Shameless
A Sexual Reformation
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Narrated by:
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Nadia Bolz-Weber
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By:
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Nadia Bolz-Weber
About this listen
Raw, intimate, and timely, Nadia Bolz-Weber’s latest book offers a full-blown overhaul of our harmful and antiquated ideas about sex, gender, and our bodies.
Christians are obsessed with sex. But not in a good way. For generations countless people have suffered pain, guilt, and judgment as a result of this toxic fixation on sex, the body, and physical pleasure. In the follow-up to her celebrated New York Times best seller Accidental Saints, Bolz-Weber unleashes her critical eye, her sharp pen, and her vulnerable but hopeful soul on the caustic, fear-riddled, and religiously inspired messages about sex that have fed our shame.
In turn, Bolz-Weber offers no simple amendments or polite compromises, because the stakes are too high - and our souls and our bodies are worth too much. Instead, this tattooed, swearing, modern-day pastor calls for a new reformation. She urges us to take antiquated, sexist ideas about sex, gender, and our bodies and “burn them the f--k down and start all over.”
This is a journey of holy resistance. Along the way, as antidotes to shame, heresy, and all-too-familiar injustice, Bolz-Weber dispenses grace, freedom, and courage. She shares stories, poetry, and scripture, cultivating resilient hope and audacious love rooted in good news that is “powerful enough, transgressive enough, and beautiful enough to heal not only the ones who have been hurt but also those who have done the hurting.”
In Bolz-Weber’s most personal, bracingly honest book yet, she shares intimately about her life, with her trademark blend of vulnerability, humor, and candor. If you’ve been mistreated, confused, angered, and/or wounded by the shaming sexual messages so prevalent in religion, this one is for you. Includes a PDF of images and drawings from the book.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2019 Nadia Bolz-Weber (P)2019 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Shameless is a triumph. Nadia Bolz-Weber returns to readers the gift toxic religion and consumer culture stole: the gift of sexuality. Her wisdom is unparalleled, her vulnerability touching, her storytelling masterful, and her perspective both ancient and fresh. Shameless will give its readers their joy, relationships, and freedom back.” (Glennon Doyle, author of number-one New York Times best seller Love Warrior, Founder and President of Together Rising)
“Shameless is one of the most important, life-changing books I’ve ever read. Expertly-crafted and lovingly delivered, it serves as both a bomb and a balm - blowing up the lies religion teaches about sex and tenderly healing the wounds those messages have inflicted. Pastoral and prophetic, Shameless weaves together history, theology, biblical studies, personal narrative, and sex ed, without ever losing sight of its most important aim - honoring the dignity of actual human beings living actual, messy and beautiful lives. It’s Nadia Bolz-Weber’s best book yet. And that’s saying something.” (Rachel Held Evans, author of Searching for Sunday and Inspired)
“If the conversation around sex in the Church has felt like a small, cramped room to you, brace yourself: Nadia Bolz-Weber is about to kick in the door, hustle you outside, and burn down the room as you march out into the fresh air. This irreverent, bold, and authentic book is deeply centered in love and the transforming goodness of God. If ever there was a time for the Church to disrupt the world's broken notions around sex, gender, masculinity, and power with this sort of a shameless reformation, it is now. And Nadia is the loving, hopeful, wise, take-no-prisoners disruptor we've been waiting for.” (Sarah Bessey, author of Jesus Feminist and Out of Sorts)
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In the 1990s, a “purity industry” emerged out of the white evangelical Christian culture. Purity rings, purity pledges, and purity balls came with a dangerous message: girls are potential sexual “stumbling blocks” for boys and men, and any expression of a girl’s sexuality could reflect the corruption of her character. This message traumatized many girls - resulting in anxiety, fear, and experiences that mimicked the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder - and trapped them in a cycle of shame.
