freak out too much when I found it, but the people in the elevator with me looked horrified.” Uncle Dan shook his head sadly and said, “Some people say...