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What Makes Love Last?
- How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal
- Narrated by: Peter Berkrot
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
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Publisher's summary
Dr. John Gottman, the country's preeminent researcher on marriage, is famous for his Love Lab at the University of Washington in Seattle where he deciphers the mysteries of human relationships through scientific research. His 35 years of exploration have earned him numerous awards, including from the National Institute of Mental Health, the American Psychological Association, and the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. Now, Dr. Gottman offers surprising findings and advice on the characteristic that is at the heart of all relationships: trust. Dr. Gottman has developed a formula that precisely calculates any couple's loyalty level. The results determine a relationship's likely future, including the potential for one or both partners to stray.
What Makes Love Last? shows couples how to bolster their trust level and avoid what Dr. Gottman calls the "Roach Motel for Lovers". He describes how the outcome of "sliding door moments", small pivotal points between a couple, can lead either to more emotional connection or to discontent. He suggests a new approach to handling adultery and reveals the varied and unexpected nonsexual ways that couples often betray each other.
What Makes Love Last? guides couples through an empirically tested, trust-building program that will help them repair and maintain any long-term, intimate romantic relationship.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
Critic reviews
"The practical tools to evaluate current relationships and step-by-step methods for avoiding betrayal, repairing relationships heading toward crisis, or healing a relationship after a crisis will be useful to couples who want to look honestly at healing chronic hurts and improving the state of their relationship, and are ready for a system to help them." (Publishers Weekly)
Featured Article: The Best Listens on Marriage for Every Couple
The word "marriage" may conjure images of extravagant clothes, gold rings, and reciting vows on a tropical beach at sunset. But those are all features of a wedding, not a marriage. Marriage itself is a far more difficult and consequential endeavor that, in an ideal scenario, will last a lifetime. So whether you’re preparing to take the plunge or looking to strengthen your marriage, it's never a bad idea to get advice from a variety of trusted sources.
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We Love Each Other, But... offers simple, practical tips that will help you restore and strengthen a relationship that has gone off track. It lays out the nuts and bolts of building relationships so they continue to be gratifying over the long haul. Dr. Ellen Wachtel shows how, even when you feel like giving up on a relationship or marriage, you can recapture why you fell in love in the first place. Dr. Wachtel promises that there is more and suggests simple ways to keep vitality in relationships.
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Some interesting material
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By: Ellen Wachtel
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Feeling Good Together
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Based on 25 years of clinical experience and new, groundbreaking research involving more than 1,000 individuals, Feeling Good Together is filled with helpful examples and tools, such as the Relationship Satisfaction Test, the Blame Cost-Benefit Analysis, the Relationship Journal, Five Secrets of Effective Communication, the Intimacy Exercise, and more. Using these techniques, Dr. Burns shows you how to resolve virtually any kind of relationship conflict almost instantly.
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Best yet for communications Skills
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When Friendship Hurts
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We’ve all had friendships that have gone bad. Whether it takes the form of a simple yet inexplicable estrangement or a devastating betrayal, a failed friendship can make your life miserable, threaten your success at work or school, and even undermine your romantic relationships. Finally there is help. In When Friendship Hurts, Jan Yager, recognized internationally as a leading expert on friendship, explores what causes friendships to falter and explains how to mend them - or end them.
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Good Book
- By Qalb-e-Saleem on 12-11-12
By: Jan Yager Ph.D.
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
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- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
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The Happy Stepmother
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You found the love of your life, and you vowed to have, to hold, and to stepmother. You always thought that in time you'd grow to be the perfect, loving family. So why does it seem that the harder you try, the more unappreciated you feel? As a stepmother, therapist, and founder of the popular stepsforstepmothers.com, Dr. Rachelle Katz knows all too well how challenging stepmotherhood can be. Based on thousands of in-depth interviews and the latest research, she's created a powerful program to help you.