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I expected a different ending I suppose
- By Military Dad on 12-12-18
By: Linda Kay Klein
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A War of Loves
- The Unexpected Story of a Gay Activist Discovering Jesus
- By: David Bennett
- Narrated by: David Bennett
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Author David Bennett came out to his parents as gay when he was 14 and entered Sydney's active gay community a few years later. In A War of Loves, he shares his growing desire as a gay rights activist to see justice for LGBTQI people, his journey through new age religions and French existentialism, and his university years as a postmodernist - before Jesus Christ showed up in his life in a highly unexpected way, leading him down a path he never would have imagined or predicted.
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The intersection of LGBTQI and Christianity
- By JeremiahL on 03-11-20
By: David Bennett
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I'd Like You More If You Were More like Me
- Getting Real About Getting Close
- By: John Ortberg
- Narrated by: Dean Gallagher
- Length: 8 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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I'd Like You More If You Were More like Me takes on one of life's most important questions: How can I get closer to God and other people? We were created for deep connections. When people have deep connections, says John Ortberg, they win in life. When they don't have deep connections, they cannot win in life. I'd Like You More If You Were More like Me offers help in overcoming one of the biggest obstacles to making deep connections: the fact that we're so different. Different from God and different from each other.
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Terrible Title Fabulous Book!
- By 3boymama on 10-03-18
By: John Ortberg
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Sex, Mom, and God
- How the Bible's Strange Take on Sex Led to Crazy Politics - and How I Learned to Love Women (and Jesus) Anyway
- By: Frank Schaeffer
- Narrated by: Frank Schaeffer
- Length: 8 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Alternating between laugh-out-loud scenes from his childhood and acidic ruminations on the present state of an America he and his famous fundamentalist parents helped create, best-selling author Frank Schaeffer asks what the Glenn Becks and the Rush Limbaughs and the paranoid fantasies of the “right-wing echo chamber” are really all about. Here’s a hint: sex.
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Entertaining and enlightening
- By Listens-a-lot on 11-16-11
By: Frank Schaeffer
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Party of One
- Truth, Longing, and the Subtle Art of Singleness
- By: Joy Beth Smith
- Narrated by: Madeleine Rose
- Length: 5 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Did you enter adulthood thinking marriage would find you, only to end up at a second-cousin's wedding, dodging yet another bouquet the night before you turned 30? Maybe you've started wondering if this the best the single life has to offer. Joy Beth Smith says it's not - that single life doesn't have to leave you constantly waiting for real life to begin. If you let go of the tired lies weighing you down, you can turn toward truth.
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Have hope, but don’t wait...
- By Jules on 10-20-18
By: Joy Beth Smith
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Prototype
- What Happens When You Discover You're More Like Jesus Than You Think?
- By: Jonathan Martin
- Narrated by: Jonathan Martin
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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In Prototype, Jonathan Martin creates a vivid understanding of what it means to be God's beloved. To completely trust, as Jesus did, that God loves us. To live without fear, confident in our identity and purpose. To handle life's wounds as Jesus did, and to wake every day with a deep awareness of God's presence. Martin reveals a startling truth at the heart of the gospel: Jesus is our prototype. And as we discover how the knowledge of being God's beloved changed everything for Jesus - how it set Him free to live out His purpose and love God, others, and the world - it will begin to do the same for us.
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A Game Changer
- By Atalie on 08-09-13
By: Jonathan Martin
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Rumors of God
- Experience the Kind of Faith You've Only Heard About
- By: Darren Whitehead, Jon Tyson
- Narrated by: Darren Whitehead, Jon Tyson
- Length: 4 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Where is the life God promised us? Life is busy. We live like slaves to our fast-paced, suffocating schedules. We spend our energy and time in triviality, relegating God to the background. He seems distant to us, and we resist the idea that God wants to give, say, and show us more; we dismiss it as rumor. But Jesus calls us to a better way. Another dream - an unimagined future. Close the gap between what you hear about and what you see.
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Excellent book
- By S. HARRIS on 06-24-15
By: Darren Whitehead, and others
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Upside-Down Spirituality
- The 9 Essential Failures of a Faithful Life
- By: Chad Bird
- Narrated by: Brandon Batchelar
- Length: 6 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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In our age when the church can too often seem like a poor copy of the world, Chad Bird challenges us to reclaim the astounding originality of our ancient, backward faith. With compelling examples from the Bible and today, Bird paints an enticing picture of the counterintuitive, countercultural life that God wants for us. He helps listeners delight in all of the ways that Jesus turned the world upside down, allowing us to experience true freedom, not from our weaknesses but in the midst of them.
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Great messages for today
- By Fred M on 07-24-22
By: Chad Bird
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The Mystery
- Finding True Love in a World of Broken Lovers
- By: Lacey Sturm
- Narrated by: Lacey Sturm
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Rock princess Lacey Sturm wants to share her journey from heartbreak to wholeness with young women. In The Mystery, Sturm helps listeners understand that any loving relationship begins with knowing your own identity in Christ. And yet, so many people have learned to define love through their own dysfunctional family, unhealthy relationships, the romances and wrecked relationships of mainstream pop culture, or, sadly, through pornography. Is it any wonder so many people end up brokenhearted, divorced, abused, abusive, or even suicidal?
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Wow! Incredibly moving.
- By Mae on 12-30-19
By: Lacey Sturm
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Becoming Myself
- Embracing God's Dream of You
- By: Stasi Eldredge
- Narrated by: Stasi Eldredge
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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God has dreams - just for you. Becoming Myself is a hope-filled audiobook for anyone who wonders if her life will ever change - if she will ever change. In Stasi Eldredge’s most intimate work yet, she shares her own struggles with self-worth, addiction, and her past as she shows listeners how God is faithfully bringing us to a life of freedom and wholeness. God desires to restore us, and he is able to restore us - the real us. As he heals our inner life he calls us to "rise to the occasion" of our lives.
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Powerful!!
- By Rick on 01-25-14
By: Stasi Eldredge
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Idol Lies
- Facing the Truth about Our Deepest Desires
- By: Dee Brestin
- Narrated by: Eunice Arant
- Length: 4 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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What's hiding in your heart? Deep down, every woman longs to feel loved and secure. We may think we look to God for these things, but in reality we often run to food, Facebook, or friendship first. Worshipping God’s gifts is idolatry. And idolatry destroys intimacy with God and steals our joy. In this audiobook, author Dee Brestin brings unfailing principles and vivid testimonies - from Scripture, her own life, and the lives of women who have tested these truths and are excited to tell about their transformations.
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This is the book I was looking for!
- By Amanda Baskin on 04-18-21
By: Dee Brestin
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Lord Foulgrin's Letters
- By: Randy Alcorn
- Narrated by: Frank Muller
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Abridged
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Correspondence has fallen into our hands that we were not intended to see. Foulgrin, a high-ranking demon, instructs his subordinate how to deceive and destroy Jordan Fletcher and his family. It's like placing a bugging device in hell's war room, where we overhear our enemies assessing our weaknesses and strategizing attack. To win the battle, we must know our God, know ourselves, and know our enemy. Lord Foulgrin's Letters is written to help us become better acquainted with each.
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Wonderful!
- By BookLady on 04-27-10
By: Randy Alcorn
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Free to Be Me
- Becoming the Young Woman God Created You to Be
- By: Stasi Eldredge
- Narrated by: Aimee Lilly
- Length: 6 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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God has dreams - just for you. You are on the most important journey you’ll ever take - the journey of becoming yourself through the love of God. You might sometimes feel inadequate in the world’s eyes, but the truth is that you are beautiful, valuable, and made with a purpose!In Free to Be Me, Stasi Eldredge tells stories about her own struggles and hopes as she helps you recognize God’s truth about your beauty and worthiness. Learn who God created you to be and the amazing dreams he has for you.
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Adapted version of Becoming Myself
- By survivorman29 on 05-11-17
By: Stasi Eldredge
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Every Young Man's Battle
- Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation
- By: Stephen Arterburn, Fred Stoeker
- Narrated by: Joe Geoffrey
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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In this world you're surrounded by sexual images that open the door to temptation. They're everywhere - on TV, billboards, magazines, music, the Internet and so easy to access that it sometimes feels impossible to escape their clutches. Yet God expects his children to be sexually pure. So how can you survive the relentless battle against temptation? Here's powerful ammunition. Steve Arterburn and Fred Stoeker now focus on the temptations young single Christian men like you face every day.