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horrible
- By Marcia R on 02-07-17
By: Rachelle Katz
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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The Undervalued Self
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
- By Dawn Mitchell on 09-20-15
By: Elaine N. Aron
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Keeping Love Alive as Memories Fade
- The 5 Love Languages and the Alzheimer's Journey
- By: Gary Chapman, Edward G. Shaw, Debbie Barr
- Narrated by: Jon Gauger
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If you're listening to this, you may have a loved one suffering from dementia, and you're looking for hope. The disease has already taken so much, and though you're determined to fight, you're weary. Keeping Love Alive as Memories Fade will renew your strength. With guidance from professionals and stories of committed caregivers, you'll learn how others have braved the road ahead and how you can, too. Using the five love languages and other creative ideas, you can discover, like many others, the resilient power of love.
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Informative & Practical
- By kerryleigh on 11-29-16
By: Gary Chapman, and others
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Rethinking Narcissism
- The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
- By: Dr. Craig Malkin
- Narrated by: Kiff VandenHeuvel
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
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In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self.
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Great info, but proceed with caution
- By Caterina M. Platt on 11-16-17
By: Dr. Craig Malkin
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Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
- By Brookley on 09-19-18
By: Gary Chapman
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Living with the Passive-Aggressive Man
- Coping with Hidden Aggression - From the Bedroom to the Boardroom
- By: Scott Wetzler Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
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Do you know one of these men? The catch-me-if-you-can lover...Phil's romantic and passionate one minute, distant and cold the next. The deviously manipulative coworker or boss...Jack denies resenting Nora's rapid rise in the company, but when they're assigned to work together on a project, he undermines her. The obstructionist, procrastinating husband...Bob keeps telling his wife he'll finish the painting job he began years ago, but he never seems to get around to it. These are all classic examples of the passive aggressive man.
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A good review of the PA type man
- By Dew on 12-29-17
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Why Mars and Venus Collide
- Understanding How Men and Women Cope Differently with Stress
- By: John Gray
- Narrated by: John Gray
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
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Once upon a time, Martians and Venusians functioned in separate worlds. But in today's hectic and career-oriented environment, relationships have become a lot more complicated, and men and women are experiencing unprecedented levels of stress. To add to the increasing tension, most men and women are also completely unaware that they are actually hardwired to react differently to the stress.
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Very insightful & evokative for introspection
- By Amazon Customer on 02-04-12
By: John Gray
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Having a baby is a joyous experience, but even the best relationships are strained during the transition from duo to trio. Lack of sleep, never-ending housework, and new fiscal concerns often lead to conflict, disappointment, and hurt feelings. In And Baby Makes Three, Love Lab™ experts John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman teach couples the skills from their successful workshops, so partners can avoid the pitfalls of parenthood.
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This book can change your life! WOW!
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In Sex Outside the Lines, Dr. Chris Donaghue describes the holes in society's definition of "normal", taking a sharp eye to institutions such as marriage, cheating, virginity, identity, and sexual orientation. He also examines all the ways that accepting society's "truths" have led to the demise of long-term relationships and sexual pleasure. All of this misinformation is showing up in your bedroom and preventing you from having the sex life you're entitled to.
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Mind blown
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Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for “friendships” that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.
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WORST to Read/Listen to if you are well past D Day
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How to Talk, Listen, and Forgive
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Stop pushing each other away. Learn to build bridges instead of walls—even when you disagree. Satisfying relationships are built on the foundation of being heard, understood, and validated. Miscommunication can lead to conflict, misunderstandings, and loneliness. Uncover why your efforts at connection might be failing. In How to Talk, Listen, and Forgive, Zoe McKey addresses the core issues that prevent healthy communication. Learn how to respond rather than react, how to empathize even when -especially when- it’s hard, and maintain a secure bond over the long haul. This book provides ...
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Boring
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What listeners say about What Makes Love Last?
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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- Aaron
- 03-20-14
The Key
What made the experience of listening to What Makes Love Last? the most enjoyable?