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Not discussing the real.
- By Bob on 12-25-19
By: Stephen Arterburn, and others
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Out of Sorts
- Making Peace with an Evolving Faith
- By: Sarah Bessey
- Narrated by: Joell A. Jacob
- Length: 7 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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In Out of Sorts, Sarah Bessey, award-winning blogger and author of Jesus Feminist, helps us grapple with core Christian issues using a mixture of beautiful storytelling and biblical teaching. As she candidly shares her wrestlings with core issues - such as who Jesus is, what place the church has in our lives, how to disagree yet remain within a community, and how to love the Bible for what it is rather than what we want it to be - she teaches us how to walk courageously through our own tough questions.
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Sounded like a robot reading this!
- By KNimblett on 02-23-16
By: Sarah Bessey
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The Bad Habits of Jesus
- Showing Us the Way to Live Right in a World Gone Wrong
- By: Leonard Sweet
- Narrated by: Dean Gallagher
- Length: 4 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Did Jesus have bad habits? In our culture we have a tendency to describe Jesus in ways that soften his revolutionary edge. Len Sweet uncovers and presents to us the offensive and scandalous Jesus described in the Bible. Did he disappear when people needed him most? Yes. Did he refuse to answer questions directly? Yes. Did Jesus offend the people of his day? Absolutely yes. Popular author and speaker Len Sweet examines the words and actions of Jesus and places them in context.
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My I have the bad habits of Jesus
- By Bob I. on 02-26-17
By: Leonard Sweet
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Eternity Is Now in Session
- A Radical Rediscovery of What Jesus Really Taught About Salvation, Eternity, and Getting to the Good Place
- By: John Ortberg
- Narrated by: Dean Gallagher
- Length: 4 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author John Ortberg dispels the myth that eternal life is something way out in outer space that we can only hope to experience after we die - and that being saved is merely about meeting the minimal entrance requirements for getting into heaven. Instead, John unpacks the reality that the moment we trust Christ, we are initiated into “eternal living” with God as a here and now reality, one that will continue beyond our life on this earth.
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Speaker
- By Karla J Altman on 06-14-20
By: John Ortberg
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great content.
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Beyond Shame
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We all carry sexual shame. Whether we grew up in the repressive purity culture of American Evangelical Christianity or not, we've all been taught in subtle and not-so-subtle ways that sex (outside of very specific contexts) is immoral and taboo. Psychotherapist Matthias Roberts helps listeners overcome their shame around sex by overcoming three unhealthy coping mechanisms we use to manage that shame.
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Good info, but author is close minded
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WoW wOw WoW
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Rooted in her experiences growing up in an evangelical Christian family, Jamie Lee Finch’s You Are Your Own offers an overview of evangelicalism and the painful confusion and anxiety experienced under its demands. Finch explores the mechanisms of trauma and how fundamentalist denominations match the patterns connected with PTSD. She elaborates on the doubt, guilt, fear, and grief that haunt those leaving the evangelical faith and offers an approach to help them recover healthy self-worth and resilience.
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Forbidden Flowers
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This is the better-than-ever sequel to My Secret Garden, the first time in print that American women told their most honest sexual fantasies without apology or shame. Daring, explicit, and straight from the heart, Nancy Friday got thousands of women to tell her what they'd never confided to their best friends, lovers, or husbands - every secret that women didn't know they could say out loud. A brilliant cast brings to life women from every walk of life and region to tell women's erotic life as it really is.
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There are plenty of books about sex. But this is one of the only books that shows you how to actually talk about it. Because how are you supposed to have an extraordinary sex life if you can’t even discuss it openly with your partner? Sex Talks is here to change that. Together, sex therapist Vanessa Marin and her husband, Xander, show you that the best thing you can do for your sex life doesn’t even involve taking off your clothes.
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A lightbulb came on! Wow this book is insightful!
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For much of the 20th and 21st centuries, women’s sexuality was an uncharted territory in science, studied far less frequently - and far less seriously - than its male counterpart. That is, until Emily Nagoski’s Come As You Are, which used groundbreaking science and research to prove that the most important factor in creating and sustaining a sex life filled with confidence and joy is not what the parts are or how they’re organized but how you feel about them.
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What listeners say about Shameless
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Mags
- 06-07-19
Healing the Hurt of THE Church!
A must-teach text for all churches to adopt. 'Bout damn time, too. Timely for inclusivity needs in the United Methodist Church, increasing abortion restrictions, reformation needs in the Catholic and the Southern Baptist Churches, and for anyone who knows God is LOVE but didn't know that churches that don't preach this first and foremost missed the mark, and that there are ones that do and that will accept you - as you are, because namaste everyone. We are ALL children of God.
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- Neyhart
- 02-07-19
Pastoral, Healing, Water for a dry and weary soul
The first words that come to my mind to describe “Shameless” by Nadia Bolz-Weber are pastoral, healing, water for a dry and weary soul.
The money quote for me came in the introduction:
"We should not be more loyal to an idea, a doctrine, or an interpretation of a Bible verse than we are to people. If the teachings of the church are harming the bodies and spirits of people, we should rethink those teachings." (5)
Right after that, Nadia reminds us that 500 years ago Martin Luther took a close look at the harm in his parishioners’ spiritual lives. In his case he focused on the damage that came from them trying to fulfill sacramental obligations that the church said would appease an angry God. Luther was bold and daring enough to believe that Christians could find freedom from the harm their church and done to them: “Luther was less loyal to the teachings of the church than he was to people, and this helped spark what is now known as the Protestant Reformation." (5)
I also loved the illustration of the irrigation system that only waters in a circular pattern, leaving the corners and edges of the farmland without water. Nadia says this book is for those un-watered places, for the ones who do not fit inside the small circle of the church’s behavior codes. "This book […] is water, I hope, for those planted in the corners. [...] This book is for the young Evangelical who silently disagrees with the church’s stance on sex and sexual orientation, yet feels alone in that silence. This book is for anyone who wonders, even subconsciously: Has the church obsessed over this too much? Do we really think we’ve gotten it right?"
Nadia writes, “our sexual and gender expressions are as integral to who we are as our religious upbringings are. To separate these aspects of ourselves—to separate life as a sexual being from a life with God—is to bifurcate our psyche, like a musical progression that never comes to resolution."
Nadia makes me laugh several times throughout the book also: “So if the traditional teachings of the church around sex and the body have caused no harm in the lives of the people around you, and have even provided them a plan for true human flourishing, then this book probably is not for you. (Good news, though: the Christian publishing world is your oyster. There you’ll find no lack of books to uphold and even help you double down on your beliefs.)"
She made me laugh again at the end of chapter 5. In this chapter Nadia talks about the day that she and several of her parishioners worked together to write their "Denver Statement" in response to "The Nashville Statement". She then showed us snippets from both. The very end of The Nashville Statement says, “WE DENY that the Lord’s arm is too short to save or that any sinner is beyond his reach." The counter line from The Denver Statement says, “WE DENY that God is a boy and has actual arms." 😂
Other quotes and passages that really struck me:
From the introduction:
- "I will not indulge in the sin of false equivalency. To admit that both the church and our culture can cause harm is not the same as saying the harm from both is equivalent. It is not. Because as harmful as the messages from society are, what society does not do is say that these messages are from God. Our culture does not say to me that the creator of the universe is disgusted by my cellulite."
- "Let us consider the harm that has been caused in God’s name, but let’s not be satisfied with stopping there. We must reach for a new Christian sexual ethic."
- "Where sex is concerned, for sexual flourishing to occur we must be guided by more than just the absence of “no” and the absence of harm. That’s why I believe we must also bring concern to our consent and mutuality. Concern moves us closer to the heart of Jesus’s own ethic: love God and our neighbor as ourselves. It requires us to act on another’s behalf. It reframes the choice entirely outside of our own self-interest in a way that consent and mutuality alone do not.”