The insights - practical, profound - are marriage changing and life changing.
What did you like best about this story?
I immediately put to work the guidance on myself and with communicating with my wife, and there is a cloud of tension already lifting. We have hot spot topics that we typically avoid, to avoid arguing. But this book gave me a guide and the courage to open up that conversation, it happened lovingly and respectfully. It's a change I've been wishing for.
Any additional comments?
If you want to create more joy and connection in your marriage, regardless of being stuck in negative discontent or happy and content this book with bring you up. I give it my highest recommendation.
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8 people found this helpful
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- Kai Ellis
- 04-27-13
Read by Quagmire from Family Guy...
What made the experience of listening to What Makes Love Last? the most enjoyable?
Gottman is a seasoned expert on the subject of successful relationships.
What was one of the most memorable moments of What Makes Love Last??
The samples of dialogue between the therapist and various couples helped illustrate principles to me.
Did Peter Berkrot do a good job differentiating all the characters? How?
No :( His tone and inflection were the same for all samples of dialogue - but that's not really a big deal to me. What continually took me out of the book was how much he sounds like Quagmire from Family Guy.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?
Want to know if you're going to get divorced? The answers are inside...
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9 people found this helpful
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- Steve
- 03-19-18
Great info
I liked this book a lot. I haven’t implemented any of it yet, but it aligns with other things I have read and incorporated into my relationship. The narrators voice trails off a lot, and made it hard to hear in the car sometimes. It was kind of irritating. Great book anyway.
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- Dallassa C Hale
- 06-22-17
Best Relationship Advice
Gottman hits it right on the head every time. sound relationship advice for every couple
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- David
- 02-21-14
Very practical
Really interesting. I appreciate his research based approach. I particularly enjoyed learning more relationship recovery techniques. I also saw areas where I need to be more careful with my relationships. This was a very readable book. Of this genre, he lacks the underlying grand theory that you find in Harville Hendrix and others, but this is a much more practical approach.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Joshua
- 10-23-16
Narrator is annoying but good book
I liked the info and examples, but the dialogue acted out by the narrator was super annoying.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Katrina
- 06-28-18
Wish I had read this long ago
very helpful, sage advice. Will listen again. Worth your while will share with others I care about
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- Amazon Customer
- 05-05-22
highly recommend
This book just spells it all out so clearly. I appreciate Dr Gottmans' wisdom and scientific study that provides answers to the ins and outs of a good marriage, and exposes what an unhealthy one is.
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- Mr. Smith
- 09-19-13
Hand it out to every engaged couple
What did you love best about What Makes Love Last??
This book is amazing - if you ever asked the question. This is the answer. Well written, well read - worth the buy. This book bundled with Hold me tight is all you need.
If you are single i recommend 'attached' however this is also a great book to have. '
What was one of the most memorable moments of What Makes Love Last??
Know when you are 'flooding' during an argument, and understand the horsemen.
What about Peter Berkrot’s performance did you like?
Enjoyable
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
The whole book has a lot of useful info.
Any additional comments?
Has some great info on affairs - I would also recommend 'Just Friends'
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15 people found this helpful
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- Terry B
- 01-19-17
A Roadmap to Long Term Happiness
This book may be what saved my marriage; my very life. In it I found a short yet profound scientific approach to understanding love and long-term marriage success, regardless of circumstance or religious creed. Upon reading it I became overwhelmed with epiphanies and experienced a cascade of internal change which, while aimed at improving the relationship with my incredible spouse, has benefited me well beyond the proverbial walls of my marriage. I would highly recommend this to anyone willing to take an honest, measured and critical look at their life and themselves. Reading it with a partner will only amplify it's benefits and I look forward to putting in the work with the aids that come with the hard copy version.
Thank you Dr's Julie and John Gottman and all your staff. Your work is meaningful and greatly appreciated.
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3 people found this helpful