- “Concern means taking notice of how our sexual behavior affects ourselves and each other. I may be having a mutually pleasurable, consensual relationship with someone, but if I am cheating on my spouse at the time, I have failed to show concern for the person I am married to. If I am in a crisis and totally distraught, I may be more likely to consent to sex when in fact it is the last thing I need. If someone intuits this and sleeps with me anyway, they have consent, but they are not showing care and concern. A sexual ethic that includes concern means seeing someone as a whole person and not just a willing body. The only way to show true concern for ourselves and others is to see, to pay attention."
From Chapter 1:
- “The Greek word for salvation is sozo, which means “to heal, bring wholeness, preserve.” This is what God does. God heals fractured parts of ourselves back together into wholeness."
- "Holiness is the union we experience with one another and with God. Holiness is when more than one become one, when what is fractured is made whole. Singing in harmony. Breastfeeding a baby. Collective bargaining. Dancing. Admitting our pain to someone, and hearing them say, “Me too.” Holiness happens when we are integrated as physical, spiritual, sexual, emotional, and political beings. Holiness is the song that has always been sung, perhaps even the sound that was first spoken when God said, “Let there be light".
- "Whether we realize it or not, we often find ways to alleviate feelings of existential aloneness through the seeking of unity. We fill our lives with things that distract us from the sound of our deepest isolation tapping at the window. Food, entertainment, success, sex, relationships, busyness, gossip—there are plenty of ways to divert our attention from the unavoidable, terrifying aloneness of human existence. But there is a difference between distraction from and alleviation of. Moments of unity—holiness—actually alleviate isolation, which is not the same as simply distracting us from our isolation. In the same way, smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee distract from the feelings of hunger, but eating food alleviates them. Temporarily, of course. But that is what it means to be human."
- "To connect to the holy is to access the deepest, juiciest part of our spirits. Perhaps this is why we set up so many boundaries, protections, and rules around both sex and religion. Both pursuits expose such a large surface area of the self, which can then be either hurt or healed. But when the boundaries, protections, and rules become more important than the sacred thing they are intended to protect, casualties ensue."
- "Holiness is about union with, and purity is about separation from."
From Chapter 2:
- "The nineteenth-century theologian Friedrich Schleiermacher defines heresy as “that which preserves the appearance of Christianity, and yet contradicts its essence.”
- “The heresy is this: with all the trappings of Christianity behind us, we who seek to justify or maintain our dominance over another group of people have historically used the Bible, Genesis in particular, to prove that domination is not actually an abuse of power at the expense of others, but is indeed part of “God’s plan.”
Footnote 52:
"The best definition of sin I have ever heard is found in Francis Spufford’s book Unapologetic: Why, Despite Everything, Christianity Can Still Make Surprising Emotional Sense (New York: HarperOne, 2013), where he defines it as HPFTU: “the Human Propensity to F*** Things Up.”
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- Bonnie Ramone
- 06-16-21
I'm currently finishing this in a forest alone.
I need to listen to this again and again. This past year and a half, I've struggled to find Christ in anything. Friends, he is here. Thank you for this book.
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- D. Thomas
- 11-01-20
will take time to digest...
Wow. This book will take some time to digest. I'm in the middle of thinking deeply about many things (people seem to call this "deconstruction") and I am not confident I "agree" with every word or claim in this book...but agreeing isn't really the point of the journey. It is most certainly written by a Pastor and hearing it read by the Pastor herself was a special experience. Nadia clearly cares deeply for her congregation and for the extension of her congregation...her readers. Give it a listen if you want to experience what it's like to be seen/heard/loved. That's how I felt.
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- Anonymous User
- 02-15-22
Water
Oh, Nadia. She seems to have a way of preaching that (and I’m speaking of “preaching” in the Christian Evangelist sense not just in general) not only inspires but also embodies. She speaks to flesh and spirit in the voice of a healer, a mother, a friend. Shameless is a prime example of this but carte blanche; absolutely liberated. The book speaks bluntly and rather crudely at times about sex and sexuality particularly as experienced by western Christians. It tackles the difficulty experienced by the faithful in terms of living in their bodies in a holistic way without denying the needs and desires of the body. She’s not calling for some orgy-like free-for-all a’la the hippie movement but an honest, and reflective look into how the church and culture overall contribute to our relationships with our sexual bodies, with sensuality and our relationship with pleasure. The spirit of reformation is found in how she approaches the church’s ministerial role in regards to the human as a being of desire as one that should be able to listen and adjust per person, per soul. That this should be undertaken with love and understanding, with acceptance of who and they are, how they relate to the physical world and affirmation instead of rejection, do condemnation and “othering”. Nadia invites Christians to reflect upon what doctrines, traditions and scriptural interpretation, exegesis and pastoral hermeneutics that may have been, and are actively causing damage in the psychosexual sense to people; tackling the root cause of these damaging and teachings and offering a new perspective based on an orthodox understanding of Christ and scripture combined with what we know today in regards to psychology and a healthier understanding of human sexuality. Through stories and anecdotes she preaches an idea of a church that not only seeks to expose its harmful teachings and change them under the guidance of the holy spirit but one that also seeks to expose the reparative and healing nature of relationship with Christ in regards to the true self, body and soul, naked and unafraid before God. It’s like cool water for the soul that suffers in the body. For people like myself, an lgbtq+ Christian who’s suffered from harmful teachings spouted by the church as true and inspired it’s absolutely refreshing to read Nadia’s words here. There’s an analogy she makes in the book with sexual minorities of faith and crops in a garden planted furthest from a watering sprinkler in how the church only seems to acknowledge cisgender heterosexual peoples bodies as sacred and worthy of sexual expression solely in the confines of sacramental marriage and all others who don’t or can’t fit into that category are not only shamed for their sexuality identities, gender orientations and the like but who’s desires connected to said identities/orientations are “sinful” and therefore the only way to truly be acceptable in the church as sexual beings is for them to deny themselves and try to force themselves into a cisgender heterosexual identity in order to have a place in the church, concluding that the only way they can see themselves as sacred and having dignity whilst expressing their sexual desires is to either be inside of a cisgender heterosexual sacramental marriage or to not have them at all not in the form of monastic, clerical or otherwise spiritual celibacy but a sort of forced utilitarian celibacy that operates as a symbolic castration. Thusly these people are ignored, unwatered by the sprinkler as the goal post for acceptable embodiment is moved away. The book offers itself as water to those who are excluded in this way and invites for others in the church to do the same.
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- Single Dad
- 05-13-23
A breath of fresh air
Growing up & living in the south is often suffocating with the manipulation that our “bible buckle” churches drown us in. So nice to have somebody finally say “The emperor had no clothes” and have the theological chops to back it up. Thank you Rev Nadia!
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- Julie
- 03-02-19
Affirming and validating; a true gift
I wish I had a book like this to read earlier in my life. Even though I’ve come to most of the same conclusions as Nadia Bolz-Weber presents in the book in my own time (through a lot of my own soul searching, theological study, and therapy), it was incredibly powerful to hear a pastor speak the words aloud. She affirmed my experiences, my sexuality, and validating my feelings. I felt seen by her and it’s one of the first times I’ve felt seen by a pastor in such a public platform. I know many people are still navigating through the damaging messages of the church, I definitely recommend this book as part of your journey. It was validating, encouraging, affirming, and enlightening.
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- linsyh
- 06-23-21
Changed my life.
This book changed my life. If you're just the tiniest bit interested, I would highly recommend it.
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- Jenna
- 10-20-20
This was worth it
This book was transformative. It was powerful, and I’m definitely going to read this again.
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- Mark Salyer
- 03-06-21
Liberating
I was so surprised by how deeply this book affected me. I found myself driving around LA, listening and crying and audibly talking back like I was in church. For anyone who grew up in fundamentalism, I know this book will liberate you. Thank you Nadia.
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